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Re: [linux-dell-laptops] unsubscribe

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  • George G. Garmus
    Hello: Please let me know how you successfully unsubscribe from egroups. GGG
    Message 1 of 8 , Jan 28, 2001
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      Hello:

      Please let me know how you successfully unsubscribe from egroups.

      GGG


      At 02:59 PM 1/25/2001 +0000, you wrote:
      >
      >How do i unsubscribe from this groups?
      >
      >--
      >
      >
      >--------------------------------------------------------------
      >Please post your X config files in the group links or database
    • Art Delano
      ... Many people have asked how to unsubscribe from The Service Formerly Known as eGroups. Finally, i have been granted clearance to inform you. 1. Dig a hole
      Message 2 of 8 , Jan 29, 2001
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        on 1/28/01 10:36 PM, George G. Garmus at gggarmus@... wrote:

        > Hello:
        >
        > Please let me know how you successfully unsubscribe from egroups.
        >
        > GGG
        >
        >
        > At 02:59 PM 1/25/2001 +0000, you wrote:
        >>
        >> How do i unsubscribe from this groups?

        Many people have asked how to unsubscribe from The Service Formerly Known as
        eGroups.

        Finally, i have been granted clearance to inform you.

        1. Dig a hole in your front yard.
        Many people do not have front yards. This is because they live in
        community hospices, apartment buildings, or in rubbish bins. If you are
        either temporarily or permanently without a front yard, the back yard will
        do. Alternatively, you can dig a hole in the turf of any prominently visible
        public space, such as the Speaker's Corner in London, the Mall in
        Washington, DC, or the grassy mound in Dallas, Texas.
        The hole should be deep enough to hold you up to your hips, and wide
        enough around to entirely hold a reasonably large truck tire.

        2. Fill the hole with mercury.
        Freddie Mercury was cremated, so you cannot fill the hole with him; there
        is too little to go around. Use liquid mercury, unless you live in a
        sufficiently cold environment, such as Neptune, where mercury is not liquid.
        In this case, you will be unable to unsubscribe and will continue receiving
        messages at your current address. It is recommended, in this extreme case,
        that you move to a more hospitable climate, such as Bakersfield, California,
        and get a Hotmail account.

        3. Swim in the mercury.
        Have fun and splash around. Mercury is very dense, but you may be denser.
        Try diving to the bottom, or seeing how long you can hold your breath under
        the surface.

        4. Sue Yahoo.
        This is the most complex part, but may be the most rewarding. After all,
        you've just been told by somebody in a mailing list to take a long warm bath
        in poison. You need remuneration for damages and abuse.
        eGroups is now YahooGroups. This is a stupid name and they deserve to be
        punished. They were the carrier of this vile, nasty message. Yahoo owns and
        operates this service. It is a dotcom that went IPO early in the boom years,
        and its stock is still trading at more than twice the initial offering
        price. As a consequence, they're all loaded. What they spend on lunch could
        feed you for years, nevermind cover your burial costs. In fact, they may be
        laughing at you right now, and that's unjust cruelty.
        a. Do not sue the author of this post.
        The author of this post is a subscriber to linux-dell-laptops. He just
        spent a lot of money on a computer. He won't have any left to give to you.
        b. Do not sue the moderator of this mailing list.
        This message was posted without his foreknowledge, so he was unable to
        keep it from destroying your life. The moderator is a busy person, managing
        the needs of hundreds if not thousands of people simultaneously, and does
        not get paid for his kind services. Therefore he will not have any money for
        you either.

        5. Settle with Yahoo.
        As part of the out of court settlement for your wrongful death lawsuit,
        instruct your lawyer to include a line demanding your email address be
        removed from the linux-dell-laptops mailing list.

        Come to think of it, this may not be the most efficient way of getting off
        the mailing list. On the other hand, you will be wealthy for the last few
        sad days you'll have remaining.

        Hope this helps.

        AjD
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