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Re: Connecting and Digital photo frame

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  • D
    Joyce I loved the connection thing. Photo help me keep a connection too but more typically it is a visual one. I can not remember live faces but nearly
    Message 1 of 7 , Jun 25, 2009
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      Joyce I loved the connection thing. Photo help me keep a connection too but more typically it is a visual one. I can not remember live faces but nearly always remember photos especially if I take them. Which even years and years later I can tell where the photo was taken about when, who else was involved that occassion etc...
      And the time I did visuallize my father it was in a dream but his age, contenence and the lighting in the dream was much like a photo I have of daddy. So with dad dying just as I became an adult I started taking a lot of photos to "hold on" to memories. It has helped me a lot.
      It also became a hobby and I do slide shows for friends and all sorts of stuff like digital repairs to older damaged or faded photos.
      I started out to hold onto what I had so I would not lose what little connection I had with people. Then I thought I was just enjoying a hobby, now I relize they weave back and forth and have become a strenght in my life. Photos are like fibers that hold me together. Especailly since I have a great fear I will forget what my loved ones look like if I do not see them every day.
      Dee



      --- In faceblind@yahoogroups.com, "hilsweetpea" <joyce.balancingact@...> wrote:
      >
      > My husband gave me a digital photo frame for my birthday. It is a perfect gift!
      >
    • D
      Vivian, something about your statement has brought out a lot of pain in me. I am not blaiming anyone for the pain especially not you. Please just read below
      Message 2 of 7 , Jun 28, 2009
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        Vivian, something about your statement has brought out a lot of pain in me. I am not blaiming anyone for the pain especially not you. Please just read below and know I am not upset with you but maybe I am upset with my own inept way of handling this faceblind issue i have.
        I can not believe you think you could find people willing to do just that. (I do not mean to be so abrupt, I do not know any other way to state this) I guess if I had the kind of support around me where people would understand me that well then they would not need to do that. Most generally I feel isolated because ppl do not understand and are not willing to think outside their own box to another's issues or problems. (Hense I come here for all my support)
        In general people look at me as if I have two heads when I try to just explain my "so called faceblindness". Only occassionally does someone say "oh I forget stuff a lot too I think it is age related or it is alzheimers."
        I wish everyone had your support system. What a relief that would be to me to even contemplate that I would have anyone willing to sit and talk blindfolded. After I forget who they are in a store or at the funeral home or anywhere else public they usually do not want to even know me. And I am so unsure of myself most weddings panick the crap out of me. Yes in the past as a young women I had more stamina and could do task that kept me busy and basically kept me from any meaningful conversation also. Now I am past that and just sit in the corner with a few people who are closer to me and know for a fact I have a real heart (even if they think I am crazy)
        I know what it is... I envy you Vivian. God bless you I would not remove your abilities from you but I wish I could share. I just am way past all that hopefulness. I guess this shows my pain, but maybe I needed to write this even if no one else reads or understands my point. Maybe age has finally out done my very few last coping skills. Maybe I just gave up because my skills were always so inaddequate.
        Normal people do not HAVE to do stuff like that, they can just relax and be ... normal.



        >>> I have always wondered what it would be like for a faceblind person to sit and
        talk with a friend or relative with both of them blindfolded. Would that give
        the non-faceblind person a little sample of what it is like NOT to be making the
        major connection visually? Would that enable the FB person to focus on the
        voice, smell, touch, etc. of the other person?

        If I were doing a siminar on what it is like to be FB, I might ask people to sit
        talking in a room (blindfolded) and then meet up in another room and try to
        relate the conversations just had with the now unblindfolded people (the same)
        in the other room.
        <<<<
      • vcreek2002
        I am so sorry for your pain and your suffering. Your post touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes. I will explain myself a little. Until I was 36, I
        Message 3 of 7 , Jul 7, 2009
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          I am so sorry for your pain and your suffering. Your post touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes.

          I will explain myself a little. Until I was 36, I worked as a social worker. I worked mostly in the field of mental health and psychiatry. Much of my work was in hospitals. I have developed and led many, many therapy groups and psycho-educational groups (assertion training, self-esteem development, stress management etc.).

          So, I am professionally comfortable dealing with very personal and very painful issues.

          I am also a child of the 60's and 70's. I have been to many personal growth groups, individual counseling, group therapy, marital counseling, etc. at some point in my life.

          I have been imagining how I would approach a support group or therapy group for people with PA--that is what led to my comments about talking together blindfolded.

          As a therapist leading a group, I would provide the structure, support, encouragement, etc. that would enable people to be willing to engage in such activities.

          I personally don't think that many people would be willing to do something like this (talking blindfolded) socially.

          However, I do think that many people who work in the field of mental health would be willing to do this. I think that many people would be willing to do this in a structured and supportive group.

          So, if I were working as a counselor/therapist, and you came to me and asked if I would counsel you and meet with family and friends to help them understand prosopagnosia, I would be perfectly willing to do this--even if I had never heard of it before. I would do some research and make a plan for you that would be as supportive, warm, and reassuring as possible.

          As for me, I have a poor normal ability to recognize faces. (I apologize for repeating myself so often, but I know that people come and go from groups such as this.) I recognize all intimates and close friends 99.9% of the time. I don't recognize people that I meet in a group (such as a class) unless there is something distinctive about them or until I have a personal relationship.

          The worst experience that I have had is asking a former co-worker--one week after resigning my job--who she was when she spoke to me in a restaurant. She was appalled.

          I don't recognize voices--even on the telephone--unless they are very distinctive. I don't use cues--such as hair and clothing--because I just cannot remember that much detail.

          I also cannot remember names and have increasing word finding problems as I get older--a double whammy.

          I suspect that because I know that I am not going to recognize people, I pay less attention in groups than I would otherwise. I know some of my friends talked in great detail after a bridge class about everyone in the class. They could remember everyone in the class and where they sat. The friends that I took this class with were very interested in and talked in great detail about everyone
          --where they were from, where they lived, who knew each other, etc. I don't do that. I could not visualize/remember anyone that I had not sat with or who was not very distinctive in appearance.

          I also have many coping strategies that I have developed. I am overly friendly. (Here in the Midwest, I think that I am scary friendly to most people ;~) I say, "I don't know if you remember me," to many people who respond, "Of course I remember you!" Oh, well. My husband and daughter are instructed to put out their hands and say, "Hi, I am Vivian's..." every time someone comes up and talks with us. I sit by someone I know at all meetings and ask them quietly to remind me who people are...

          Most people, in my limited experience, cannot relate to PA so I joke that I have no memory or that my Altzheimer's is acting up or that I shouldn't have had the 2nd drink or whatever...

          I wish that I could reach out and ease the pain of you and everyone on this site. I would sit with you blindfolded! I would read a book about PA--or any condition that any friend of mine had. I would go to counseling sessions with any friend of mine who needed help.

          I wish that we all lived in a better, more conscious, kinder, and more loving world.

          The support on this site is magnificent.

          Vivian

          --- In faceblind@yahoogroups.com, "D" <chat_tnchip@...> wrote:
          >
          > Vivian, something about your statement has brought out a lot of pain in me. I am not blaiming anyone for the pain especially not you. Please just read below and know I am not upset with you but maybe I am upset with my own inept way of handling this faceblind issue i have.
          > I can not believe you think you could find people willing to do just that. (I do not mean to be so abrupt, I do not know any other way to state this) I guess if I had the kind of support around me where people would understand me that well then they would not need to do that. Most generally I feel isolated because ppl do not understand and are not willing to think outside their own box to another's issues or problems. (Hense I come here for all my support)
          > In general people look at me as if I have two heads when I try to just explain my "so called faceblindness". Only occassionally does someone say "oh I forget stuff a lot too I think it is age related or it is alzheimers."
          > I wish everyone had your support system. What a relief that would be to me to even contemplate that I would have anyone willing to sit and talk blindfolded. After I forget who they are in a store or at the funeral home or anywhere else public they usually do not want to even know me. And I am so unsure of myself most weddings panick the crap out of me. Yes in the past as a young women I had more stamina and could do task that kept me busy and basically kept me from any meaningful conversation also. Now I am past that and just sit in the corner with a few people who are closer to me and know for a fact I have a real heart (even if they think I am crazy)
          > I know what it is... I envy you Vivian. God bless you I would not remove your abilities from you but I wish I could share. I just am way past all that hopefulness. I guess this shows my pain, but maybe I needed to write this even if no one else reads or understands my point. Maybe age has finally out done my very few last coping skills. Maybe I just gave up because my skills were always so inaddequate.
          > Normal people do not HAVE to do stuff like that, they can just relax and be ... normal.
          >
          >
          >
          > >>> I have always wondered what it would be like for a faceblind person to sit and
          > talk with a friend or relative with both of them blindfolded. Would that give
          > the non-faceblind person a little sample of what it is like NOT to be making the
          > major connection visually? Would that enable the FB person to focus on the
          > voice, smell, touch, etc. of the other person?
          >
          > If I were doing a siminar on what it is like to be FB, I might ask people to sit
          > talking in a room (blindfolded) and then meet up in another room and try to
          > relate the conversations just had with the now unblindfolded people (the same)
          > in the other room.
          > <<<<
          >
        • D
          Thanks Vivian... I am so glad I have this site. Your explaination of course made sense... I just do not come from a world of support. I come from just the
          Message 4 of 7 , Jul 7, 2009
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            Thanks Vivian... I am so glad I have this site. Your explaination of course made sense... I just do not come from a world of support. I come from just the opposite. Mom was severe and always thought she was was being snubbed because she was an overrecognizer.
            She thought everone was someone she knew who had something against her. She would name the person... an old girlfriend from school... a old neighbor from where we used to live. So my suffering started long ago and continues now.
            I am blessed to have this as an outlet and to learn of people like you who really care. Maybe one day... when and if I ever have any money I can invest in some of that kind of care you discribed.
            Just when I think I am over a lot of the pain it surfices again. But in this arena it is good for me because there is a healing with each pain... away from here no so much.
            Dee


            --- In faceblind@yahoogroups.com, "vcreek2002" <vcreek2002@...> wrote:
            >
            > I am so sorry for your pain and your suffering. Your post touched my heart and brought tears to my eyes.
            >
            > I will explain myself a little. Until I was 36, I worked as a social worker. I worked mostly in the field of mental health and psychiatry. Much of my work was in hospitals. I have developed and led many, many therapy groups and psycho-educational groups (assertion training, self-esteem development, stress management etc.).
            >
            > So, I am professionally comfortable dealing with very personal and very painful issues.
            >
            > I am also a child of the 60's and 70's. I have been to many personal growth groups, individual counseling, group therapy, marital counseling, etc. at some point in my life.
            >
            > I have been imagining how I would approach a support group or therapy group for people with PA--that is what led to my comments about talking together blindfolded.
            >
            > As a therapist leading a group, I would provide the structure, support, encouragement, etc. that would enable people to be willing to engage in such activities.
            >
            > I personally don't think that many people would be willing to do something like this (talking blindfolded) socially.
            >
            > However, I do think that many people who work in the field of mental health would be willing to do this. I think that many people would be willing to do this in a structured and supportive group.
            >
            > So, if I were working as a counselor/therapist, and you came to me and asked if I would counsel you and meet with family and friends to help them understand prosopagnosia, I would be perfectly willing to do this--even if I had never heard of it before. I would do some research and make a plan for you that would be as supportive, warm, and reassuring as possible.
            >
            > As for me, I have a poor normal ability to recognize faces. (I apologize for repeating myself so often, but I know that people come and go from groups such as this.) I recognize all intimates and close friends 99.9% of the time. I don't recognize people that I meet in a group (such as a class) unless there is something distinctive about them or until I have a personal relationship.
            >
            > The worst experience that I have had is asking a former co-worker--one week after resigning my job--who she was when she spoke to me in a restaurant. She was appalled.
            >
            > I don't recognize voices--even on the telephone--unless they are very distinctive. I don't use cues--such as hair and clothing--because I just cannot remember that much detail.
            >
            > I also cannot remember names and have increasing word finding problems as I get older--a double whammy.
            >
            > I suspect that because I know that I am not going to recognize people, I pay less attention in groups than I would otherwise. I know some of my friends talked in great detail after a bridge class about everyone in the class. They could remember everyone in the class and where they sat. The friends that I took this class with were very interested in and talked in great detail about everyone
            > --where they were from, where they lived, who knew each other, etc. I don't do that. I could not visualize/remember anyone that I had not sat with or who was not very distinctive in appearance.
            >
            > I also have many coping strategies that I have developed. I am overly friendly. (Here in the Midwest, I think that I am scary friendly to most people ;~) I say, "I don't know if you remember me," to many people who respond, "Of course I remember you!" Oh, well. My husband and daughter are instructed to put out their hands and say, "Hi, I am Vivian's..." every time someone comes up and talks with us. I sit by someone I know at all meetings and ask them quietly to remind me who people are...
            >
            > Most people, in my limited experience, cannot relate to PA so I joke that I have no memory or that my Altzheimer's is acting up or that I shouldn't have had the 2nd drink or whatever...
            >
            > I wish that I could reach out and ease the pain of you and everyone on this site. I would sit with you blindfolded! I would read a book about PA--or any condition that any friend of mine had. I would go to counseling sessions with any friend of mine who needed help.
            >
            > I wish that we all lived in a better, more conscious, kinder, and more loving world.
            >
            > The support on this site is magnificent.
            >
            > Vivian
            >
            > --- In faceblind@yahoogroups.com, "D" <chat_tnchip@> wrote:
            > >
            > > Vivian, something about your statement has brought out a lot of pain in me. I am not blaiming anyone for the pain especially not you. Please just read below and know I am not upset with you but maybe I am upset with my own inept way of handling this faceblind issue i have.
            > > I can not believe you think you could find people willing to do just that. (I do not mean to be so abrupt, I do not know any other way to state this) I guess if I had the kind of support around me where people would understand me that well then they would not need to do that. Most generally I feel isolated because ppl do not understand and are not willing to think outside their own box to another's issues or problems. (Hense I come here for all my support)
            > > In general people look at me as if I have two heads when I try to just explain my "so called faceblindness". Only occassionally does someone say "oh I forget stuff a lot too I think it is age related or it is alzheimers."
            > > I wish everyone had your support system. What a relief that would be to me to even contemplate that I would have anyone willing to sit and talk blindfolded. After I forget who they are in a store or at the funeral home or anywhere else public they usually do not want to even know me. And I am so unsure of myself most weddings panick the crap out of me. Yes in the past as a young women I had more stamina and could do task that kept me busy and basically kept me from any meaningful conversation also. Now I am past that and just sit in the corner with a few people who are closer to me and know for a fact I have a real heart (even if they think I am crazy)
            > > I know what it is... I envy you Vivian. God bless you I would not remove your abilities from you but I wish I could share. I just am way past all that hopefulness. I guess this shows my pain, but maybe I needed to write this even if no one else reads or understands my point. Maybe age has finally out done my very few last coping skills. Maybe I just gave up because my skills were always so inaddequate.
            > > Normal people do not HAVE to do stuff like that, they can just relax and be ... normal.
            > >
            > >
            > >
            > > >>> I have always wondered what it would be like for a faceblind person to sit and
            > > talk with a friend or relative with both of them blindfolded. Would that give
            > > the non-faceblind person a little sample of what it is like NOT to be making the
            > > major connection visually? Would that enable the FB person to focus on the
            > > voice, smell, touch, etc. of the other person?
            > >
            > > If I were doing a siminar on what it is like to be FB, I might ask people to sit
            > > talking in a room (blindfolded) and then meet up in another room and try to
            > > relate the conversations just had with the now unblindfolded people (the same)
            > > in the other room.
            > > <<<<
            > >
            >
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