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Re: [FH] Feeling down

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  • nicholeandmilo
    Hi Melissa, What you are feeling is a totally normal feeling when you re so attached to him. Moto was my first baby, and after losing my dog to heart failure
    Message 1 of 19 , Jan 22, 2011
      Hi Melissa,
      What you are feeling is a totally normal feeling when you're so attached to him. Moto was my first baby, and after losing my dog to heart failure suddenly I opted to have an echo done on him and found his HCM. Moto is going on 9 this year, but as I've been told by the vets he is a very sick 9 year old; HCM is not his only problem. After his heart failure occurence last year I had also made a plan, if he crashes again I have decided I will help him cross the bridge too, however to be honest since he's 1 year our of failure I've changed my mind. I think its important to consider the situation before sticking to a plan. At least thats my opinion and I've decided I was having a really hard time knowing this "plan" was in place. Instead of focusing on his grave disease, I've realized how important it is to just focus on life at the moment. I spend every waking moment I can with him and will even reject offers to go out or go on vacation because I'd rather spend it with him, he is a child to me.

      With all that said, I know its very easy to get upset about our babies current health, but what I also have noticed is because I am so close to Moto because of all the care he requires, he is VERY intune with my feelings. I do not get upset or stressed in front of him because I know he feels it. I know its difficult but try and only have positive experiences with Winston, it will be more enjoyable for you and him.

      I know how hard all of this is, I've been dealing with the ticking time bomb inside Moto for 4 years, going on 5 this year. I am thankful for it but its been a tough lesson.

      Wishing you the best and thinking about you guys!
      Nichole

      --- In feline-heart@yahoogroups.com, Melissa Legan <smittyhj82@...> wrote:
      >
      > I really do appreciate everyones replies on this. I know we all feel the same way. I have made a plan for Winston. I have already decided that if he crashes, I will do nothing invasive, and just simply let him go. We have used almost every drug know to cardiologists on him, and if he crashes, there is just nothing that can hold him steady, you know? We are maxed out on the diuretics he gets now, so we have already hit the ceiling.
      >  
      > The vet at OSU is excited to meet us, as Winstons case is extemely complicated, and HCM is not his only issue. We changed Winstons diet, and continue with Rutin, but they did tell me upfront that they still consider the outcome to be grave/poor. I accepted this. I want Winston to be the best Winston he can be......
      >  
      > M
      >
      > --- On Thu, 1/20/11, Judi Levens <casaobelisco@...> wrote:
      >
      >
      > From: Judi Levens <casaobelisco@...>
      > Subject: RE: [FH] Feeling down
      > To: smittyhj82@..., feline-heart@yahoogroups.com, lclarizia@...
      > Date: Thursday, January 20, 2011, 9:13 AM
      >
      >
      >
      >
      > Yes, this is such an interesting and emotional topic.  I feel very much the same as both of you.  Max is failing some, and I'm having to confront that his limited time may becoming more limited.  He's not eating much, starting to show signs of kidney problems and breathing rougher.  He's had HCM for 3 yrs and 4 months, so we've been very lucky, but just the thought of his passing makes me cry...I haven't gotten more used to that idea in the time we've had, instead we've gotten closer.  And I am so afraid that I'll have to make the decision for him...of course I would if the time were right, but I so don't want to have to.  It's good (in a strange way...I wouldn't wish this on anyone) to have others out there feeling the same things...hugs to all of you, hope something special happens today with your babies...Judi and Max
      >
      >
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      >
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      >
      >  
      >
      >
      > To: feline-heart@yahoogroups.com; lclarizia@...
      > From: smittyhj82@...
      > Date: Thu, 20 Jan 2011 06:01:59 -0800
      > Subject: Re: [FH] Feeling down
      >
      >  
      >
      >
      > Thank you so much. I have never lost a pet in my adult life, so I know this will be very hard. I think part of it, if anyone can relate, is i have grown so close to him because he is so sick. Everyday I make sure I spend alittle time, just me and him. He recently decided he likes to snuggle under the covers at night in the bed. He doesnt stay long, but its so cute. He is such a sweet boy.....and so tolerant of everything. Sure, he has his days where he is upset or tests me, but i understand.
      >  
      > Thank you all for you kind and helpful words.
      >  
      > M
      >
      > --- On Wed, 1/19/11, Lisa Clarizia Blueyes <lclarizia@...> wrote:
      >
      > From: Lisa Clarizia Blueyes <lclarizia@...>
      > Subject: Re: [FH] Feeling down
      > To: feline-heart@yahoogroups.com
      > Date: Wednesday, January 19, 2011, 9:38 PM
      >
      >  
      >
      > My Thundercat is a loud breather (no squeaking, though), and it's just the
      > way he is.
      >
      > As for the other ... after being angry/in denial/bargaining, I finally hit
      > acceptance. This cat I loved, my Baby Boy, had a terminal illness, and
      > there was no cure. Then it occurred to me that we never know how much time
      > we have with anyone we love. They get sick, they have accidents, they get
      > old. We're watching everyone we know die.
      >
      > It's so cliched but all we have is today. And with Baby Boy, knowing it was
      > going to be sooner, rather than later, helped me focus on the todays we had,
      > and it also changed how I focus on my other cats. No one likes stepping in
      > cold cat puke or having them scootch a dirty bum across clean laundry or
      > suddenly peel out when they're sitting in your lap, but when faced with
      > those little details, I remember the day will come when I wish they were
      > here to annoy me.
      >
      > It also helped to remember that sometimes the miracle isn't a cure, it's
      > finding yourself loved and cared for by a heart big enough, and willing
      > enough to pay the price for love, grief. Winston has that with you.
      >
      > *hugs*
      >
      > Lisa
      >
      > On Wed, Jan 19, 2011 at 12:17 PM, Smitty <smittyhj82@...> wrote:
      >
      > >
      > >
      > > Hi all.
      > >
      > > I made an appointment for Winston to see Dr. Scansen at Ohio State on March
      > > 23 (which will be his second birthday).
      > >
      > > He was doing okay until this past Friday. My boyfriends parents got me a
      > > wonderful cat tree for Christmas, so I decided to finally get it set up.
      > > Well, Winston was SOOOOOO excited and overwhelmed, he just wouldnt settle
      > > down. All he wanted to do was jump and play and bounce around. His breathing
      > > was awful. He was also squeaking....I call it the "piggy noise".
      > >
      > > Has anyone else had a cat that is a noisy breather? That squeaks?
      > >
      > > Needless to say, he still hasnt recovered from this....still sounds crappy.
      > > Was acting alittle "detached" this morning when i left for work. Usually he
      > > pleads with me not to go....he just sat there this morning.
      > >
      > > I am starting to feel so hopeless. I have developed even more severe
      > > anxiety than I had before all this happened.....I want so badly to watch him
      > > live, but I know I am really just watching him die.
      > >
      > > A few nights ago, i layed crying in bed and he was currled up by me. He
      > > reached his little paws up to my face by my tears, as if to say "Mommy dont
      > > cry".
      > >
      > > Is there anything that any of you have done to cope with the day to day
      > > living with an animal like this? I think I am losing my mind.....
      > >
      > > Melissa
      > >
      > >
      > >
      >
      > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
      >
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