Konformist: FeedBack & Humor 07-14-99
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FeedBack & Humor
I told you so... WAKE the F@#$ up!
Date: Tuesday, July 13, 1999 05:10:02 PM
HEY... I hate to tell you that I told you so... (actually I'm starting to
but... at the time the Unabomber was arrested,
I TOLD YOU SO!
"The Unabomber was a mind-control victim."
- said I, William Cooper, on the Hour Of The Time, and in MAJESTYTWELVE. And
it's not over... these incidents will continue until the conspirators have
completely disarmed and enslaved the American Sheople.
When the Unabomber was arrested I informed you that Kaczynski was the victim
of a mind-control operation. And of course, as usual, nobody believed that
such a thing could be possible... not in America. Unfortunately the America
that the Sheople envision ceased to exist a long time ago. Alexander Cockburn
confirmed my research when he revealed Tuesday, July 6, in a Los Angeles
Times copyrighted column, that Theodore (Ted) Kaczynski, the Unabomber, was a
volunteer in Harvard conducted mind-control experiments sponsored by the CIA
in the 1950's and 60's . The story was gleaned from the just published book
The United States of America Vs. Theodore John Kaczynski by Michael Mello. In
the book Mello notes that during his Harvard years Kaczynski volunteered to
be part of a psychological experiment supervised by Dr. Henry Murray, now
deceased. The program was under complete control of the Director of CIA
Technical Services, Sidney Gottlieb. You may remember Gottlieb as the one who
personally fed a dram of LSD to unsuspecting Army officer Frank Olson,
plunging him into madness, which ultimately caused Olson to leap to his death
from an upper story window of the Statler-Hilton Hotel in New York City.
Legal action brought by Olson's family was recently in the news. You may
purchase this story from the L.A. Times WebSite for $1.50. It appeared in the
Tuesday, July 6, 1999 Home Edition of the Los Angeles Times, Metro Section,
Page: B-5 under the title, We're Reaping Tragic Legacy From Drugs by
Alexander Cockburn. See also:
Why would the Church of the Subgenius kill Kirby?
The holy scriptures doth say (or at least a good rant that I heard Ivan
Stang once give said) that 'Should you meet Bob on the road.. Kill Him! If
it is the true Bob then he's just pop up again like a cartoon. If not
you'll have killed a false Bob.' Killing members of the church is a long
standing tradition, ranging from the ceremonial killing of Bob to the sacred
scourging of the temple prostitutes to death with whips of dried prairie
squid tentacles. It's just how we say.. 'I love you.' :-)
-Rev. Dr. Pope Impious XXIII, ULC, RSVP, EIEIO
FeedBack: Sherman Skolnick Sounds Off!
Date: Tuesday, July 13, 1999 07:08:15 PM
Cool stuff on the Czar, but Skolnick obfuscates on the beneficiaries and
financing of the Bolsheviks, by playing the Rockefeller card.
Max Warburg, head of German Intelligence, is responsible for Lenins train
ride into Russia.
Paul Warburg,(brother of Max) Chairman and Father of the Fed was forced to
resign because of his role in financing the Bolsheviks, he was assisted in
the financing by Otto Kuhn, Loeb, Schiff and a few others who were hardly
members of the Rockefeller family or cartel, but were "related" to and
aligned with the Rothschilds, whom control(led) the Bank of England, in
whose vault the Czars fortune was held.
Sherman Skolnick appearantly hasn't bothered to research anything as per
IF he had bothered to check things out like a REAL Researcher would, and Not
a Sensationalist that seemingly appears to only need to keep his ego inflated
by being in the spotlight.
He Would of discovered that this purported "monolopy" has been broken up with
the onset of at least 2 to 3 other comapnies providing internet domain names,
addresses, a while back.
If you go to http://rs.internic.net you will find links to the other
companies that are providing names as well as name blocks.
But why should anyone listen to me. I am just a lowly Net Surfer, and not
someone that has an axe to grind, or hidden agenda's.
FeedBack: The Shroud of Turin
Date: Monday, July 12, 1999 02:51:29 PM
Wow, reading to the end, the "son of god" had DNA, that must means it is
the DNA of God, and god is a Jewish male.
Since a virgin birth (parthogenesis) can only produce a female (and one
with only one X chromosone at that), then said creature would have to be a
clonen of the female.
Hence Jesus could not have been a son of god, and since he was a Jewish
male, he had a Jewish father (I am assuming the putative Cohanim Gene).
If indeed there is Jewish DNA on the Shroud, and someone is not up to hanky
panky, contaminating the evidence for political-religious means, then the
only possibility is
that the person covered by the shroud was a flesh and blood human being,
not a half god, or demigod which is what this Iezeus was supposed to be.
What strikes me strange about this whole Iezeus tale, is why would ole YHVH
go through all of the trouble to give "his son" a human mother. According
to the Old Fable, YHVH can do anything, so why not bring "his son" into
existence "full blown" ex nihilo, out of nothing, with all the powers
needed to "save mankind", and why let him down miserably on a cross like a
convict? If indeed ole YHVH exists and is omnipotent and omniscient why
all of this nonsense in the first place, why all the social discomfort, the
lies, the murders, the deceit, the chicanery?
That mature, supposedly sentient homo sapiens can still "believe" these
tales and try to prove them is profound evidence that there is a dearth of
intelligent life on Earth.
It seems according to the Talmud that there were at least two Jesus, one
who lived during the reign of Alexander Jannaeus (Good King Jonathon or
Yohaton) circa 104-78 b.c.e, and another a Yeshu bar Pantera (Panther)Jeshu
ben Pantera practiced magic and committed heresyname of Myriam. You can
read about Yeshu ben Pantera in the Sepher Toldoth Yeshu or The Jewish Life
of Christ, an inexpensive booklet that one could get, a few years back from
PO Box 2117, Austin, Texas
Several passages in the Talmud and the Tol'oth Jeshu pose tht Jesus was
born to an adulteress.
For a Jewish view of Jesus and a refutation of his historicity
partly extracted as follows:
If Jesus was not an historical person, where did the whole New Testament
story come from in the first place? The Hebrew name for Christians has
always been Notzrim. This name is derived from the Hebrew word neitzer,
which means a shoot or sprout--an obvious Messianic symbol. There were
already people called Notzrim at the time of Rabbi Yehoshua ben Perachyah
(c. 100 B.C.E.). Although modern Christians claim that Christianity only
started in the first century C.E., it is clear that the first century
Christians in Israel considered themselves to be a continuation of the
Notzri movement which had been in existence for about 150 years. One of the
most notorious Notzrim was Yeishu ben Pandeira, also known as Yeishu
ha-Notzri. Talmudic scholars have always maintained that the story of Jesus
began with Yeishu. The Hebrew name for Jesus has always been Yeishu and the
Hebrew for "Jesus the Nazarene" has always been "Yeishu ha-Notzri." (The
name Yeishu is a shortened form of the name Yeishua, not Yehoshua.) It is
important to note that Yeishu ha-Notzri is not an historical Jesus since
modern Christianity denies any connection between Jesus and Yeishu and
moreover, parts of the Jesus myth are based on other historical people
We know very little about Yeishu ha-Notzri. All modern works that mention
him are based on information taken from the Tosefta and the Baraitas -
writings made at the same time as the Mishna but not contained in it.
Because the historical information concerning Yeishu is so damaging to
Christianity, most Christian authors (and even some Jewish ones) have tried
to discredit this information and have invented many ingenious arguments to
explain it away. Many of their arguments are based on misunderstandings and
misquotations of the Baraitas and in order to get an accurate picture of
Yeishu one should ignore Christian authors and examine the Baraitas
A guy is reading his paper when his wife walks up behind him and smacks him
on the back of the head with a frying pan. He says, "What was that for?" She
says, "I found a piece of paper in your pocket with 'Betty Sue' written on it
"He says, "Jesus, honey...remember last week when I went to the track?
'Betty Sue' was the name of the horse I went there to bet on." She shrugs and
walks away. Three days later he's reading his paper when she walks up behind
him and smacks him on the back of the head with the frying pan again He
says, "What was that for?" She says, "Your horse called."
An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he
has been living with for the last 40 years.
The Wizard says, "Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words
that were used to put the curse on you."
The old man says without hesitation, "I now pronounce you man and wife."
A blond joke.
A guy took a blonde out on a date. Eventually they ended up parked at a
"lovers point" where they started making out. After things started getting
pretty good, he thought he might get lucky, so he asked her "Do you want to
get into the back seat?"
"NO!" she answered.
Okay, he thought, maybe she's not ready yet.
Now he has her shirt and skirt off, the windows are steamed, and things are
getting really hot, so he asks again,
"Do you want to get into the back seat?" "NO!" she answers again.
Now he has her bra off, they're both very sweaty, and she even has his pants
unzipped. Okay, he thinks, she HAS to want it now.
"Do you want to get into the back seat NOW?" he asks again.
"NO!" she answers yet again.
Frustrated, he demands "Well, why not!"
"Because I want to stay up here with you!"
A Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman walk into a pub. They proceeded to
each buy a pint of Guinness. Just as they were about to enjoy their creamy
beverage three flies landed in each of their pints, and were stuck in the
thick head. The Englishman pushed his beer away from him in disgust. The
Scotsman fished the offending fly out of his beer and continued drinking it
as if nothing had happened. The Irishman too, picked the fly out of his
drink, held it out over the beer and then started yelling, "SPIT IT OUT, SPIT
IT OUT YOU BASTARD!!!!"
YOU KNOW YOU'RE A REDNECK IF......
The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.
You let your twelve-year-old daughter smoke at the dinner table in front of
You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
You think a woman who is "out of your league" bowls on a different night.
Jack Daniels makes your list of "Most Admired People."
You think Genitalia is an Italian airline.
You wonder how service stations keep their restrooms so clean.
Anyone in your family ever died right after saying, "Hey, y'all watch this"
Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.
You go to your family reunion looking for a date.
Four surgeons were taking a coffee break and were discussing their work.
The first said, "I think accountants are the easiest to operate on. You open
them up and everything inside is numbered."
The second said, "I think librarians are the easiest to operate on. You open
them up and everything inside is in alphabetical order."
The third said, "I like to operate on electricians. You open them up and
everything inside is color-coded."
The fourth one said, "I like to operate on lawyers. They're heartless
spineless, gutless, and their heads and their ass are interchangeable."
It was at the end of the school year, and a kindergarten teacher was
receiving gifts from her pupils. The florist's son handed her a gift. She
shook it, held it overhead, and said, "I bet I know what it is. Some flowers."
"That's right" the boy said, "but how did you know?"
"Oh, just a wild guess," she said.
The next pupil was the sweet shop owner's daughter. The teacher held her
gift overhead, shook it, and said, "I bet I can guess what it is. A box of
"That's right, but how did you know?" asked the girl.
"Oh, just a wild guess," said the teacher.
The next gift was from the son of the liquor store owner. The teacher held
the package overhead, but it was leaking. She touched a drop of the leakage
with her finger and touched it to her tongue. "Is it wine?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied, with some excitement.
The teacher repeated the process, taking a larger drop of the leakage to her
tongue. "Is it champagne?" she asked.
"No," the boy replied, with more excitement.
The teacher took one more taste before declaring, "I give up, what is it?"
With great glee, the boy replied, "It's a puppy!"
One day a fag was jogging through the park. There was a wino
passed out on the park bench, so the jogger decided, "Ah,
what the hell", went over, dropped the wino's pants, gave
it to him up the ass, then took $10.00 and put it in the
When the wino awoke he reached in his pocket found the
$10.00 and went straight to the liquor store, and asked the
clerk for his most expensive bottle of wine.
Next day the fag was jogging through park and again the
same old wino is all passed out on the park bench. So the
fag drops the wino's pants, does him up the ass again, then
puts another $10.00 in the wino's pocket.
The wino wakes up, finds another $10.00 and heads straight
to the liquor store, and tells the clerk, "I want your
best bottle of wine."
Come the 3rd day, the faggot is jogging through the park
sees the same old wino passed out. So he drops the wino's
pants and gives it to him up the ass yet again, but when he
goes to get $10.00 out of his pocket, he finds out he only
has a $20.00. So he gives the wino the $20.00.
The wino wakes up, finds the $20.00, goes right to the
liquor store, and tells the clerk that he wants the cheapest
bottle of wine.
The clerk says, "Wait a minute. Two days in a row you come
in here with $10.00, and want my most expensive bottle of
wine. Today, you have $20.00 and want the cheapest. What
The wino replies, "Yeah, well, that expensive stuff is
making my ass burn."
WHAT THE DOCTOR SAYS
"This should be taken care of right away."
I'd planned a trip to Hawaii next month but this is so easy and profitable
that I want to fix it before it curse itself.
"Welllllll, what have we here..."
Since he hasn't the foggiest notion of what it is, the Doctor is hoping you
will give him a clue.
First I have to check my malpractice insurance.
"Let me check your medical history."
I want to see if you've paid your last bill before spending any more time
"Why don't we make another appointment later in the week."
I need the money, so I'm charging you for another office visit.
"I really can't recommend seeing a chiropractor."
I hate those guys mooching in on our fees.
Since he hasn't the faintest idea of what to do, he is trying to appear
thoughtful while hoping the nurse will interrupt.
(Proctologist also say this a lot.)
"We have some good news and some bad news."
The good news is he's going to buy that new BMW, and the bad news is you're
going to pay for it.
"Let's see how it develops."
Maybe in a few days it will grow into something that can be cured.
"Let me schedule you for some tests."
I have a 40% interest in the lab.
"I'd like to have my associate look at you."
He's going through a messy divorce and owes me a small fortune.
"How are we today?"
I feel great. You, on the other hand, look like hell.
"I'd like to prescribe a new drug."
I'm writing a paper and would like to use you for a guinea.
"If it doesn't clear up in a week, give me a call."
I don't know what the hell it is. Maybe it will go away by itself.
"That's quite a nasty looking wound."
I think I'm going to throw up.
"This may smart a little."
Last week two patients bit through their tongues.
"Well, we're not feeling so well today, are we?"
I can't remember your name, nor why you are here.
"This should fix you up."
The drug salesman guaranteed that it kills all symptoms.
"Everything seems to be normal."
I guess I can't buy that new beach condo after all.
"I'd like to run some more tests."
I can't figure out what's wrong. Maybe the kid in the lab can solve this one.
"Do you suppose all of this stress could be affecting your nerves?"
He thinks you are crazy and is hoping to find a psychiatrist who will split
"Why don't you slip out of your things."
I don't enjoy this any more than you do, but I've got to warm my fingers up
"If those symptoms persist, call for an appointment."
I've never heard of anything so disgusting. Thank God I'm off next week.
"There is a lot of that going around."
My God, that's the third one this week. I'd better learn something about this.
It was time for Father John's Saturday night bath and young Sister
Madalene Edwards had prepared the bath water and towels just the way the
old nun had instructed. Sister Magdalene Edwards was also instructed not
to look at Father John's nakedness if she could help it, do whatever he
told her to do, and pray.
The next morning the old nun asked Sister Edwards how the Saturday night
bath had gone. "Oh, sister," said the young nun dreamily. "I've been
"Saved? And how did this fine thing come about?" asked the old nun.
"Well, when Father John was soaking in the tub, he asked me to wash him,
and while I was washing him he guided my hand down between his legs
where he said the Lord keeps the Key to Heaven."
"Did he now," said the old nun evenly.
Sister Edwards continued, "And Father John said that if the Key to
Heaven fit my lock, the portals of Heaven would be opened to me and I
would be assured of salvation and eternal peace. And then Father John
guided his Key to Heaven into my lock."
"Is that a fact," said the old nun even more evenly.
"At first it hurt terribly, but Father John said the pathway to
salvation was often painful and that the glory of God would soon swell
my heart with ecstasy. And it did, it felt so good being saved."
"That wicked old Devil," said the old nun. "he told me it was Gabriel's
Horn, and I have been blowing it for 40 years!!
* Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and
* Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
* Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?
* Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?
* Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?
* Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?
* Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?
* How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?
* If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the
* If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
* If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?
* If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a
height, what would happen?
* If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn
on the headlights?
* You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the
package says, "Open somewhere else"
* Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?
* Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?
* Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment,
but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?
* You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why
can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?
* Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn
down the volume on the radio?
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