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Comestibles, News, 17s.

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  • Small Beer/LCRW
    LCRW seventeen somethings and a new pic Bookth Music Not music Beer News THINGS WE ARE Sad ABOUT THINGS WE ARE Happy ABOUT REVIEWS & NEWS Reviews and Book News
    Message 1 of 1 , Nov 28, 2005
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      LCRW seventeen somethings and a new pic
      Not music
      Beer News
      Reviews and Book News


      Hidden in here somewhere is a piece on Free Stuff. It's not actually free
      and it's not on the table of contents because our Lordly Squirrel Masters
      (why don't they go hibernate??) won't let us put it there. Why not free?
      Because they want you to Buy (fortunately it's past Buy Nothing Day) Books,
      or Zines, or T-Shirts, or Cards, or Something, and Then and Only Then will
      they let us into the vaults and take away some of their paperclip treasures
      (no fooling). There's other stuff, too, but, really, paperclips?



      If you live in the state of Kansas (which is perhaps a strange state of
      mind?) you can get 20% off BONE WARS: The Game of Ruthless Paleontology.
      Why? because they're scientists with a sense of humor.

      There's also a Zygote Games/Science Made Cool blog (aimed at smart kids and
      so on, hence the name. Wonder if they know the kids are already smarter than
      the adults? Why help them?) from we excerpt the hilarious post below about
      coffee (although we go for Tea, Tea, Tea!):

      "It's possible to make a case that modern civilization as we know it was
      built by coffee. In the Middle Ages, people drank wine and beer, pretty much
      exclusively. Much of the history of medieval Europe makes a lot more sense
      when you realize it was populated largely by drunk teenagers.
      "Then Europe discovered caffeine. Boom! The Scientific Revolution. The
      Enlightenment. The Industrial Revolution. Heavily-caffeinated Europeans
      built global empires to ensure reliable supplies of tea, coffee, sugar, and
      chocolate. Without coffee, we'd still be fatalistic drunken peasants."


      So, some of this stuff below is barely re-purposed (poached/refried) from
      this page: http://www.lcrw.net/lcrw/notajournal.htm

      LCRW -- Seventeen issues: seventeen somethings:

      1. LCRW hits seventeen and no one gives it a car. It has a permit to
      drive right through the woods, over the hills, down the freeway (EZPassing
      everything in its way) and off the pier. But that's ok: it's printed on
      waterproof paper. (For a certain value of water.)
      2. LCRW hits seventeen but still loses the Ashes. (Cricket joke.)
      3. LCRW hits seventeen. There are witnesses who swear it was the other
      way around.
      4. LCRW hit seventeen a long time ago but dresses young.
      5. LCRW hits seventeen but needed a triple-twenty to win. (Darts joke.)
      6. LCRW hits seventeen bars and is then led away for a "rest."
      7. LCRW hits seventeen but the eighteenth is standing behind it with a
      big stick and knocks it over.
      8. LCRW hits seventeen on the first hole. Retires gracefully to the
      nineteenth. (Golf story.)
      9. LCRW hits seventeen and runs away. Is found living in squalor in the
      basement of the Bertelsman building. Wrangles a distribution deal out of it.
      Still doesn't get to meet Jenny Agutter.
      10. LCRW hits seventeen and still has eight years of 25-Life to serve.
      11. LCRW hits seventeen aces in a row. (Somewhat boring tennis dream.)
      12. LCRW hits seventeen but the elevator never gets there.
      13. LCRW hits seventeen (?)
      14. LCRW hits seventeen and only then discovers the internet. Then sues.
      15. LCRW hits seventeen and goes to college. The next four years are a
      blur of fiction, poetry, and "other."
      16. LCRW hits seventeenth century music festivals like a tornado.
      17. LCRW hits seventeen new indie bookshops distributing it and falls over
      in a dead faint.

      The pic/new logo on this page is composed of the Valrhona bars going out to
      those peeps (mostly not vampiric Westerfeldian Peeps) who chose "Zine avec
      chocolat." (Some chocolate was consumed during the composing of this
      composted composition.)



      Michael Martone (FC2) by Michael Martone is all about Michael Martone.

      From Heather Rogers's Gone Tomorrow: The Hidden Life of Garbage. More than
      enough to provide food for, ah, thought:

      "In 1863, Dr. Ezra Pulling, a volunteer sanitation inspector in New York
      City, described the taxonomy of waste redistribution as follows:

      "Thus the textile contents of his [the scavenger's] bag and basket go to the
      paper mill and shoddy factories. Bones find their destiny in saponaeceous
      and fertilizing compounds; metallic articles are transferred to the junk
      shop; and even bits of coal find their appropriate uses. But there still
      remains a residuum which his professional genius has contrived to make a
      source of profit. This consists of fragments of bread and other farinacious
      [sic] food, decaying potatoes, cabbages, &c., interspersed with lifeless
      cats, rats, and puppies, this introduced to a post mortem fellowship. I
      shall not stop to trace the occasional metamorphosis of the latter into the
      familiar sausage, but proceed to state that much of the above miscellaneous
      collection is supplied to certain sailors' boarding-houses, and enters into
      the composition of bread puddings, and of a sort of "[s]longshore lobscouse"
      which Jack loves "not wisely but too well."
      "There is, however, a debris of material too thoroughly saturated with
      street-mire to be considered savory, even in the above compound; but this is
      by no means destined to be wasted. It is sold to the manufacturers of cheap
      coffee. It is desiccated, partially carbonized, mingled with a small
      proportion of chickory, &c., ground, and is ready to fulfill its destiny."

      Hey, thanks for using our Powell's links to pick up such goodies as James
      Patrick Kelly's new short novel BURN:



      So it seems Black Sabbath are going to be inducted into the rock and roll
      hall of fame (how can there be one of these again?). Should be an
      interesting ritual. Sabbath will probably induct the hall of fame into
      Satanism or set the place on fire or something.
      Just listened to VOLUME 4 -- an incredible album. There's a weepy song
      that can be taken or left ("Changes") but mostly it's that clean guitar
      sound. Maybe it was only murky on 4-watt 1980s stereos? The songs are just
      this excuse for some amazing guitar -- and, shock, keyboard! -- work that
      still sounds fresh.

      THE ROSEBUDS have a new CD out, BIRDS MAKE GOOD NEIGHBORS. It's pretty good
      but the band are just fantastic live. Maybe they'll come to Northampton and
      play at the Iron Horse. Or there's a nice park (Look Park) that does summer
      concerts. Go see The Rosebuds (we like them for more than just there name)
      in the next week or two. They are too smart to come up to the foggy north
      right now:

      Nov 28th * Baton Rouge LA * Red Star Bar
      Nov 30th * Tampa FL * The Orpheum w/ Shout Out Louds
      Dec 1st * Orlando FL * The Social w/ Shout Out Louds
      Dec 2nd * Ft. Lauderdale FL * Culture Room w/ Shout Out Louds
      Dec 3rd * Savannah GA * The Jinx
      Dec 9th * Columbia SC * The Garage
      Dec 10th * Atlanta GA * The Earl w/ Ronnie Specter!!

      In the meantime we gots some travelling people (not Wilburys) coming: Death
      Vessel are playing with local faves the Winterpills (inc. Phillip Price of
      The Maggies and so on). Yep, new discs of music by both bands are being
      thrown across the land to listeners everywhere. Stand up and catch one at
      your local Recorded Music Emporium.
      http://www.deathvessel.com/ -- who are also on tour w/ Iron & Wine and



      Looking for some presents? There's a wee sale at top shelf. All Flee is
      recommended: http://www.topshelfcomix.com/catalog.php?section=specialdeals

      Go see Walk the Line! Dance in the aisles. Kick out the footlights. Regret
      your '70s fashion choices. Ignore how you'll feel about now in the 2040s.

      New ish of Xerography Debt is coming with reviews, columns, ziney stuff of
      all flavors. This review zine has lasted quite a while and the two editors
      (Davida Gypsy Breier and Donny Smith) do an amazing job at getting this out
      3 times a year. If you want to volunteer time or buy a zub for a zine
      library or Something, check it out below:
      http://www.leekinginc.com/xeroxdebt/xd17.htm -- nice color cover!



      One of these days we will publish a book on beer and make everyone at the
      bank and trade shows happy. In the meantime, we will just drink Ruddles,
      English ales in tins, Berkshire Brewing Company (BBC!) Berkshire Ale
      growlers, and so on, and make note of beer stories (to be forgotten by the
      time the book comes out):

      Female genius lay behind Andes Ale:



      No non-violent revolution or impeachment in the USA yet. What's with that?
      No diesel minivans in the USA yet.
      The cat sat on the mat. (We are allergic to the damn cat.)
      Someday soon the sun will go out and we will all regret not saving those
      candle stubs.
      We did not buy Google stock.



      Give Bees and Trees to everyone you know at http://www.heifer.org !
      2005 coming to a close means the next US election is that tiny bit closer.
      Choconita cometh. It's a secret, ok?
      We have the latest ish of TRUNK STORIES. Pretty! Illustrated!
      Lunch is almost ready.
      Gwenda Bond interviewed Greg Pak:
      We did not buy Krispy Kreme stock.



      News: We have hardcovers of Sean Stewart's PERFECT CIRCLE and Jennifer
      Stevenson's TRASH SEX MAGIC.
      This is where our shop begins: http://www.lcrw.net/lcrw/shopping3.htm

      Beautiful new edition of MOCKINGBIRD is in stores now. Those are Carol
      Emshwiller's hands and that painting is by Elaine Chen.

      Ok, mostly reviews. Which we all read religiously, right? 36,000 LCRW
      subscribers all scanning their own daily for the AP reviews, then the local
      reviews. Then its online to check out the NY Times, the Washington Post,
      Seattle Times, and other weeklies. Then its the litblogs, seeing who Gwenda
      (Dear Aunt Gwenda!) or Maud or Matt are pointing toward. Then it's a look at
      the blog aggregator which pulls in more reviews. Check the reviews picked up
      by Google News. BoingBoing and Metafilter probably have a few worth checking
      What's that? 5 PM already. Oh well, I'll start on that project tomorrow.
      Time to go home and write a few reviews for the blog.


      Read the introduction:

      "When The Lord of the Rings was first published, Allen and Unwin knew that
      such a strange book by an outsider of Tolkien¹s idiosyncratic calibre needed
      a few literary heavy-hitters to offer positive judgement, paving a way into
      the libraries of sophisticated readers and the dailies¹ books pages. In thus
      inventing the celebrity blurb, they turned to C.S. Lewis, Richard Hughes,
      and a fiercely intelligent writer of startling breadth named Naomi
      -- Strange Horizons

      A gag. TRAVEL LIGHT was first published before most of us were born. It's a
      wonderful and weird book. Something not like the other books you're reading
      -- unless you are reading a novel about a young woman rescued by bears,
      raised by dragons, and taunted by heroes. Halla is all of these and more.
      She is a delightfully spiky protagonist with a will of her own.
      So, the gig (or the gag) here is photos, pix, all those things. You will
      have seen the great Kevin Huizenga drawing on the cover (avec dragons and
      all!). What is being looked for is pictures of the book in odd situations,
      travelling (light or otherwise), unexpected, or out of kilter. Or comfy and
      at home atop the dragon's pile of treasure. Feel free to check out your
      local bookshop, Borders, or B&N (we know it's out there) to find a copy for
      picturing. Post your pic online somewhere -- you can even post it on Amazon
      if this linky thing works.

      Then email us about your picture. We will have an impartial set of judges
      (lured from an international biking event through the skillful use of
      Putney, VT, apple pie) judge the pictures on the basis of imagination,
      legality, fitness, ballroom dancing technique, and use as a paperweight. Or,
      maybe we'll just send you something for your trouble. A copy of LCRW, a
      paperback, chocolate, something like that.

      Added ebook version.

      Hey! Carol Emshwiller was just given a Life Achievement World Fantasy Award!


      Maureen F. McHugh & Sarah Willis in three part conversation:

      Added ebook version.

      "McHugh¹s prose style is unique."
      -- LEO (Louisville Eccentric Observer)

      "McHugh's work doesn't rely on exploding spaceships and laser battles but
      rather on the intensely felt epiphanies of ordinary people."
      -- Challenging Destiny

      Limited Edition: http://www.lcrw.net/special/mchugh/index.htm


      "There are many books of writing instruction out there, but what sets
      "Storyteller" apart is the sense that Wilhelm really knows students and
      knows how to teach them to craft a professional story."
      -- The Oregonian

      "Full of pithy, relevant advice for writers, amusing recollections of the
      field's current giants during their early days, and the fullest published
      account to date of how a revered program was established."
      -- Scifi Dimensions

      Department of No Comment

      A while ago when we were sending out all the review copies and so on for
      Kate Wilhelm's memoir of the Clarion Writer's Workshop and book on writing,
      Storyteller, we sent a query to AARP The Magazine to see if they were
      interested in a copy of the book, an interview etc. Yesterday we received
      this response:
      Dear Mr. Grant:

      Thank you for contacting AARP. We appreciate hearing from you.
      Due to the very limited space in our bi-monthly magazine, a decision was
      made not to accept poetry submissions at this time. Should we decide to
      include poetry in the future; an announcement will be posted in AARP The

      PERFECT CIRCLE (aka Firecracker)

      "An unpredictable ghost story and an unexpected love story... Stewart shifts
      skilfully between humour and terror."
      -- The Independent on Sunday


      "Charm, wry humor, invention and canny social observation."
      -- Los Angeles Times

      LCRW 16

      Review spotted on a blog. (Thanks Davida!)
      Note: No matter what the masthead may claim (and we generally need a Ouija
      Board to understand it) Kelly is still connected to LCRW.


      FREE STUFF to go with orders (ask for it by name: Free Stuff!). You has to
      order at least one book to get this stuff. Or a goodly number of zines or

      (1) Black XL Free Comic Book Day T-shirt
      (1) White XL Optic Nerve T-shirt
      (1) Tiny flat style Rolodex
      (1) Epson ink cartridge: for Stylus 400/440/640/660/740 etc
      (1) Robert Whiting's tale of baseball folk in Japan: You Gotta Have Wa (may
      have already been given out, so be ready for a substitute)
      (More) The Red Pencil of Death!
      (1) A box of assorted paperclips.
      (1) Valrhona chocolate bar.

      And, the creme de la creme: A one-off "Teamwork" Pocket Pal 2006 Diary with
      "Compliments of SMALL BEER PRESS Northampton, MA" embossed on the front.
      This came in the mail to us and apparently we will not be taking these
      chaps up on their offer of making more of these. Diary has all the usual
      features (365 days!), some kind of faux leather cover, and a pen(!)
      It really is an amazing Objet d'Art. Maybe. Good luck.

      PS No returns on Free Stuff!

      Cycle carefully!


      Small Beer Press
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