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Re: [The Ileostomy Group] Digest Number 252

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  • Bifida affection
    Good Morning Pax, First of all you did not allienatate me. Your husband and you make a lot of sense. I was just responding to JB question and at the
    Message 1 of 1 , Dec 1, 2003
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      Good Morning Pax,
      First of all you did not allienatate me. Your husband and you make a lot of sense. I was just responding to JB question and at the beginning of the answer, I announced that I did not have children but, I wanted to try to help him with his delima. One of his concerns was in how to help explain to his son that it is fine to talk about anything at home but, that he (JB) had made the "mistake" of telling his son something else that happened to him because of a surgery that he needed to have performed and the next day or whenever, I forget the entire not now that I erased it, the entire Day Care Center knew of the situation. I happen to agree with you, when it comes to adults knowing about a persons illeostomy or any other difference that a person may have. I share my situation with my friends all the time. My situation is a bit different. I do not have Chron's Disease and truly do not understand very much about it. I have a birth defect and have been in a wheelchair and
      have had a lot of other issues including an illeostomy my entire life. I have even tried to gently educate my best friends children as she asked me to help her because her eldest daughter (who is eight) is starting to ask a lot of questions. Your veiws and the views of your husband are fine. I am very sorry for what this world has done to make people feel like they have to hide, as some of them do, their issues and be ashamed of them. It is just my opinion, that if a child wants to know about a certain situation when it comes to a parents disability or inconvenience or whatever else one can call it, that if the parent feels that it is ok to tell their child that they should be able to tell the child and if that same parent wants this to be kept in the family, they as the one with the difference should have a right, whether it be right or wrong, to request that the child not tell anyone outside the home. JB's son may tell one of his friends and the child that he tells may not
      be able to fully understand what his son is saying or talking about and that may or may not cause issues in the school and with the other childs parents. As I said, I don't have children. I just read a note that was posted and wanted to reach out and help. I like that you can teach and help people learn about differences because if we as a society can and should try to break this barrier among us then, none of this will be viewed as different or something to be ashamed of. It was not right what happened to your husband, and I applaude your efforts to try to change the system so that no one can be fired from a job because of this (by the way, that was a cool idea your husband had about the illeostomy in Walmart. lol) disability or difference. I also completely understand how it feels to go in a hospital and have no friends come to see you. The friends always say that they don't want to make me uncomfortable but, I know who they are really worried about and it really does hurt
      me. Please know that your note did not upset me and I wish you all the very best. Sincerely, Dawn

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