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We're perfect (but we lack self-knowledge)

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  • Kim Gräsman
    Hi guys, ... What if the team insists they re already doing a perfect job? I struggle with that sometimes; I try to point the team to problems (above-zero
    Message 1 of 104 , Nov 10, 2008
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      Hi guys,

      On Sun, Nov 9, 2008 at 19:59, Ron Jeffries <ronjeffries@...> wrote:
      >
      >> I insist that you follow the XPE1E practices.
      >
      > Let me list the not so good things about this:
      >
      > 1. Teams work far better on practices that they choose, rather than
      > practices that are imposed on them;

      What if the team insists they're already doing a perfect job?

      I struggle with that sometimes; I try to point the team to problems
      (above-zero defect count, struggling to at least get one active
      work-item done by end of Friday, etc), but the rest of them think it's
      just me looking for fault and being cranky.

      Responses like "you worry too much" or "you're never happy, are you?"
      are common.

      Are there any gems of motivational knowledge that I can apply? How do
      you go about this practically, letting the team select practices?

      Thanks,
      - Kim
    • Kim Gräsman
      Hi Chris, On Thu, Nov 13, 2008 at 17:16, Chris Wheeler ... Well put! No, I m definitely much better than I make myself out here, but different situations breed
      Message 104 of 104 , Nov 13, 2008
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        Hi Chris,

        On Thu, Nov 13, 2008 at 17:16, Chris Wheeler
        <christopher.wheeler@...> wrote:
        >>
        >> One can be true to oneself and still not blurt out every evil or
        >> stupid thought one has. I try to express my good aspects. Or would,
        >> if I could figure out what they are ...
        >
        > This is probably an art in and of itself - being self-aware of the 'good'
        > and the 'bad' (I'm not convinced there's a spectrum but rather a context,
        > but that's a whole other discussion). What I found was ultimately helpful is
        > to have others tell me what I say and what I do and how that affects them
        > and colours me.
        >
        > While I use this list as a bit of an outlet (ok, a lot of an outlet) for
        > expression of ideas that can show a bleaker side of me, 'in real life', I've
        > learned to express myself in a personable and fun way that is more true to
        > my nature. I've also learned to replace things like sarcasm, pessimism,
        > impatience and cynicism with other stances, but I admit, it has taken years
        > of self-monitoring, trying to be less selfish (not that any of you are
        > selfish), being more generous with people, and even moving out of a tech
        > lead role into a more business-oriented role. And I'm far from perfecting
        > myself to look like my ideal self.
        >
        > Kim, I doubt that if I met you I'd think that you were a crusty old cur, as
        > you've described yourself and I would tell you what you are really like.
        > But, since I'm not there, ask someone you trust (husband, wife, good friend,
        > colleague) and I bet you'll be surprised.

        Well put! No, I'm definitely much better than I make myself out here,
        but different situations breed different moods, and work has made me a
        "crusty old cur" (love that!) lately. But I intend to work on it.

        Thanks for the cheerup,
        - Kim
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