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28870Re: << lovingpurelove >> A Day with a Destiny of its Own

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  • Virginia S.
    Mar 1, 2006
      Dear Nachi,
      Thanks for continuing to ask the REALLY hard questions.  And congratulations for being able to do so.  So many people would rather tune out than to go inside and find out what is REALLY bothering them.  I'ts far easier to just whoo whoo out than to get to grips with the very, very profoundly baffling things in our life.
      Odd to say, but such a simple question -- Why are some days filled with ease and a sense of grace, others not -- require very complicated and profound answers. 
      I think the Gita is (and Tao Te Ching, which to some people's minds is not religious) is the only "Holy" book that attempts to answer this question.  To help people live correctly, there are many practical suggestions for the "average" spiritual seeker in the Gita.  I bring this up to point out why distancing ourselves from the question comes quite naturally -- it was never considered an important question to be answered before.  It is a question that comes with mass literacy ...  The holy books written for the perpetration of Kings are not concerned with this, as the Kings could be quite easily appeased, good or bad days, by letting him have "his way" by Divine Right!
      To think we can be total conscious creators of our own days is a dangerous fallacy.  In any given day, too many and so many forces are at play in any one's life.  While we may have discovered that seperation from the divine, Infinite source is painful, we still LIVE in a world of seperation  good v. evil, light v. dark, etc.  This means to live in the world we are going to experience ALL these oppositions.  The very idea of "self" is completely NEW, as a matter of fact.  Just below is a link to a fabulous website done by a young man in Nottingham. 
      A Story of Self: 
      The animated story of our journey from duality to Oneness.
      'A Story of Self ' - is an animation with a difference. Its purpose is to remind you of a loving connection,
      a connection that now wishes to embrace you. Click this link or the picture to play.
      You will  need the Flash plugin.
      Best viewed at 800x600 or 1024x768
      There are many more reasons that our days are not what we plan or wish for.
      One is that we instinctively know and know by "intuition" that some days are going to be showing us the effects of cause and effect (karma).  That doesn't mean we are aware of just OUR misdeeds or poor attitudes, this means we know on an inner level something is going to "go down" that reflects this essential Truth.  We actually do know something is going to happen!  We tighten up and get anxious, we dread what is coming in the future instead of staying in the NOW. 
      It's difficult to stay in the NOW for several reasons, one is that we are taught not to. We are taught to plan, plan, plan, to set goals, to "achieve" from the moment we enter school at a minimum.  The schools want to "look good" so they push the students to give the outside world a sense of being prestigious and of benefit.  They aren't very concerned with what happens to the students!  Even the so-called religious schools aren't very gungho about teaching people to stay in the moment or be loving to one's self.  This little blurb is skipping over the effects of our families -- our families grow up with these myths so they teach them to us as soon as we are stirring. 
      Some families think feeling joy is a "sin" (mine did) and they knock all sense of natural timing right out the window before a child can even talk!  They hold their children responsible for things they do, if the children were capable of a conscious choice!  Socialization may be important, but to smack down a child with assaults or nasty words is not the answer.  It merely makes us afraid ... and anxious.
      Too often they teach that your "reward" is in Heaven, or Nirvana or somewhere else, not to pursue ease on this planet which they see as a write off. 
      To my mind, it is extraordinary how even environmentalists (those who concern themselves with the earth's WELL fare) are often the very ones who seem to think the earth would be better off without human beings!  All these beautiful pictures of the earth they put out ... all without a single human being in the picture!  Yes, certain people have ravagged this planet but far more people have been good stewards and tended God's garden well than have ruined it!  The point I am making is that these contrary concepts about individuals run very DEEP throughout the "cosmic consciousness." 
      It is NOT a dog eat dog world, but that which we have made it so.  I read an article just this week saying that science is "proving" man is AGGRESSIVE.  Rubbish. Lots of men aren't (Ghandi, The Dalai Lama for examples) and if some aren't, than ALL cannot be.  It's not possible.
      If guilt is living in the past, then anxiety is about living in the future.  We get so hung up about what is GOING to happen, we forget what is really happening.  Over time, with conditioning, we get to be anxious about just about everything ... justifiably anxious.  Only it doesn't serve those of us on the spiritual search.  Once anxiety has reached a serious state, we internalize it.  We think anxiety is quite "natural".  I have been traumatized beyond what anybody on this list would think bearable.  Because I want to stay a good and honest person, I fight with the urge to think the worst is coming once again. But the anxiety can, and often has, taken on A LIFE OF IT'S OWN, unconnected with current events. 
      This is known as free floating anxiety.  There is no "apparent" cause.  Working with adults who had traumatized childhoods for five intense years, I made a startling discovery.  I asked them all to keep logs of WHEN these free floating anxiety went off.  To really pay attention to it.  Do you know, rather than being simply "free" floating, it almost always revolved around their parent's drinking patterns ... they would get anxious just about the time of "cocktail hour".  No one's truly researched "free" floating anxiety to my satisfaction.
      During my immigration "nightmare", I experiencd anxiety to the level that any torture victim would.  I never knew what was coming next.  (In psychiatric parlance, this is known as a "psychiatric void")  I could literally get into a state of "being beside myself".  Hard to explain to someone who hasn't experienced it, absolutely frustrating to live with and I am sure the effects are detrimental to one's physical as well as mental/emotional health.  But I had it.  Panic attacks out of nowhere,  a sense of impending DOOM, an inability to relate my "psychic" circumstances to anyone as well as that feeling of being beside myself.  My well developed connection with my Higher Self, would sit in observation of what anxiety my body and mind HAD to play out.
      Since the world is always looking for "differences" among people (we are 94% the same as the next person, really), using anxiety as a measure of who's better and whose lesser has become another way to place people into "categories", but I have yet to meet ONE individual who doesnt' have anxiety of one kind or another.  Not one.  It could be money, one's health, fear of losing one's allies, fear of not being "worthy", about earth calamities or impending war ... WHATEVER.  Anxiety is a common symptom ... of being human.  We may be spiritual entities living in human form, as someone has said, and with which I concur, but we are in human form and anxiety is NORMAL. It's only when we get into the vicious circle of thinking that we are more anxious than others, thus creating ever more anxiety that we are in a mind trap to our detriment.  When we start comparing our level of anxiety (same as comparing our levels of pain and misery), we end up feeling less than which surely will give us more anxiety!
      It turns out my son, who is in an excellent program for dealing with paranoid schizophrenia, was smoking pot and that is why he went so whacko this weekend.  He wasn't honest about it, but he "got caught" on a tox screen, so the whole story has been made very open as of today.  I was anxious because I want to see him reach his full potential and have a good life.  He thought that if he could feel "normal" by smoking for even an hour it was worth it to him.  Unfortunately being on heavy medication this is not wise and he could get thrown out of the hospital. This didn't happen, they're giving him another chance.  But my recommedation TO MYSELF that the only way for me to deal with this anxiety (and the states of mind that are anxiety but seem like something else) is to REACH OUT to someone who is secure enough to understand where I am coming from.  I need to exchange "energy" with others to stay a member of the human race.  In isolation, I just tend to give "fuel" to my worst imaginings which never helps me get back to feeling the {{{flow}}}.
      This society gives us ever more reasons to get OUT of the {{{flow}}}.  Trite, mundane television; media obsessed with everything but the Truth; overproduction of useless tripe we think we must have to be "happy" needing designer, prestige labels to feel like we are dressed "properly"; continuing to coddle white collar criminals who rip off people for millions even billions of dollars while jailing someone for stealing a loaf of bread; executing people on deathrow like we are still in the Middle Ages; building up a nuclear arsenal when there are 1000s more nuclear bombs than are needed to wipe out the entire planet; ignoring the victims in S. Asia, the Gulf Coast of the US and earthquakes worldwide instead of helping us help each other --- these things going on produce mass anxiety. 
      So, Nachi, it ain't about YOU, as it may "feel" (and I think you instinctively and correctly know this).  It's about all of us living in a time of such intense change as well as the very real cosmological changes (we are entering the photon belt and the heavens are filled with harmonies we do not understand) that adds to it all.
      As my son, who is wise beyond his years (although somewhat erratic) says -- we have our good days, we have our bad days.  Truer words were never spoken.  As I say: Welcome to the human race!
      It is a blessing Nachi that you can put these things into words. I am now being exposed to many "schizophrenics" who can't use words to describe what is going on with them, they have to use symbols to "talk" about things.  So I hope you just keep writing about it all, writing about it ALL.  It is your gift.  I get so much out of what you say, and I know others do, too.  They've told me so.  Each piece of paper or blank email screen you encountered is waiting for you to put down a song ... be it blues, a hymn, a rant, a mantra, a critical review, or a ballad.  But only YOU can write Nachi's musings with your voice. And I always look forward to your next piece,

      Nachi <nachiketan@...> wrote:
      Dear Virginia & Dear Mike,


      Thank You so much for replying..

      Virginia..I wrote to in black out and haste..in private..and wished only if I could have waited for some sense to arrive in my head..
      Sorry to know about the things that kept you and your son in pain, frustration.. Hope just as these tides of time have kept you overwhelmed..new tides will sail both of You to safer, better places inside and outside..Take Care.. Prayers, Love, Blessings


      Mike...what I wanted to ask actually was that how some days we are in natural alignment with the spirit, flow..and things seem to happen on their own accord..with complete ease..and no efforts..where as some days are so trying..and even if one tries not to mess up or be in flow..one falls down on the ground like a egg only to have a big flip flop..

      I dont get it..how it happens..While optimism is good.and I have tried it in much as quantity that I can find in my heart..it doesnt always helps..its like I try to bring good to the day..but its been perdecided by some force above me..that all I can do is to go with or underneath the tide..and swim with it..

      Hope today comes out to be Useful Day that will matter and make positive difference in my life..Wishing the Same for All.

      Much Love,


      "None are more hopelessly enslaved than those who falsely believe they are free." ~Goethe
      NOTICE: Due to Presidential Executive Orders, the National Security Agency may have read this email without warning, warrant, or notice. They may do this without any judicial or legislative oversight. You have no recourse nor protection save to call for the impeachment of the current President.
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