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Tales from The Tail End ¬– neener, neener, neener!

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  • Mitch Lloyd
    I am a direct sort of person and I don t recognize subtlety at all, but even I can take a hint if it s clear enough. The LRCC calendar called for a trip today
    Message 1 of 1 , Sep 2, 2006
      I am a direct sort of person and I don't recognize subtlety at all,
      but even I can take a hint if it's clear enough.

      The LRCC calendar called for a trip today on the Lumber, with
      Marshall as trip leader. I e-mailed Marshall for details and this
      is the reply:

      Meet at Hardees on Hwy.711 in Lumberton. Will most likely do from
      Three Br. Rd. to Lowe Rd.
      Marshall

      Mitch Lloyd <mtlloyd@...> wrote:
      Let me know if we are going flooding on Saturday and where to meet.

      So at 9:30 this morning I am the only person at Hardees in LUMBERTON
      with a boat on top of the car. It finally dawns on me that Marshall
      probably meant Pembroke, on the other end of Hwy 711. Since our
      traditional kick off time is 9:30 with a water time of around 10 AM,
      I knew that I couldn't make it to the Hardees in Pembroke in time.
      I remembered the part about Lowe Road as a take-out so I drove there
      hoping to catch the group on the shuttle run. After waiting until
      after 10, I gave up. They must have changed trips at the last
      minute, Marshall fell out and the group didn't have a leader, the
      trip got called off at the last minute, or I just couldn't remember
      the details right.

      So I drove up U.S. 74 to HWY 71 and turned toward Pembroke to make
      my way home. Poor, dejected, rejected, neglected, castaway me, a
      man who tries to bring a bit of reverie and an alternative viewpoint
      to our little trips, a fledgling paddler who has evidently been
      ostracized from the LRCC, a reject, a cast off, another piece of
      trash on the river, flotsam (what's the difference between flotsam
      and jetsam?), pond scum, subjected to the humiliation of being left
      behind by the bigger kids. Heartbroken and downcast, I vowed to
      paddle another day.

      I stopped at a gas store in Pembroke because the fumes were running
      out. After filling my tank, I pulled out from the pumps and saw a
      green van with two kayaks on top sitting in line at the traffic
      light. I didn't recognize the young man in the passenger seat and I
      couldn't see the driver at first, but I hoped it was one of our
      group. I finally spied Marshall behind the wheel, smiling and
      waving, and I motioned him into the parking lot. He informed me
      that it was Hardees in Pembroke and the trip was for 10:30 AM, so I
      followed him on in. We made our connections with the rest of the
      group, put in at CHICKEN ROAD (not Three Bridges) and had a good day
      of paddling.

      As I've said, I'm pretty obtuse, but I begin to see a picture here
      and I can take a hint if it bites me on the butt hard enough.
      Various members of the LRCC have tried to kill me by pointing out
      choice paths on rivers, the group has tried to loose me in a swamp
      so I won't be found again, and now they are just flat out trying to
      hide the trips from me, but I've survived their best efforts and I
      keep finding them. NEENER, NEENER, NEENER!!!! What's next,
      changing the club name and opening a new website? Come on guys,
      don't hold back, tell me what you really think!

      Maybe I should start scouting around for another canoe club. Do you
      think my reputation has preceded me into South Carolina?
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