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JJdJ Mar 28, 13: The Fifth Questions, Part II

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  • Irene A. Mystery
    Welcome to Jewish Joke du Jour! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Mar 28, 2013 Volume 156, Issue 1310 Jewish Joke du Jour Table of
    Message 1 of 1 , Mar 27, 2013
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                   Welcome to Jewish Joke du Jour!


      Mar 28, 2013              Volume 156, Issue 1310

               Jewish Joke du Jour Table of Content

      o        Jewish Quote du Jour
      o        "The Fifth Questions"
               Part II


      Matzoh... Oh Matzoh...

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              Jewish Quote du Jour

      "As long as the world lasts, all who want to
      make progress in righteousness will come to
      Israel for inspiration as to the people who
      had the sense for righteousness most
      glowing and strongest."
      -- Matthew Arnold, British poet and critic


      "The Fifth Questions"
      Part II

      11. When that computer beat those two human
      contestants on "Jeopardy!," did Alex Trebek
      comment, "Well, of course­it's Jewish?"

      12. If there were a reality show called "Jersey Shul,"
      in which the entire cast was made up of Orthodox
      Jews, would they spend all their time working out,
      tanning, and waiting for the Messiah?

      13. If, for the sake of world peace, Passover and
      Easter could be combined, would Jesus be
      resurrected and announce, "I  came back for
      the buffet?"

      14. Are the Zuckerbergs now thrilled that Mark
      never went outside and got some fresh air?

      15. If a Jewish astronaut had been the first man
      on the moon, would he have said, "That's one
      small step for a man, and there's parking?"

      16. Every time Jerry Seinfeld appears as a guest
      on Jon Stewart's show, does a Jewish angel sigh
      happily and feel a little bloated?

      17. When you proudly tell your family that your
      beloved daughter is a lesbian rabbi, is there
      any way to stop Aunt Henny from exclaiming,
      "But she's so pretty!?"

      18. If Moses' mother met Jesus' mother and said,
      "My son received the Ten Commandments,"
      would Jesus' mother then say, "Well, my son
      sacrificed himself for the sins of all humankind?"
      And then would Moses' mother take a long
      pause and say, "But at least Moses calls?"

      19. In hardcore Jewish pornography, after the
      sex, does the woman always say, "Now picture
      that in Aruba?"


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