WHAT'S TANTRA GOT TO DO WITH POLYAMORY? by Anastas Harris, Ph.D. &
Steven Vouge, D.C.
Tantra helps provide the depth of love and spiritual consciousness
among poly lovers that brings trust and safety and moves them to open
to the freedom and joy of their lovers with others as part of their
own good. And that's compersion.
Tantra is about living from the place of the God man and God woman.
This means that we live from a place of high truth and love. We come
from a place of honoring, reverence and cherishing where the god in
us bows down to the god in the other. We come from a place of deep
presence. We are totally present in the moment in all of our senses
and out of our mind. Our hearts are open. In such a consciousness
everything becomes more vivid and intense. We are in a place of
intense appreciation of what is and in being thus we create our
experience, whatever it is, whether it is what we chose or not, as
sacred and special.
Living tantrically isn't only the opposite of violence, disrespect
and indifference; living tantrically's also the opposite of
familiarity a disease that eats away at the turn-on of longterm
monogamous as well as polyamorous relationships.
When you live tantrically, you come from that place of high spiritual
connection and deep love that poly relationships that can give all
the lovers safety and lets them open to the freedom and joy of their
partner both with them and with others.
When you live tantrically, you deeply experience your presence in
existence and through feel oneness with the void, which is both the
self and all that is, You experience union with the divine. This
union' supreme union and it supersedes attachment to the lovers who
invoke it by their connection. It also is experienced with the lover
in deep sex. Thus, less is at risk and less is at stake. There is
no sense that you will be replaced and God does not want to be
greater than God. Godness replaces specialness.
Focus on the now, surrender to existence. Existence supports you;
you can handle the upsets better and transform them into
opportunities for self and relationship realization.
Through union with the divine, attachment and suffering diminish.
Goodness replaces specialness.
Tantra is about not being attached. It is about saying "Yes" to life
and flowing with life. Approach "what is" as if you chose it. Find
the blessing, the gift, in what shows up and you are in present
time. Perhaps you had a squabble with one of your partner but right
now you look at your garden in the sunlight. Its beauty in many
different forms consumes your consciousness. Nothing is lacking in
this moment. When you return to your partner, you're refreshed and
enlivened by your garden experience and you meet this partner with
If nothing is resolved, good things are nonetheless present.
Twilight beckons and a silver world is darkens into a star-filled
black night. You partner, still has his or her inner beauty; focus
on that beauty and love it. Your love and your partner's beauty it
will expand. Then, when you speak from the place of love and truth
in yourself to that place your partner, you connect. In the end,
with a tantric attitude, you avoid rage or blame and instead seize
the chance for you both to grow.
Dr. Steven Vogue & Dr. Anistas Harris are featured facilitators at
the Harbin POLYAMORY & TANTRA CONFERENCE, September 12-14 at Harbin
Hot Springs CA. The experiences they provide will entertain, involve
and climax the program Friday night, September 12. Join us.
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