1315Journal Entry, Eve-October 30
- Nov 4, 2002Time: 8:00am
Duration: 15 minutes (open)
Position: Sitting in chair, eyes closed
Technique: Body and breath awareness
Variation: Chanted OM silently
This was the first time I have sat down and meditated in over a
month. My chatter was high but, surprisingly, my concentration was
pretty good. My body started to distract me; Date: October 30, 2002
back pain and jaw pain. This used to happen when I first started
meditating last spring. It was a short session. Not much else to say
about it, other than I was glad I did it. Not sure why.
Notes: I didn't plan on meditating today, it just happened. I guess I
was ready to start it up again. I stopped meditating because I got
busy with a big job and found I didn't have the time to do it. Then,
when I finished the job I had been working on, I realized that I just
didn't feel like meditating. I'm not sure why. I didn't want to force
it, so I just said, "okay, I'm stopping for a while." At first I
noticed that although I wasn't meditating, I seemed to be very aware
during the day, witnessing my life as it was taking place. Maybe this
was because I wasn't meditating in the morning so a meditative state
would kick in during the day instead. But, eventually, I began to
lose that awareness and started to get lost in my internal dialog of
thoughts, not noticing my emotions or my body (breathing shallow and
scrunched up posture.
I guess that is why I feel drawn to begin meditating on a daily basis
again. I feel like I am slipping away. From what I don't know. But
just as I felt it was to stop, now I feel it is time to start again.
We will see what happens.
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