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9116Serious genealogy

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  • Kellie
    May 31, 2006

      You are the only person to show up at the cemetery research party with
      a shovel.

      To put the "final touches" on your genealogical research, you've asked
      all of your closest relatives to provide DNA samples.

      You were instrumental in having "non-genealogical use of the genealogy
      room copy machine" classified as a federal hate crime.

      Your house leans slightly toward the side where your genealogical
      records are stored.

      You decided to take a two-week break from genealogy, and the US Postal
      Office immediately laid off 1,500 employees.

      Out of respect for your best friend's unquestioned reputation for
      honesty and integrity, you are willing to turn off that noisy
      surveillance camera while she reviews your 57 genealogical research
      notebooks in your home. The armed security guard, however, will remain.

      You plod merrily along "refining" your recently published family
      history, lissfully unaware that the number of errata pages now far
      exceeds the number of pages in your original publication.

      During an ice storm and power outage, you ignore the pleas of your
      shivering spouse and place your last quilt around that 1886 photograph
      of dear Uncle George.

      The most recent document in your "Missing Ancestors" file is a 36-page
      contract between you and Johnson Billboard Advertising Company.

      Ed McMahon, several t.v. cameras and an envelope from Publishers
      Clearing House arrive at your front door on Super Bowl Sunday, and the
      first thing you say is, "Are you related to the McMahons of Ohio?"

      "A Loving Family" and "Financial Security" have moved up to second and
      third, respectively, on your list of life's goals, but still lag far
      behind "Owning My Own Microfilm Reader."

      A magical genie appears and agrees to grant you any one wish, and you
      ask that the 1890 census be restored.
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