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Real Men/Women of Genius #58

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  • The Troubadour
    [How could I possibly resist? ;-] Bud Light presents... REAL MEN OF GENIUS {Re-al men of geeeeeene-yuss} Today we salute you, Mr. Impossible-Even-To-Believe
    Message 1 of 1 , Jul 16 11:55 AM
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      [How could I possibly resist? ;-]

      Bud Light presents...


      REAL MEN OF GENIUS

      {Re-al men of geeeeeene-yuss}

      Today we salute you, Mr. Impossible-Even-To-Believe Vol-State Inventor and
      Race Director.

      {Mis-ter HOT tenn-ness-ssee cross-staaaaate foot-raaace in-ven-torrrr!}

      Three hundred and fourteen complete and entire miles, on foot, in ten days,
      and kitty-corner across the full State of Tennessee in the middle of July.
      You have got to be out of your mind.

      {It reeeeea-ly stands for a hunnn-dred times "pi" wiiiiiith-out a-ny ex-tra
      dec-i-mallllllllls!}

      You're imagining, of course, that there actually IS some slim statistical
      chance that someone will remotely, actually survive. At least we can
      remotely assume this; but, of course, if THIS is any indication of just how
      your mind does work, we'd rather actually not assume. Not anything. Not
      ever. Not in this life or the next, nor on this earth or the next.

      {Verrr-ry fewwwwww can hope to liiiiiiiiiive to tell aaa-bout
      iiiiiiiiiiiiit!}

      Blisters? Hot pavement? Mean attacking "junk yard dogs"? Please. The
      only things your wickedly concocted footrace possibly DOESN'T have are
      discount coupons to any of the local funeral homes.

      {"Wheeeeeeeeeere would-you-liiiiiiiike-us-to-ship-the bodddddd-y?"}

      And daily you report to us such pearls of wisdom as "he was happy" and
      "so-and-so was sleeping behind a burger joint"--no doubt for eternity--and
      "the long walk is like shaking a box of crackers thru a sieve." But of
      course, all of our crackers just scream when we do this, which, of course,
      is something else we've never done.

      {Sommmmme of the crack-kers wiiiith-arms-and-legs gettttttttt stuck!}

      So crack, yes, open an ice-cold Bud Light from the front seat of your pace
      car, O Culinary Master of The Jedi Pedi, because while you are
      text-messaging the profundities of your roadway philosophy, twenty billion
      shoeless and starving children are dying in China, while only just over a
      dozen are doing it right there.

      {Mis-ter Im-posss-sibb-ble-E-ven-To-Bee-lieve Vol-State In-vennn-tor an'
      Race Di-wreck-torrrrrr!}

      Bud Light beer: we don't care where they brew it; we just dig their
      commercials.



      ( O_O )



      Yours troubly,

      Rich Limacher
      TheTroubadour@...

      Yankee Folly of the Day:

      http://www.contemporaryinsanity.org/audio-video/bud-light-real-men-of-genius
      .html
      Here's the one I like best: "Mr. 80 SPF Sunblock Wearer," which today...
      might just actually BE rather appropriate!
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