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Re: [hr100] Real Men/Women of Genius #63

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  • Damon Lease
    Zager and Evans. Just sayin If man is still alive... ... [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
    Message 1 of 2 , Sep 3, 2010
      Zager and Evans.

      Just sayin'

      If man is still alive...

      On Sep 3, 2010, at 5:43 PM, "The Troubadour" <thetroubadour@...> wrote:

      > [First of all, I'd just like to say "thanks"--reelly and troubly--to all the
      > many folks who've--so far--responded so positively to all this negativity...
      > ( O_O )
      > ...and who have even sent me e-mails which I hope they'll forgive me for not
      > always answering...
      > ...and to my good buddy Bill Thom for even offering to upchuck allah dys
      > whack onto his ver kewl website inna furs playce. Other than that, in the
      > second place? I need to apologize for being so late today--which tardiness
      > was because of my back porch not being rebuilt, which was caused by
      > "inspectors," which was because of THEIR having a bad day, all of which was
      > caused (again) in the first place by a TORNADO (some months ago) that,
      > furshur, wuz jus' havin' itseff a grand ol' time!]
      > Bud Light presents...
      > {Re-al men of geeeeeene-yuss}
      > Today we salute you, Mr. Automatic Notifier to the Listserv That "I'll Be
      > Gone Until Hell Freezes Over" Guy.
      > {Mis-ter aaau-toe-maaa-ti-cal-ly innn-to our In-box no-ti-fy-er guyyyyyy!}
      > Please. To each and every single individual e-mail? Your automatically
      > pre-programmed mega-corporate cubicle computer spits out
      > four-thousand-messages-per-minute just to say that you're "not there"?
      > {"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease leave a messs-sage!"}
      > And you'll return *when*? And what *exactly* are you doing away from your
      > desk until that Tuesday, the day after the holiday, in the year 2525?
      > {"I'm go-iiiiiing to beeeeee trav-vel-ling to a gal-ax-y far far
      > a-wayyyyy!"}
      > Does the boss know you're gone? Or for that matter, does "Jerry in
      > Accounting" know? Now that you have painstakingly explained throughout your
      > completely automatic message that, should we have any type of sales
      > emergency, or if the Megawhompus Hoochee-Callit Thingamabob that you sold us
      > doesn't work, or if our own firm is growing impatient waiting for delivery,
      > or if we've been waiting for your call-back since 1896, or if we have any
      > other questions, we should direct them to Jerry in Accounting until, in
      > fact, you get back?
      > {Buttttttt WHOA! Weeeeeeeeeeeee could be dead by thennnn!}
      > What guarantee do we even have that Jerry in Accounting will still be
      > employed by "The World's Exclusive Manufacturers of The Megawhompus
      > Hoochee-Callit Thingamabob"?
      > {"They commmmmmmmmmmmmme in three siiiiiii-zes!!!"}
      > And did you need to program your message to respond like this to all your
      > personal e-mails, too? Not to mention each and every single little
      > e-address of the already five-to-twenty-thousand
      > automatically-disseminated-to subscribers of this very listserv that you
      > have somehow managed to join--and read and blog to--all on company time?
      > {Ev-'ry-one's block-iiiiiiiiing you annnn-y-wayyyyyyyyyy!!}
      > So crack open an ice-cold Bud Light over the Labor Day Holiday, O Awesome
      > Pre-Programmer of the Internet's Equivalent to the Answering Machine,
      > because, really, when you do finally return to your desk on Tuesday and turn
      > on your computer? You will find every single one of four hundred thousand
      > automatic replies left in *your* Inbox which were themselves automatically
      > sent out to respond to your own automatic replies.
      > {Mis-ter Au-to-ma-tic No-ti-fi-errrr to the List-serrrrv "I'll Be Gone
      > Un-til Hell Freeeeee-zes O-ver" Guy!}
      > Bud Light beer: we don't care where they brew it; we just dig their
      > commercials.
      > ( O_O )
      > Yours troubly,
      > Rich Limacher
      > TheTroubadour@...
      > (now on tab at http://www.runrace.net/)
      > Yankee Folly of the Day:
      > The only thing that could possibly be worse would be 400,000 "requested
      > receipts" sent back by that many people who did indeed receive all those
      > automatic e-mails to begin with.

      [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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