Lone Nutter News 07-04-03
- Please send as far and wide as possible.
Editor, The Konformist
Lone Nutter News
In This Issue:
Anal-Apolis in XTC
by Al Martin
Intuitive Media Prediction
Exclusive Interview with Bayless Secord
Celebrity DNA Psychic
Arjuna Diaz: Cram Artist Extraordinaire
Book Review by
Anal-apolis in XTC
XTC Magazine, now peaking its brains out in Minneapolis with its
first issue, is publishing my Anal-apolis article which originally
premiered in the Twin Cities Reader weekly back in 1996. The
overall response to my observation of overt geo-political anal
retentiveness and its devastating consequences in the form of pseudo-
liberalism, hypocritical 'Minnesota Nice', PC Nazis infiltrating
academia and the artworld etc. was A: enthusiastically received by
those who had moved to Minneapolis from elsewhere and B: hated by
those who grew up in Minneapolis or Minnesota in general (the fish
not seeing the water he/she lives in syndrome). I received some
rather nasty letters from and phone calls from irate native people. I
burst a few civic bubbles but not as many as I wanted to, for
regional anality still persists to this day in Minneapolis-perhaps
why XTC has deemed it fit to publish once again. So check it out if
you can. No websites that I know of are posting Anal-apolis-although
it was on the Gnostic Liberation Front site which is temporarily out
of commission and will be up and running ... hopefully soon? Eh
contact RPM at TwoRabbits@... for more info. on where to find
copies of XTC, ad rates, writer's guidelines etc.
Uri Dowbenko recently sent me a copy of The Conspirators: Secrets of
an Iran-Contra Insider by Al Martin. My full review of this hair
graying book will appear in the next edition of LNN. For now I'm
compelled to urge LNN readers, in honor of the real Independence Day,
to go out and buy this book. I have never come across something that
has made me so literally sick to my stomach, considering its
directness and the depth/breadth of investigation into the criminal
cabal otherwise known as our government. Mr. Martin obviously has
the courage to come forth and name the names like I've never seen
done before. The Bush moniker appears very frequently
throughout....surprise surprise. Please go to: www.almartinraw.com
for more info. on how to order this book. If The Conspirators
doesn't make you blood boiling angry.....nothing will!
Intuitive Media Prediction
I usually refrain from making predictions-both in my work as an
Intuitive Counselor, Integral Tarot reader and even in some of my
satirical writing-but this one I have to share with you:
I suspect Ronald Reagan is dead but the media is not revealing this.
Right before the polls open for the Presidential election in the fall
or maybe even during the republican convention in NYC near the 911
anniversary, his death will then be announced on every front page in
America. Thus the heart/puppet strings of the populus will be pulled
in an even more rightward direction-people will then go out and vote
for Bush as an expression of their 'sorrow' over the loss of
the 'greatest' president we ever had.
Sometimes cynicism such as expressed above creates unusual clarity
and allows me to see into the future in a strangely undistorted way.
However, please pray that I'm wrong and that this prediction won't
come true because it really could sway the election considering how
gullible the American public seems to be at the moment. Now that I
think about it-if Ronny doesn't croak, then maybe orders to have his
plugged pulled will then be given-perhaps by Kervorkian himself.
Bayless Secord Interview Exclusive
Bayless Secord is a rather unusual fellow in that he claims to have
an ability to psychically read celebrity DNA. After remotely
scanning the glittery genomes of such stars as Britney Spears and
Madonna from the confines of his home in Medina, Mn. Bayless has
concluded that the key to humanity's salvation is hidden within
celebrity DNA. Lone Nutter News recently contacted him in an attempt
to learn more about this promising potential which may give the
Genome Project a new lease on the future of the earth.
Lone Nutter News: So how do you psychically read celebrity DNA?
Bayless: I envision my third eye as an electron microscope and focus
it on a single DNA molecule of say...Bruce Willis or even Keaunu
Reeves when I'm feeling daring. Then I use the cytoplasm as a kind
of movie screen on which to view the DNA codes that contain all sorts
of information. By doing this, I've come to the conclusion that
people in high profile positions like movie stars and rock musicians
have a better chance of fully activating their unused DNA to create
meta-human genes. Being in the media spotlight is activating this
junk DNA somehow-which still remains dormant in non-celebrities...the
average six pack Joe..the nine to five slob so to speak who can't
even get a letter to the editor published in his local paper.
LNN: What do you see specifically?
Bayless: Well in the blockbuster celebrities I scan like Arnold
Schwarznegger there are lots of explosions, steamy sex scenes between
DNA molecules, car chases involving sub-optimal genes, lot's of
profanity between RNA and DNA, gun fire, tedious second acts with
boring amino acid subplots......the usual Hollywood formula movie
stuff but all within this microscopic world I psychically scan.
Fortunately I'm able to see through this crap. I'm starting to see
more interesting genetic movies within the DNA of premium celebrities
like Cher and Jewel for example. I believe that the these movies I
psychically see may transform our society into something that is debt
free, has universal health care, models its government after the one
in Sweden, DNA movies that promote world peace and sound ecological
practices esp. by major corporations like Exxon, Halliburton. The
catch however is to make celebrities aware of these salvational,
molecular movies going on in their DNA. This is where Bayless comes
in: I hope to help celebrities read the script of their own DNA by
using my psychic abilities and show them how to act accordingly.
Once enough celebrities become aware of what is going on, I believe
that all of Hollywood will completely merge with the Biotech industry
and start making the DNA movies I am seeing on the molecular level
even if they don't conform to the usual formula of sex, drugs,
violence, profanity. I trust that someday I'll be a psychic
consultant during the production of these gene movies and that
certain celebrities will totally transform the world into a peaceful
and healthy place to live by willingly, altruistically activating
their junk DNA.
LNG: Will this DNA be projected onto a movie screen in a suburban
theater someday for the average person to see?
Bayless: Let's hope so. I do foresee a mass activation of fully
evolved, twelve stranded DNA but only if two stranded people go see
the DNA celebrity movies at their local theater or on pay per view.
The more people who see DNA movies the greater the chance of
LNN: Who will direct these movies?
Bayless: Oh...what I call Spiritual Scientists.
LNN: Isn't that rather oxymoronic? Surely you'll need scientific
proof to get this project of yours going-to sell it not only to
Hollywood, but the Biotech industry you see merging with Hollywood.
Bayless: I really don't think I need scientific proof. All I need is
one major celebrity to endorse my work like Demi Moore, pitch it to
Spielberg and Biotech and the rest will be easy. Maybe I'll be
directing the movies!
LNN: How do you know when something you see in DNA is true or not?
Bayless: I know I'm onto something when my heart chakra warms up.
And I also know I'm being told a genetic lie when my skin starts to
crawl. The proof is in my intuition and not statistics. The other
day I tried reading President Bush's DNA but frankly speaking...based
on what I saw, I don't think the man is human or anyone else in his
administration for that matter.
LNN: Do you really think Hollywood will be sold on your ideas through
your intuition or celebrity endorsement?
Bayless: Well I am planning to read the DNA of producers, maybe even
gene scientists themselves if I have to. Who knows where this will
LNN: Will you read my DNA and see if I have the same salvational
potential as Andrew Firestone?
Bayless: You're not a celebrity. Call me after you appear on a talk
show or star in a mainstream movie, O.K.? Then we'll talk business.
You'll be in a better position to afford my rates!
LNN: I'll keep you posted on that one. Well, Bayless...thanks for
talking with us. I'll be looking for your name when the credits roll
in Mariah Carey's DNA when I psychically scan it.
Bayless: Oh! That would be sweet! Heaven indeed!
Arjuna Diaz: Cram Artist Extrordinaire
In 1988 I met a guy during a Himalayan trek in Northern India who
called himself Arjuna Diaz (real name Ronald). I had participated in
a group trip sponsored by the Omega Institute in New York and which
was lead by none other than Joan Halifax, the haughty, Rockefeller
funded anthropologist, so called Buddhist and Shamaness to boot.
Arjuna caused much trouble for the group: falling in love with a trip
member, getting seriously sick, refusing to take medication so more
attention would be paid to him, the usual infantile stuff
characteristic of most inner plane explorers. His last words to me
at the New Delhi airport as we were preparing to fly our separate
ways were: "I'm going to Calcutta where they burn egos in big black
"I doubt there will be a pit big enough for your ego...pal." I wanted
to say but I didn't. I actually felt sorry for the guy at the time
and wished him well in his quest.
I didn't think much about Arjuna after I returned to the US until I
got a postcard from him about three years later. He informed me
that he had started a phone sex business and wanted to know if I
wanted in on the action. Being in rather desperate financial
straights at the time, I agreed and started writing these three
minute scripts of a PG-13 variety when the regulations on the
industry were tighter. Eventually, after buying my scripts, he said
he would hire me full time. When he gave me the go ahead after the
industry was less strict about XXX content, I flew down to Atlanta
where his business was. But when I got there, Arjuna was not
interested in talking business at all. We wandered around downtown.
He took me up to this revolving restaurant and tried hitting on the
waitresses-but to no avail as he appeared quite geekish: penny
loafers, calve length socks-the stereotypical computer nerd who was
about eighty pounds overweight, pony tailed-the whole bit.
"Did you bring your passport?" He asked me. "Do you want to go
A bit taken aback by his suggestion, he then informed me that he had
over three hundred grand in the bank so financing any last minute
trip would be no problem.
When we got to his apartment a few hours later, he fired up his
laptop and scrolled through a program which showed who called his
phone sex business, how often and how much money he made per day. He
made about twenty grand in 24 hours he bragged to me, showing me the
figures on the screen and then said morosely, "I wonder what my guru
would think of me."
Before I proceed with the rest of this story I'm compelled to inform
the reader that the name Arjuna, a character in the epic myth of the
Bhagavad Gita,means 'One who makes sincere efforts'. The real Arjuna
was a spiritual warrior battling his own illusions basically.
The next day we were on a plane to Puerto Rico. I'l l fast forward
to the end of this nightmare 'vacation' which consisted of me
watching Arjuna hit on the stunning Puerto Rican women in skin tight
black dresses-all to the usual no avail. Fed up with and embarrassed
by this sexually frustrated pornographer's antics, I confronted him
on the so called job position he had offered me back in Georgia.
"Oh...didn't I tell you...I hired someone else." Was his pathetic
I walked outside to get away from him-finding a bit of shore away
from the hotel to commune with the ocean, a desperate attempt on my
part at salvaging the wasted trip. Somehow he found me and sat
down. After listening to the waves and watching the full moon rise,
he turned to me and said: "What a beautiful evening....God... how I
wish you were a woman."
I got up and raced to the hotel room and changed all the reservations
to shorten the trip by a day. I really felt what it was like to be a
woman trapped by a rich man on a date from hell with no where to go.
Arjuna confronted me in the airport back in Atlanta prior to my
flight back home-asking for the 800 dollars of 'fun' money he gave me
of which I spent about twenty dollars of. Apparently I didn't live up
to his expectations so he was punishing me through his act of Indian
Giving. I gave it all to him and told him to put it back in his
sperm bank. I told him that men were jacking off into his bank
account and that I wanted nothing to do with it. He had no reason to
get offended at me but he did.
A few months ago, I decided to check up on Arjuna Diaz and did a
Google search of his spurious and unjustly appropriated name. Lo and
behold I discovered that he is currently wanted for defrauding
customers and phone companies in Atlanta through a scam called
cramming-where consumers are charged on their phone bill without
being informed of the charges. His scam was a singles hot line people
could call in hopes to find a date. Callers were being charged up to
four dollars a minute without knowing about it until they received
their phone bill.
I couldn't find the original website where I first encountered this
info. while writing this story for LNN- so I can't verify the exact
amount of his illegal earnings but it was somewhere around 20 million
I believe. No doubt he is somewhere back in India searching for that
big black pit in Calcutta or maybe kneeling at the feet of his
beloved guru, drawing upon his offshore/Swiss bank accounts to
finance his illusions quite nicely for the rest of his pathetic
life. Who knows, maybe he can buy off his guru who will take on his
bad cramming karma and work through it for him. Such are the
luxuries of the rich, I suppose.
for the most updated info. on this sleazy intrigue.
Weary of the contrived maze of intrigue surrounding the
assassinations of JFK, RFK, MLK and Malcolm X? In order to cut to
the conspiratorial core, I suggest checking out The Assassinations
edited by James DiEugenio and Lisa Pease. These dedicated researchers
who put out Probe Magazine (www.webcom.com/ctka) pay a worthy tribute
to the 40th anniversary of the JFK snuff by offering us a cohesive
and comprehensive analysis of what really happened in Dallas and
elsewhere. The appearance of this book is most timely, considering
that JFK's supposed affair with a young intern is making front page
tabloid news in the usual sleight of hand fashion, distracting us
from the ongoing dictatorial machinations of the Bush administration.
Steering clear of the kind of mythical/alchemical exegesis that the
late James Shelby Downard (author of King Kill-33) was known for as
well as potentially crack pot theories such as lizard alien
complicity in the assassinations, the editors dedicate themselves to
the presentation of facts that deconstruct and devastate such
insulting documents as the so called Warren report. I particularly
enjoyed reading "The Creation of the 'Warren Commission'" by Donald
Gibson who states out right: 'Most of the people who have done
research on or are knowledgeable about the performance of the so-
called Warren Commission are convinced that a number of its members
and counsel played an important role in the post-assassination cover-
up.' Gibson proceeds to describe how the commission itself was
kludged under very suspicious and questionable circumstances in a way
difficult to dismiss. Something we should all pay attention to, for
the very same commissions composed mainly of sleazy Illuminati Mafia
types are currently at work 'investigating' the Columbia Space
Shuttle explosion and the economic assassins at Enron for starters.
With practice, we can see how these spurious and reckless ad hoc
committees only serve to shroud the truth rather than reveal it. The
Assassinations will help greatly with achieving and maintaining the
kind of perceptive vigilance required to see through the
conspiratorial BS at large. Much of the writing in The Assassinations
resulted from the uproar following Oliver Stone's film JFK that
stated that 'thousands of documents about the president's murder
remain sealed.' Congress, responding to public outcry, then created
the Assassinations Records Review Board, which declassified some but
not all information crucial to revealing the reality at hand.
It has been most encouraging to this book reviewer that The
Assassinations pushes us all further towards the cusp of truth,
whether we like it or not. Our understanding of the 'cataclysmic
homicide' of JFK and other potential and actual revolutionaries will
be inevitably broadened/deepened by a thorough study of this
impressive work. May the editors's courageous efforts continue
unabated. Perhaps after reading The Assassinations, the American
public will pressure Congress to initiate a full-scale investigation
into Bush complicity in the 911 assassinations and various other
crimes against humanity that he has committed. It sure would be nice
to see James DiEugenio and Lisa Pease on the review board, for it
would pretty much guarantee a front page indictment for Dubya.
Available from Feral House: www.feralhouse.com
Lone Nutter News