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Re: [ExGDBd] "S.S.A"---A easy way out?

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  • John
    Richard: Ban you..........I know you may be serious buddy, but you have me falling off the chair in laughter...c mon friend why on earth would you be
    Message 1 of 13 , Jun 4, 2005
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      Richard:

      Ban you..........I know you may be serious buddy, but you have me falling off the chair in laughter...c'mon friend why on earth would you be "banned"??? In case you didn't get a good look around here, I think you will find a couple of sinners still in the group, myself included. I KNOW there are others here that walk a better walk than I do, even with their personal "challenges".

      Let's try and find you a secure place.....any of us would help you...I will personally if you wish, try to find you a church and if you wish some counseling near you that is trustworthy and grounded.

      To Alan: If you need help let me know I will help in any way finding Richard a secure and compassionate place I will do whatever I can....John


      Alan Levering <ncxds2@...> wrote:
      E-mail me privately. Prhaps the mod team can give you guidance on finding a new place of
      worship.

      -- Alan


      --- Richard <rtz3@...> wrote:

      > I want to thank everyone for their replies. I have to say that this
      > has been boiling in me for several months. I have kept it inside and
      > told noone the extent of the hurt and shame I felt the whole time. I
      > did "walk" the night this relative make the gay gesture at me, and
      > didnt look back. I was feeling overwhelming shame and intense
      > paranoia already, and all this did was plummage me from the church
      > body all together. While at the church I was having flashes as a
      > child, and I'm not sure why. It was all very weird. Everything that
      > happened, managed to sabatoge my walk in Christ, and I have not been
      > in a right mind since then.
      >
      >
      > I have to admit out of my shame and hurt, I over exaggerated on the
      > ssa part of that posting,and overexaggerated my need for attention.
      > The fact is the parts about ssa were from my own fact of feeling
      > completely deflated about my issues with same sex attraction. If it
      > is choosed for me to be banned from the group, so be it.
      >
      > This has caused a big rift in my families, they are very
      > conservative. They try not to act prejudice, but they are, and have
      > slipped up and said things to me, and around me on more than one
      > occasion. I feel like things about me leaked out to family members,
      > and at the time the way they all were acting did nothing but confirm
      > that they had been told through one source or another. I left a
      > journal at the church one day where I was writing down very personal
      > things, and I feel like it fell into the wrong hands, when i wasnt
      > around. I will have nothing else to do with church for along while,
      > hopefully in the future i can move to another town. I just cant
      > mentally handle it anymore of this junk from people, its too much.
      >
      > I have more or less have had this type of thing happened to me with
      > two other leaders in two other churches I was in, and left because
      > of the paranoia of not trusting people in leadership in the
      > churches, but in my mind it was very much verified that it had
      > leaked out in these places as well.
      >
      > I need to you to know, it is not my conscious intent to get pity.
      > But it more than likely comes accross as pity as i was told at the
      > church that I more or less try to get pity. I will not reply anymore
      > to this thread, if you want to talk to me, you will have to email me.
      >
      > P.S. There are no safe churches in my area where I could possibly
      > go, unless i go into a denominational church. The one venture I did
      > make before I went to the above mentioned church spent way too much
      > time on condeming homosexuals. Obviously there is a big lack of
      > understanding in my area to offer hope to people that are struggling
      > or defeated with same sex issues.
      >
      >
      >
      >


      -- In Him who leads us to the Absolute Truth,
      Alan Levering; Founder, NCXDS Ex-Gay Internet Ministries

      Web: <http://geocities.com/exgaylinks> | Discussion Board: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard> | Spanish Language Discussion Board: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgayenespa | "Wounded Heart" Abused Men's Group: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/woundedheart> | Chat: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard/chat>
      Feel free to link to these pages on your own website!!!



      __________________________________
      Discover Yahoo!
      Find restaurants, movies, travel and more fun for the weekend. Check it out!
      http://discover.yahoo.com/weekend.html



      Questions about the group? Contact our Director & Founder, Alan Levering, directly at: ncxds@...

      The Ex-Gay Discussion Board is a ministry of NCXDS Ex-Gay Internet Christian Ministries

      MINISTRY LINKS!! Feel free to link to these pages on your own website:

      Web: <http://geocities.com/exgaylinks> | Discussion Board: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard> | Spanish Language Discussion Board: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgayenespa | "Wounded Heart" Abused Men's Group: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/woundedheart> | Chat: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard/chat>




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      Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.



      [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
    • Alan Levering
      You have not been making trouble here but you have been bringing up valid questions that many of our members struggle with. You have been a blessing by
      Message 2 of 13 , Jun 5, 2005
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        You have not been "making trouble" here but you have been bringing up valid questions that
        many of our members struggle with. You have been a blessing by forcing us to think through
        these things.

        I hope and pray you decide to stay.

        -- Alan



        --- Richard <rtz3@...> wrote:

        > At this point, I am removing myself from all the EXGAY groups I am
        > in, because i am hell bent on making trouble.
        >
        >
        >
        > --- In exgaydiscussionboard@yahoogroups.com, "Richard" <rtz3@s...>
        > wrote:
        > > I want to thank everyone for their replies. I have to say that
        > this
        > > has been boiling in me for several months. I have kept it inside
        > and
        > > told noone the extent of the hurt and shame I felt the whole time.
        > I
        > > did "walk" the night this relative make the gay gesture at me, and
        > > didnt look back. I was feeling overwhelming shame and intense
        > > paranoia already, and all this did was plummage me from the church
        > > body all together. While at the church I was having flashes as a
        > > child, and I'm not sure why. It was all very weird. Everything
        > that
        > > happened, managed to sabatoge my walk in Christ, and I have not
        > been
        > > in a right mind since then.
        > >
        > >
        > > I have to admit out of my shame and hurt, I over exaggerated on
        > the
        > > ssa part of that posting,and overexaggerated my need for
        > attention.
        > > The fact is the parts about ssa were from my own fact of feeling
        > > completely deflated about my issues with same sex attraction. If
        > it
        > > is choosed for me to be banned from the group, so be it.
        > >
        > > This has caused a big rift in my families, they are very
        > > conservative. They try not to act prejudice, but they are, and
        > have
        > > slipped up and said things to me, and around me on more than one
        > > occasion. I feel like things about me leaked out to family
        > members,
        > > and at the time the way they all were acting did nothing but
        > confirm
        > > that they had been told through one source or another. I left a
        > > journal at the church one day where I was writing down very
        > personal
        > > things, and I feel like it fell into the wrong hands, when i wasnt
        > > around. I will have nothing else to do with church for along
        > while,
        > > hopefully in the future i can move to another town. I just cant
        > > mentally handle it anymore of this junk from people, its too much.
        > >
        > > I have more or less have had this type of thing happened to me
        > with
        > > two other leaders in two other churches I was in, and left because
        > > of the paranoia of not trusting people in leadership in the
        > > churches, but in my mind it was very much verified that it had
        > > leaked out in these places as well.
        > >
        > > I need to you to know, it is not my conscious intent to get pity.
        > > But it more than likely comes accross as pity as i was told at the
        > > church that I more or less try to get pity. I will not reply
        > anymore
        > > to this thread, if you want to talk to me, you will have to email
        > me.
        > >
        > > P.S. There are no safe churches in my area where I could possibly
        > > go, unless i go into a denominational church. The one venture I
        > did
        > > make before I went to the above mentioned church spent way too
        > much
        > > time on condeming homosexuals. Obviously there is a big lack of
        > > understanding in my area to offer hope to people that are
        > struggling
        > > or defeated with same sex issues.
        >
        >
        >


        -- In Him who leads us to the Absolute Truth,
        Alan Levering; Founder, NCXDS Ex-Gay Internet Ministries

        Web: <http://geocities.com/exgaylinks> | Discussion Board: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard> | Spanish Language Discussion Board: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgayenespa | "Wounded Heart" Abused Men's Group: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/woundedheart> | Chat: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard/chat>
        Feel free to link to these pages on your own website!!!

        __________________________________________________
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      • Alan Levering
        If he is willing, I trust your judgement. ... -- In Him who leads us to the Absolute Truth, Alan Levering; Founder, NCXDS Ex-Gay Internet Ministries Web:
        Message 3 of 13 , Jun 6, 2005
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          If he is willing, I trust your judgement.



          --- John <tygrjohn02@...> wrote:

          > Richard:
          >
          > Ban you..........I know you may be serious buddy, but you have me falling off the chair in
          > laughter...c'mon friend why on earth would you be "banned"??? In case you didn't get a good
          > look around here, I think you will find a couple of sinners still in the group, myself
          > included. I KNOW there are others here that walk a better walk than I do, even with their
          > personal "challenges".
          >
          > Let's try and find you a secure place.....any of us would help you...I will personally if
          > you wish, try to find you a church and if you wish some counseling near you that is
          > trustworthy and grounded.
          >
          > To Alan: If you need help let me know I will help in any way finding Richard a secure and
          > compassionate place I will do whatever I can....John
          >
          >
          > Alan Levering <ncxds2@...> wrote:
          > E-mail me privately. Prhaps the mod team can give you guidance on finding a new place of
          > worship.
          >
          > -- Alan
          >
          >
          > --- Richard <rtz3@...> wrote:
          >
          > > I want to thank everyone for their replies. I have to say that this
          > > has been boiling in me for several months. I have kept it inside and
          > > told noone the extent of the hurt and shame I felt the whole time. I
          > > did "walk" the night this relative make the gay gesture at me, and
          > > didnt look back. I was feeling overwhelming shame and intense
          > > paranoia already, and all this did was plummage me from the church
          > > body all together. While at the church I was having flashes as a
          > > child, and I'm not sure why. It was all very weird. Everything that
          > > happened, managed to sabatoge my walk in Christ, and I have not been
          > > in a right mind since then.
          > >
          > >
          > > I have to admit out of my shame and hurt, I over exaggerated on the
          > > ssa part of that posting,and overexaggerated my need for attention.
          > > The fact is the parts about ssa were from my own fact of feeling
          > > completely deflated about my issues with same sex attraction. If it
          > > is choosed for me to be banned from the group, so be it.
          > >
          > > This has caused a big rift in my families, they are very
          > > conservative. They try not to act prejudice, but they are, and have
          > > slipped up and said things to me, and around me on more than one
          > > occasion. I feel like things about me leaked out to family members,
          > > and at the time the way they all were acting did nothing but confirm
          > > that they had been told through one source or another. I left a
          > > journal at the church one day where I was writing down very personal
          > > things, and I feel like it fell into the wrong hands, when i wasnt
          > > around. I will have nothing else to do with church for along while,
          > > hopefully in the future i can move to another town. I just cant
          > > mentally handle it anymore of this junk from people, its too much.
          > >
          > > I have more or less have had this type of thing happened to me with
          > > two other leaders in two other churches I was in, and left because
          > > of the paranoia of not trusting people in leadership in the
          > > churches, but in my mind it was very much verified that it had
          > > leaked out in these places as well.
          > >
          > > I need to you to know, it is not my conscious intent to get pity.
          > > But it more than likely comes accross as pity as i was told at the
          > > church that I more or less try to get pity. I will not reply anymore
          > > to this thread, if you want to talk to me, you will have to email me.
          > >
          > > P.S. There are no safe churches in my area where I could possibly
          > > go, unless i go into a denominational church. The one venture I did
          > > make before I went to the above mentioned church spent way too much
          > > time on condeming homosexuals. Obviously there is a big lack of
          > > understanding in my area to offer hope to people that are struggling
          > > or defeated with same sex issues.
          > >
          > >
          > >
          > >
          >
          >
          > -- In Him who leads us to the Absolute Truth,
          > Alan Levering; Founder, NCXDS Ex-Gay Internet Ministries
          >
          > Web: <http://geocities.com/exgaylinks> | Discussion Board:
          > <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard> | Spanish Language Discussion Board:
          > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgayenespa | "Wounded Heart" Abused Men's Group:
          > <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/woundedheart> | Chat:
          > <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard/chat>
          > Feel free to link to these pages on your own website!!!
          >
          >
          >
          > __________________________________
          > Discover Yahoo!
          > Find restaurants, movies, travel and more fun for the weekend. Check it out!
          > http://discover.yahoo.com/weekend.html
          >
          >
          >
          > Questions about the group? Contact our Director & Founder, Alan Levering, directly at:
          > ncxds@...
          >
          > The Ex-Gay Discussion Board is a ministry of NCXDS Ex-Gay Internet Christian Ministries
          >
          > MINISTRY LINKS!! Feel free to link to these pages on your own website:
          >
          > Web: <http://geocities.com/exgaylinks> | Discussion Board:
          > <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard> | Spanish Language Discussion Board:
          > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgayenespa | "Wounded Heart" Abused Men's Group:
          > <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/woundedheart> | Chat:
          > <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard/chat>
          >
          >
          >
          >
          > ---------------------------------
          > Yahoo! Groups Links
          >
          > To visit your group on the web, go to:
          > http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard/
          >
          > To unsubscribe from this group, send an email to:
          > exgaydiscussionboard-unsubscribe@yahoogroups.com
          >
          > Your use of Yahoo! Groups is subject to the Yahoo! Terms of Service.
          >
          >
          >
          > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
          >
          >


          -- In Him who leads us to the Absolute Truth,
          Alan Levering; Founder, NCXDS Ex-Gay Internet Ministries

          Web: <http://geocities.com/exgaylinks> | Discussion Board: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard> | Spanish Language Discussion Board: http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgayenespa | "Wounded Heart" Abused Men's Group: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/woundedheart> | Chat: <http://groups.yahoo.com/group/exgaydiscussionboard/chat>
          Feel free to link to these pages on your own website!!!



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