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JJdJ Mar 25, 13: The Fifth Questions, Part I

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  • Irene A. Mystery
    Welcome to Jewish Joke du Jour! ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~* Mar 25, 2013 Volume 156, Issue 1309 Jewish Joke du Jour Table of
    Message 1 of 1 , Mar 25, 2013
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                   Welcome to Jewish Joke du Jour!

      ~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

      Mar 25, 2013              Volume 156, Issue 1309


               Jewish Joke du Jour Table of Content

      o        Jewish Quote du Jour
      o        "The Fifth Questions"
               Part I

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      Happy Passover!

      LadyHawke
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              Jewish Quote du Jour

      "The Jewish vision became the prototype for
      many similar grand designs for humanity, both
      divine and man made The Jews, therefore,
      stand at the center of the perennial attempt
      to give human life the dignity of a purpose."
      -- Paul Johnson, American historian


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      "The Fifth Questions"
      Part I

      At every Passover Seder, the youngest child asks
      the Four Questions, including "Why is this night
      different from all other nights?" and "On all other
      nights, we eat either sitting or reclining, but why
      on this night do we recline?"

      In order to make this year's Seders more user-
      friendly, the United Council on Reform Judaism
      has suggested adding the following bonus
      questions:

      1. Is the fact that Gwyneth Paltrow is only half
      Jewish really a blessing in disguise?

      2. Was there anyone in the Talmud named
      Madison?

      3. If Lucky Charms were a Jewish cereal, would
      the box have a picture of Rahm Emanuel?

      4. In a Jewish family, isn't "tiger mother" just
      another term for "amateur"?

      5. If Harry Potter were Jewish, wouldn't he have
      gone to a better school?

      6. Why does Kindle sound like a Yiddish word
      for an especially adorable grandchild?

      7. If your daughter married a chiropractor,
      would you even bother telling anyone?

      8. If your daughter were a chiropractor, would
      you always add the words "to the stars?"

      9. When Elena Kagan was sworn in as a Supreme
      Court Justice, did her mother murmur, "Maybe
      she'll meet someone?"

      10. Why do even Gentile hipsters dress like
      Yentl?


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