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JJdJ Jan 4, 05: Mitzvah

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  • Irene A. Mystery
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    Message 1 of 1 , Jan 3, 2005
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      Jan 4, 2005 Volume 61, Issue 513


      If all problems could be solved so easily...

      LadyHawke

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      "Mitzvah"

      In a small town in the Old Country, the Rabbi died. His widow,
      the Rebbetzin, was so disconsolate that the people of the town
      decided that she ought to get married again. But the town was
      so small that the only eligible bachelor was the town butcher.
      The poor Rebbetzin was somewhat dismayed because she
      had been wed to a scholar, and the butcher had no great
      formal education. However, she was lonely, so she agreed,
      and they were married.

      After the marriage, Friday came. She went to the mikvah (a
      Jewish ritual bath to get rid of impurities). Then, she went
      home to prepare to light the candles. The butcher leaned
      over to her and said, "My mother told me that after the
      mikvah and before lighting the candles, it's a mitzvah to
      have sex." So they did.

      She lit the candles. He leaned over again and said, "My father
      told me that after lighting the candles it's good to have sex."
      So they did.

      They went to bed after prayers to get ready for Shabbos. When
      they awoke he said to her, "My grandmother said that before
      you go to the synagogue it's a mitzvah to have sex." So they did.

      After praying all morning, they came home to rest; and again
      he whispers in her ear, "My grandfather says after praying it's
      a mitzvah to have sex." So they did.

      On Sunday she went out to shop for food and met a friend who
      asked, "Nu, so how is the new husband?" She replied, "Well,
      he is no scholar; but he comes from a wonderful family."

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