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6528Apology

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  • peteycat9
    Aug 1, 2002
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      --Dear Group.
      I just wanted to apologize for my post, "Grief Struck" the other
      day. All of you are fighting to keep your fur babies alive and I
      now feel that my very depressing story didn't belong on this board.
      I'm just so grief stricken and understanding HCM has become an
      obsession with me. It was the reason I joined this group, so that I
      could understand everything I could. I hate the fact that I had no
      time to say good-bye to my Checkers. The pain and guilt I feel is
      overwhelming, most of the time. He didn't deserve to go through any
      of what he went through. I wish the vets didn't try all their
      heroics. I knew nothing about HCM the night I brought him in. He
      was such a gentle and calm cat. I loved him so much. Please keep
      fighting for your kitties and do whatever is best for them.
      Sincerely,
      Peteycat9



      - In feline-heart@y..., "peteycat9" <Maxicat92@a...> wrote:
      > Hello group. I'm new to the board and was hoping I could
      understand
      > more about Hypertrophic Cardiomypathy and what happened to my cat.
      > My cat Checkers was less than 2 years old when he suddenly became
      ill
      > and died, of what was later proven to be of Hypertrophic
      > Cardiomyopathy. I am still stunned and heartbroken. I've read all
      > that I can on this disease but what happened to Checkers still
      > doesn't seem to fit in with what I have read about this heart
      > disease.
      > I found Checkers as an 8 month old stray last summer. He was
      weak
      > when I found him but after feeding him, he perked right up. He
      never
      > acted unhealthy in any way. He had a beautiful, shiney coat and
      > eyes. He never was short of breath and never panted. He didn't
      seem
      > any more tired than usual or weak. I had him vaccinated and
      > neutered. He now was a strickly indoor cat.
      > Then one afternoon (last month), he seemed under the weather and
      I
      > noticed a third eyelid on him. He skipped supper, something he
      NEVER
      > did before. I was concerned but I didn't think it was an
      emergency.
      > I went to bed with the thought I would get him examined the next
      day
      > at the vets. I never got that chance. He woke us up 4:00 in the
      > morning in a howl. He was panting franticly with his eye pupils
      > completely dialated. I found him cornered in a cabinet (I later on
      > found out that he also lost all control of his bladder and bowels
      at
      > that very spot). He was rushed to the vet hospital and placed in
      an
      > oxygen cage. He was given Lasix and other drugs to ease his
      > breathing. The vet on staff believed his problem to be a cardiac
      > event. Later that day (when his breathing was stabilized), he was
      > examined by another vet that listened to his heart and thought his
      > heart sounded "normal". But much to my horror, I found out my cat
      > was now blind and "circling" in his cage (a specific neurological
      > symptom). Then, Checkers had a seizure(that was controlled) that
      > night. By the next morning, I was called by the hospital and told
      he
      > had another seizure and that he wasn't waking up from it. I was
      > advised to let him go. It was the most horrible experience. Even
      > during the euthanisia, he was seizing and making a
      horrible "honking"
      > noise. I couldn't believe as I watched all this happen to this cat
      > seemed so normal and healthy just 48 hour ago. My beautiful black
      and
      > white cat was now gone.
      > The necropsy showed significant Hypertrophic Cardiomypathy. His
      > blood work was supposedly "normal". The vets could not prove a
      blood
      > clot did this to his brain but theorize his sick heart put one out
      > that caused all the damage. Here is where the questions lay. Can
      > this disease present it's self with these terrible neurological
      > symptoms and yet the vet listening to his heart picked up nothing
      > unusual? He was neutered months earlier and again, no unusual
      heart
      > sounds were reported. Even with a necropsy, I just don't believe I
      > wouldn't have seen something in this cat's behavior before all this
      > happened. I don't recall any "stressor" that happened before he
      went
      > into distress. It seems most people with these cats with HCM at
      > least had warning before the end came. What if his panting was not
      > from a failing heart but because he was frightened by his loss of
      > vision or because he was in pain? He never had any respitory
      > distress before. I feel so cheated, guilty, and depressed. He died
      > blind and semi comatose, not even knowing we were there holding
      him.
      > Please help me understand what happened. I feel like I let him
      > down. I loved him so much and cannot believe I couldn't have
      > prevented this tragedy.
      > Peteycat9
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