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Real Men/Women of Genius #52

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  • The Troubadour
    [Does it come as any surprise now--after what seems (to me) to be like A MONTH!--that my computer is now repaired and back on top of my desk? (It s why they
    Message 1 of 1 , May 28, 2010
      [Does it come as any surprise now--after what seems (to me) to be like A
      MONTH!--that my computer is now repaired and back on top of my desk? (It's
      why they call it a "desktop" methinks.) Anyway, today also marks about one
      full year in the business of contributing to Bad Joke Fridays with... yo,
      these bad jokes. And today's episode was actually witnessed--I could not
      possibly make this stuff up, folks--by yours troubly a couple weeks ago
      while running, yes, along a "path."]

      Bud Light presents...


      {Re-al men of geeeeeene-yuss}

      Today we salute you, Mr. Extreme-Fitness Runner Who's Towing a Tire Behind
      You on a Tow Path.

      {Mis-ter weee can see YOU're an en-thooz-i-ast!}

      Because of you, we now all know beyond any shadow of a doubt just why the
      wheel was invented in the first place.

      {The fiiiiirst wag-ons must-have-all-been sleds! }

      And we shudder to think, what would that original inventor have invented if,
      say for example, he was cognitively challenged, ADHD, or even--Oh My
      God--emotionally disturbed?

      {Probbb-bab-ly an oil rigggggg!}

      He would have invented a tire to drag FLAT on the ground by a tow rope
      behind him. He would have argued how this actually helps his running, how
      it helps him to go faster, and how it does wonders for his quadriceps. All
      the sexy cavegirl troglodytes would've all been agog.

      {"I waaaaaaaaaan-na Ne-an-der-thal like THAAAAAAAT guy!"}

      But what is it, a radial two-ply 13-incher that fits on a go-cart? Why
      aren't you REALLY kicking up your fitness level a notch by mounting a
      monster truck tire on a John Deere rim and dragging THAT sucker for the next
      twenty miles? With any luck, the chain you're towing it with will overheat
      from the friction and melt away completely before you get to the turnaround.

      {"Wherrrrre are all those cave-grrrls nowww???"}

      So crack open an ice-cold Bud Light from the store on that dock by the barge
      when you get there, because, as all the boat traffickers on the canal can
      easily see, our ancestors must've missed out on your wisdom by insisting
      that their mules tow barges instead of wagon wheels.

      {Mis-ter Exxx-treme-Fiiiit-ness Run-ner Who's Tow-ing a Tire Be-hind on a
      Towwww-ing Path!}

      Bud Light beer: we don't care where it's made; we just dig their

      ( O_O )

      Yours troubly,

      Rich Limacher

      Yankee Folly of the Day:
      We think BP could use a genius like this.
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