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[Freedom Lawyers of America] New San Francisco Barbie Dolls.

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  • sheldon waxman
    New San Francisco Bay Area Barbie Dolls Matel Toys Inc. Announces The Release Today of Models of Limited Edition Barbie Dolls for the California Market:
    Message 1 of 1 , Oct 1 1:45 PM

           New San Francisco Bay Area Barbie Dolls

      Matel Toys Inc. Announces The Release Today of Models of Limited
      Edition Barbie Dolls for the California Market:

      Pleasanton Barbie: This princess Barbie is only sold at the Stoneridge
      Mall. She comes with an assortment of Kate Spade handbags, a Lexus,
      a lapdog and a cookie cutter house. Options include tummy tuck, face
      lift and a workaholic Ken.

      San Ramon Barbie: This trendy homemaker Barbie is available with
      the Lexus SUV or Ford Windstar minivan, gets lost easily, and has
      no full time occupation or secondary education. Traffic jamming cell
      phone sold separately. Optional matching gym outfit.

      Oakland Barbie: They are working on developing an "Oakland Barbie",
      but she keeps getting shot.

      Richmond Barbie: This recently paroled Barbie comes with a 9mm
      handgun, a Ray Lewis knife, a low-rider Chevrolet with oversized
      wheels and tinted windows and a Meth Lab Ken.

      Rancho Cordova/Gold River Barbie: This yuppie Barbie comes with
      choice of a BMW sports car or a souped up Hummer 2, Starbucks
      cup, credit card and shallow Ken.

      Stockton Barbie: This white-trash model comes in Wrangler jeans
      two sizes too small, a NASCAR shirt, big hair, a six pack of Coors
      Light and a Hank, Jr. CD set.   She can spit over 5 feet and she can
      kick Ken's ass when she's drunk. A pickup is available with Confederate
      flag bumper stickers.

      Tahoe Barbie: This collagen injected, rhinoplastic Barbie still has not
      learned that you can't wear a leopard print ski outfit without looking
      passe, even if you are actually skiing.

      Berkeley Barbie: This Barbie actually comes in two variations. One has
      long gray hair and archless feet, sandals with white socks, no makeup
      and a mutt. The other version has frizzy hair, a dingy white tanktop, low
      cut jeans and scratch-n-sniff armpits.

      Bakersfield Barbie: This tobacco chewing, brassy-haired Barbie still
      has not learned that you can't wear high-heeled sandals from Payless
      with no pedicure and without breaking a heel and falling while you
      chase your beer-gutted, hollow gold-chain-wearing boyfriend. Her
      make-up is dark red lip liner with lips covered in a sparkly pink color
      or no fill-in at all. Her ensemble includes low-rise acid-washed jeans
      with assorted colored G-strings that stick out the back of her jeans,
      a white barely-there see-through shirt. Her long, layered hair is
      bleached/highlighted and BIG. Accessories include: CD-player
      equipped with Bon Jovi,rusty old Ford pick up.

      Texas Transplant Barbie: This bitch of a Barbie comes with a Ford SUV
      (Texas plates), a  knife  to  stab other Barbies in the back, and  tons of
      makeup.  Carnivore  Ken  sold  separately.

      Piedmont Barbie: This True Blonde shops exclusively in Walnut Creek
      and Carmel. She drives her Land Rover (sold separately) to the Oakland
      Public Library.  She  has  an  MBA  from  Stanford  but has never worked
      outside the home.  Her child stroller is  bigger  than  your  house  and  her
      tennis trophies are  discreetly  hidden  behind  CEO  Ken's  golf  trophies.
      She knows enough Spanish  to  talk  with  the  nanny;   Tagalog  to  speak
      to  the  cook;  and  Chinese,  Vietnamese  and  Korean, to  talk  with  the
      gardener,  house  painter,  and  housekeeper  respectively.  She  is a
      lifelong  member  of  the  Junior League  and  her  Piedmont estate  on
      Sea View Drive  is  featured  in Architectural Digest.   Her  family  owns
      a winery in Napa, but she buys cases of "2-Buck Chuck" at Trader Joe's.
      Hence the need for the rear-loading Land Rover.Her dirty  little  secret?!
      She's  a  closet  Democrat !!


      September 29, 2003

      Bedbugs Are Making a Comeback in U.S.


      KANSAS CITY, Mo. (AP) - They creep quietly beneath bed sheets in the darkness of night, in search of a blood feast from an unsuspecting, slumbering host.

      They engorge themselves with blood and disappear with the same stealth.

      Once thought virtually eradicated in the United States, the bedbug is back.

      "An insect is living beside you while you sleep, it withdraws three times its body weight in your blood, it's a psychological concern," said Frank Meek, national pest control technical manager for Orkin.

      By the end of 2002, the little bloodsuckers had been reported in at least 28 states. And that could be just the start of a much larger problem.

      "It's still at the beginning stages," Kansas State University entomologist Ludek Zurek said of the bedbug's return. "I'm predicting it's going to get worse. Nobody knows why it's coming back."

      Some say an increase in international travel is to blame.

      Mike Lawton, a staff entomologist with Western Exterminator Co. in Irvine, Calif., said people from countries where bedbugs are rampant are staying in U.S. hotels and motels, bringing the insects with them.

      "They've (bedbugs) had an incredible impact on high-end hotels," he said. "You've got to keep it hush-hush. If the word 'bedbug' gets out, it scares a lot of people away."

      Zurek said a majority of new cases reported in 2002 - 31 percent - were in hotels and motels. Of the remainder, 28 percent were in apartment complexes and dormitories; 25 percent were in single-family homes; and 16 percent were at other locations.

      Bedbugs conceal themselves in mattresses, bedding, crevices in walls and floors, and even behind loose wallpaper. They are flat, wingless critters that are about the size of a small lady bug as adults, and they turn from pale brown to red brown after feasting. They don't carry diseases.

      A survey by Atlanta-based Orkin found that in each of the past three years, reported bedbug infestations in the United States increased. Bedbug reports to Orkin increased 300 percent between 2000 and 2001; 70 percent between 2001 and 2002; and 70 percent from 2002 to 2003.

      "That's just the calls I'm aware of," Meek said.

      Bedbugs, which are classified as ectoparasites, have been increasingly found in residences - and that spells trouble.

      While hotels and motels must tackle a bedbug problem immediately for their financial well-being, individuals might not initially recognize a bedbug infestation in their homes. Even after a person realizes there's a problem, he or she might not know how to fix it.

      "Once they're brought in, you need to deal with them quickly," Lawton said. "Females can lay hundreds and hundreds of eggs. They go through their life cycle every 30 to 50 days, they stay hidden and are very hard to get to."

      Barry Eldridge, president of The Bug Clinic in Spring Valley, N.Y., said people who thought bedbugs were just a fairy tale are finding out otherwise.

      "It's not life or death, but it's a public health matter because people are getting bit, and over time, someone who doesn't recognize the problem can become quite ill," Eldridge said.

      Zurek said the signs of bedbug infestation are hard to miss.

      "Not everyone will be rushing to report it, but if people have them, they'll know because of the odor and the sheets will get dark and red because of the feces of the bedbugs," he said.

      Bedbugs can live up to a year without a meal, they thrive in hot places and their bite usually is undetected until a person gets out of bed, Lawton said.

      "They inject a chemical that numbs you," he said. "They feed on you and you don't even know it."

      Zurek said bite marks usually show up as little red spots with a lighter red area around them. Unlike chigger bites that tend to be grouped in one area or pattern, bedbug bites can be all over a person.

      Lawton said the best way to get rid of the pests is to hire an exterminator. He said over-the-counter spray insecticides only work if everything in a bedbug-infested room is taken apart and every tiny crack or crevice sprayed.

      "Materials we use today don't last as long as they used to," Lawton said. "In the past when bedbugs were introduced to an area, the stuff used on cockroaches would do the trick. But we've switched to use a lot of baits for cockroach control, and that doesn't work on bedbugs."

      Posted by sheldon waxman to Freedom Lawyers of America at 10/1/2003 04:39:09 PM

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