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RE: [ExGDBd] Gay mentors

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  • Matt Mercer
    Does anyone not find it strange that BB is now taking homosexuals as mentors, but not pedophiles? Now, I know the two are not necessarily synonymous, but what
    Message 1 of 1 , Nov 30, 2002
      Does anyone not find it strange that BB is now taking homosexuals as
      mentors, but not pedophiles? Now, I know the two are not necessarily
      synonymous, but what about NAMBLA? Are they going to ask homosexuals if
      they espouse or belong to NAMBLA, or such related organization? What is
      the moral difference between having an homosexual as a mentor, or having
      a pedophile as a mentor? Or having a homosexual pedophile as a mentor?
      We can argue the semantics of the words, or, we can express concern what
      types of individuals have access to our kids, as mentors? Some would
      argue that homosexuals have to recruit. I will leave that one alone, but
      does not anyone else have concerns about BB's actions?


      -----Original Message-----
      From: pfox_exgays [mailto:pfox_exgays@...]
      Sent: Saturday, November 30, 2002 11:32 AM
      To: exgaydiscussionboard@yahoogroups.com
      Subject: [ExGDBd] Gay mentors

      Gay Mentors for Fatherless Boys
      by William J. Maier, Psy.D.
      A child psychologist explains why the agency "Big Brothers" should
      not invite gay men to serve as mentors to fatherless boys.

      The folks at "Big Brothers" won't return my calls. I wish they would,
      because I'd like to ask them a few questions about their new policy.
      I've learned they are forcing all 490 of their local chapters around
      the country to accept homosexuals as mentors to kids. You see, I'm a
      child psychologist and I'm not sure that's such a good idea.

      Of course there are many gays and lesbians who would like to help
      kids. But fatherless boys and motherless girls are in desperate need
      of healthy, same-sex, adult role models. Why? Because they don't have
      a parent of their own gender to show them how it's done.

      I've worked with a lot of fatherless boys. Many of them have never
      even met their dads. They were either born out of wedlock or deserted
      by immature or irresponsible men. Many are emotionally fragile and
      suffering from what one sociologist has coined "father need." These
      boys are desperate for male attention and affirmation. Their moms are
      doing the best they can, and desire more than anything else for their
      sons to grow up to be good husbands and fathers. Unfortunately they
      can't learn those skills from a gay man, no matter how nice he is.

      As a psychologist, another concern I have about Big Brothers' new
      policy is the issue of sexual attraction. Big Brothers doesn't match
      up adult men with teenage girls. They never have and they never will.
      That's because it would set up a risky situation which could lead to
      sexual abuse. Why then, do they want to pair gay men with teenage
      boys? Nearly all of the recent molestation incidents involving the
      Catholic Church were between a man and a boy. Dr. Curtis Bryant, a
      psychologist who has worked with 400 abusive priests, reports that
      most of those he has treated are gay (Washington Post, 8/26). In
      light of these facts, Big Brothers' new policy seems reckless and

      Certainly most gay men are not pedophiles. But many mainstream gay
      leaders continue to promote the virtues of sex between men and boys.
      The San Francisco Sentinel has stated "The love between men and boys
      is at the foundation of homosexuality." Another gay publication, The
      Guide, declared "Instead of fearing being labeled pedophiles, we must
      proudly proclaim that sex is good, including children's sexuality. We
      must do it for the children's sake." Statements like these beg the
      question: how can pairing a boy, starving for male attention, with a
      gay man be a good idea?

      I have another question for Big Brothers. Don't single moms have a
      right to know when their sons are matched with homosexual mentors? In
      statements to the press, the national office of Big Brothers-Big
      Sisters claims "all matches are approved by the parent." While this
      is true in their community-based program, they admit it does not
      apply to the 70,000 children in their school-based program
      (Associated Press, 8/16). Parents whose kids are enrolled in this
      program will not be told when their son or daughter is paired with a
      gay man or a lesbian woman. Clearly this circumvents parental rights
      and undermines parental values.

      The dictionary defines "mentor" as "counselor or guide." Certainly
      boys without dads and girls without moms can benefit from additional
      guidance. But are these children best served by gay and
      lesbian "guides?" The latest scientific statistics indicate that 1 to
      3 percent of the U.S. population is homosexual. But children from
      single-parent homes need to learn how to succeed and thrive in the
      97% world. Can they truly learn these skills from homosexual mentors?

      Big Brothers-Big Sisters claims their new policy is about "inclusion"
      and "anti-discrimination." But must we put the "rights" of mentors
      above the safety and well being of children and the wishes of their
      parents? Is Big Brothers really looking out for kids, or simply
      caving in to heavy-handed pressure from gay activists?

      I'd like to ask them, but they haven't been returning my calls.

      William J. Maier, Psy.D. is a child and family psychologist and
      serves as Psychologist in Residence at Focus on the Family in
      Colorado Springs, Colorado. Dr. Maier specializes in parent training
      and education. His primary area of research interest is the impact of
      cultural trends on child development and family functioning.

      Copyright C NARTH. All Rights Reserved.

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