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FI News: Dec. 13-15

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  • habarakhe4
    Dec. 13 Why did Mars perish? MARRAKESH, Marinid Caliphate The discovery of apparent animacules in a Martian rock has sparked debate among Islamic scientists
    Message 1 of 1 , Dec 15, 2004
      Dec. 13
      Why did Mars perish?
      MARRAKESH, Marinid Caliphate
      The discovery of apparent animacules in a Martian rock has sparked
      debate among Islamic scientists over the precise method of
      destruction of Martian civilization. The Wadi al-Khali suggested
      that God destroyed the Martians by flood, but the rustiness of the
      soil suggests that fire played a part. Several prominent scientists
      have called for a fourth mission to Mars in which a manned mission
      could find and interrogate the surviving djinn about the history of
      the red planet.

      Dec. 14
      Venice and Shchipria in Talks over Prince of Wied's Release
      ROMA, GLI PAPALI ESTATI
      The Doge of Venice, Lorenzo Ziani, has met with the Osmanli Caliph
      and the Emir of Shchipria in an attempt to secure the release of
      Alexander, Prince of Wied. Shchiprian Janissary-Police arrested
      Prince Alexander on a charge of plotting to overthrow the Emir's
      government and reconstitute the Christian Kingdom of the Epirots.
      The Most Serene Republic has commercial interests in the region. The
      Venetian-owned Island Hotel Company for a long time has desired to
      establish resorts on the otherwise undeveloped Shchiprian coast.

      Dec. 15
      Weak Minds to Comfort Troops
      LAUJINSHAN CITY, Jinguo
      Governor Ahn announced today that he is drafting all women and girls
      of mature age who have failed minds. These women will provide
      comfort for the troops currently engaged in the patriotic struggle
      against the Ute Confederacy. Young women whose wombs are barren will
      receive extra pay for services rendered. The government has already
      produced a pamphlet extolling the sensualness of the drafted women.
      It is believed that the first formation will be sent to the front
      near Pachinko City in the south of the Eastern Frontier Province.

      Governor Ahn also assured the loyal citizens of our beautiful state
      that the future soldiers of the "Sleeping Princess" empty womb
      utilization program were developing well inside their peacefully
      comatose mothers.
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