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THE HURTING OF THE EGO
Almost everyday we come across a situation when someone says something to us which is
not very pleasurable or we chose to perceive it to be so. In either case, we feel insulted and
get upset as a result. In some cases we react and display our feelings. In some, we don't.
In either case, the result is a depreciation (decrease) in our happiness index.
Why does this happen? It's because you have created, attached to and identified with an
image of yourself in your mind that does not match with how the other sees or perceives you,
as a result of which you believe you have been insulted and you get upset.
As long as people's perception of you matches the image that you have created inside your
mind of yourself, you are content with them, but as soon as the opposite happens, even if its
to a very small extent, you become disturbed, because you are attached to that image.
The more the attachment, the greater the hurt, the disturbance or reaction.
You could examine
this phenomenon very closely, taking place inside yourself everyday. This kind of attachment
mentioned above is called ego. That's why the phenomenon explained above is called in
common language 'the hurting
The ego is the claimant within you. Your ego claims the body-mind-intellect and their respective
functions and objects. EGO claims your worldly possessions. My wealth, my family, my house,
my children, my reputation, my image etc. These assertions and arrogations are made by the EGO.
It claims ‘it is my perception’, ‘my action’ or ‘I am the actor’, my feeling’, my thinking’, my point of view’,
and ‘my ideas’. These assertions and arrogations
of your EGO need to be governed and controlled.
The ego is often misunderstood to be something negative, something detrimental. The truth is
that the ego, by itself, is not detrimental. On the contrary, it is a potent, benevolent entity within you,
provided you know the technique of using it. Lack of control over the ego,
your inability to use the ego rightly,
renders the ego detrimental. An uncontrolled, undisciplined ego is
harmful. It develops arrogance in you.
On the contrary a controlled, disciplined use of the ego is beneficial.
It develops self-esteemed
self worth in you. Self-esteem is an essential ingredient of success and progress.
The ego in you, if not supervised, causes devastation and destruction of
human harmony within
as well as without. Uncontrolled and undisciplined
ego is a saboteur. It sabotages your career,
your relationship, your peace
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