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Re: [ExGDBd] Re: Let's Be Honest -- Homophobia, etc.

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  • nfttm
    yes, it is the adults that should know better but there are some adults that haven t yet discovered how to converse in a mature and thoughtful way without
    Message 1 of 52 , Aug 3 7:36 AM
      yes, it is the adults that should know better but there are some adults that haven't yet discovered how to converse in a mature and thoughtful way without resorting to name calling - they usually do it when they cannot control or discipline their impulses which usually comes from selfishness - it is more important that they take care of that empty and insecure place inside of them FIRST, in whatever way they can (putting others down), and then they have a false sense of superiority. Sad, isn't it? One way to respond when someone does this is to say "well, that is ONE way to think about it but it certainly isn't the ONLY way to think about it - let me know if and when you would like to talk about it because I don't believe name calling equates to resolution."

      woodywalker2000 <woodywalker2000@...> wrote: --- In exgaydiscussionboard@yahoogroups.com, nfttm <nfttm@...> wrote:
      > here are two other phrases ;-) it is not what you call me but what I
      > respond to that says who I am - also, the ship won't sink if the
      water cannot get inside of it

      Good point: Recognize "name calling" as a control issue. I almost hate
      to say it because I might be misunderstood, but parents have to deal
      with their own children on control issues. Only in this case the
      perpetrator is an adult that hasn't "grown up" yet. Pointing that out
      to them will only make matters worse.

      Groups are talking. We´re listening. Check out the handy changes to Yahoo! Groups.

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    • Bridget Night
      Woody, good questions you ask and Henry, I respect you more than you know. Bridget www.1stbooks.com/bookview/12053 ...
      Message 52 of 52 , Aug 9 11:55 AM
        Woody, good questions you ask and Henry, I respect you more than you know. Bridget
        ----- Original Message -----
        From: nfttm<mailto:nfttm@...>
        To: exgaydiscussionboard@yahoogroups.com<mailto:exgaydiscussionboard@yahoogroups.com>
        Sent: Tuesday, August 08, 2006 7:52 PM
        Subject: Re: [ExGDBd] Re: Let's Be Honest

        Henry, I am so happy for you and that you can experience this kind of contentment. I also agree with you that it doesn't matter if we are attracted to the masses - all God intended is for one man and one woman to love and compliment each for His glory.

        Henry B <borych2003@...<mailto:borych2003@...>> wrote: Woody,

        You post brings up numerous questions.

        Am I happy since I decided to leave homosexuality?
        Yes, a thousand times YES! God gives us joy unspeakable every time we
        make a move towards Him and turn from sin. The JOY of the Lord is
        our strength in times of weakness and temptation.

        Have I "become hetersexual"? Well that depends on your definitions.
        No I have not exchanged heterosexual lust for homosexual lust. God
        does not exchange one sin for another. As I have CHOSEN to draw near
        to God He has given me the strength to flee temptation. My level of
        attraction to men has decreased significantly. Also my level of
        attraction to the opposite has increased somewhat. One thing that
        needs to be mentioned is that many "ex-gays" that go on to marry have
        an attraction to their spouse. That is all that is needed. God never
        intended for men to lust after every woman that passes in front of
        them. His intention was for one man to be attracted to one woman. If
        I get married some day then great, hoever I am at peace that I might
        be celibate for the rest of my life.

        God also didn't intend woman to be a sexual release for man or as you
        put it a "positive outlet" for sex. We have to deal with it the same
        way any single Christian adult or teenager for that matter deals with
        it. Abstinance! Look at all the singles, the widowers/widows, the
        divorced, or even the married who have spouses with medical conditions
        that do not allow them to function sexually. They all have to choose
        to keep sexually pure. If you believe the Bible then God only allows
        sex within the context of marriage. Unfortunately today's culture
        completely ignore God and His Word.

        RE: "...only about 23% to 27% of the people..."
        I don't know what the actual statistics are. However I know probably
        at least a dozen men and women personally that no longer have any
        sexual attraction for the same sex. Most have have several children
        and have attraction for their spouse. The reason for these stats can
        be due to numerous factors. One may be the intensity with which people
        pursue God. Change is a by-product. God doesn't command us to seek
        change but to seek Him and an intimate relationship with Him.
        Some also attempt to change, but find it too difficult and go back
        to their old ways.

        Have you also considered the parable of the sower (Matt 13)?
        The Word of God is sown on different types of soil. Do all make it
        and become fruitful? NO!

        One final word. The opposite of homosexuality is NOT heterosexuality.
        It is holiness. That is/should be the goal for our lives, whether
        we experience complete change or none. I Cor 6:9-11 shows that there
        were former homosexuals in their congregation. If is was possible
        back then, then why not now?



        --- In exgaydiscussionboard@yahoogroups.com<mailto:exgaydiscussionboard@yahoogroups.com>, "woodywalker2000"
        <woodywalker2000@...> wrote:
        > To all by brothers and sisters in Christ,
        > I am on this forum, not because I'm ex-gay, but because I genuinely
        > want to understand and be as helpful as I can to others. I just want
        > to be plainly as honest as I can be.
        > I believe God provides for everyone in the struggles we all make
        > through life. As I look at the situation for some of those with SSA
        > I am saddened, but I am not here to be depressed about it, rather to
        > be encouraging. I am here to say, in my experience, as Paul said, I
        > am strongest when I am weakest, because then I must rely on the Lord
        > and not myself, and His strength makes the difference for me.
        > My self-worth is magnified in Christ and diminished without Him.
        > I have a few questions for all of you. According to some of the
        > studies I've read, only about 23% to 27% of the people with SSA are
        > able to make a total transformation to opposite sexual attraction
        > without any same sex fantasies.
        > Has anyone here been able to make this kind of a change? I'm not
        > looking for a "sunday school" answer, just perfect honesty.
        > Secondly, for those that have not been able to make the
        > transformation, how is the Lord providing for you in your weakness?
        > Are you happy? Do you feel depressed about it? What can I do to
        > help? What can others do to help?
        > Sincerely yours in Christ

        Stay in the know. Pulse on the new Yahoo.com. Check it out.

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