RE: [FH] My Beautiful Boy is gone
- Hi Diana; I am crying reading your story about Happy...he sounded like such a special boy; and how lucky he was to find you and your husband at 15! It just goes to show that older cats can be wonderful to adopt too...there is plenty of love to go around. You were so good to him, and he took up so much of your attention...of course you are missing him terribly...we all wait for that awful day when we will face what you are facing now...Please don't feel guilty about anything...you should be so glad to have brought such joy into Happy's last two years...he must have loved and appreciated you very much. I'm sure there was nothing else to be done...we all have a time and he went bravely and happily with you holding him. Can you post a photo of him so we can see your boy? Thank you...and just hug your husband and keep your memories precious...you all had a special gift of two years together...Judi and Max
Date: Tue, 3 Aug 2010 23:43:24 +0000
Subject: [FH] My Beautiful Boy is gone
Friday my husband and I had to say goodbye to our beautiful Happy, the little boy who brought us so much joy after we had lost our two kitties only 3 weeks apart in 2007.
Happy was a shelter cat having been turned in when his elderly owner became ill.
At 15 no one wanted him, he had become very ill with an URI and feline herpes shorty after arriving at the NHSPCA. He spent 3 months in isolation, he was very depressed when we met him at the shelter. We adopted him June 2008, a year after we buried our two boys.
Naturally we fell in love, and he absolutely adored my husband.
When we discovered his heart issues we took him for his ultrasounds every 6 months, he was just checked in April and our cardiologist said he was remarkable for 17 years old. He was only on atenolol and baby aspirin, kidneys etc were fine.
He was always difficult to feed, we had to hand feed with a small spoon and if he ate 2 Fancy Feasts a day we would celebrate. He kept losing weight. He was 13.5 lbs when turned into the shelter, he was 7 lbs when he died.
Then last week we noticed severe wheezing and got him to the vet fully expecting his heart/lungs were the issue. Xrays revealed they were just fine, his stomach had twisted and was filled with air pressing on the diaphram. Our vet removed the air but there was no improvement, the next day it was just as bad and we knew it was time. At 17 he would not survive an operation, it was heartbreaking to watch him struggle to breathe, he could no longer eat, his stomach was swollen with air and it was pressing on his organs. He was in pain but refused to show it.
I held my hand on his head, my husband held his chin and looked into his eyes. It was the hardest goodbye I have ever had. Although we only had him for 2 years I think our time together was more intense than with the other cats we had actually raised.
The feeding and medication routines, the hours spent at home because I didnt leave him alone for long. He was a needy cat and we attended to those needs each and every day.
I am heartbroken, it's so quiet and I keep looking at the clock to give him his medicine. I see his hair on the dining room chair and on the "doggy steps" he used to climb up there. I feel so guilty, I need to know what caused this, I can find nothing about twisted stomachs in cats. I know it must be my fault, I would let him eat while lying down, I had to do whatever I could to get him to eat. I am consumed with guilt and grief.
Happy was a beautiful, kind kitty who never once growled or hissed at us or the doctors no matter how much he was poked or shaved. He simply accepted it and held his head bravely. I will love him forever in my heart, I dont think I can go through this pain again.
And in a sad coincidence, the day before we buried our boy we saw a neighborhood stray die in front of our house after being struck by a car. My husband buried him, a little black cat without a name, in our garden where our other two boys - and now Happy - are buried. We didnt want him to be picked up and tossed in the trash. And now there are 4.
Thank you for listening
Diana - Happy's mom
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