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Californiitis

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  • bhvwd
    Matt, I endured a forced move to the land of fruits and nuts. It mashed my confidence and shrunk me as no psychiatrist ever could. The place is beyond
    Message 1 of 1 , Sep 25, 2003
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      Matt, I endured a forced move to the land of fruits and nuts. It
      mashed my confidence and shrunk me as no psychiatrist ever could. The
      place is beyond impersonal, it is anti biological.It is not like
      being lonely in a crowd, it is like being alone on a used car lot. I
      was always lost and began to prefer personal, physical pain to a
      continuation of the California non existance. The people seemed
      actors who were always in character. They played their role and
      disappeared into their own lonliness. I learned to study there, I
      learned to despair there. Someday I will go back and eat it for
      lunch. By now I have been to much worse places. It is just an
      attitude bomb that can be defused by being colder and more pragmatic
      than it is. Despair deeply, hate totally, become rolled steel. Then
      you will be in step with the rest of the sad actors and you too will
      fit in. Bill
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