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Christa: this episode is part of my personality

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  • jose guardado
    Christa: I am so lonely. My partner is helping me, we are supporting each other. I do not want to live like this. At home I find no support. If I play
    Message 1 of 20 , May 31, 2004
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      Christa:
      I am so lonely. My partner is helping me, we are supporting each other. I do not want to live like this.
      At home I find no support. If I play christian music they regret, if I cry out of devotion they regret.
      I will never go back to them.
      I will go forever with my partner, the two of us towards Christ.
      And sending me your stuff? Please. We both need it.
      yours
      Jose

      ctickle777 <ctickle777@...> wrote:




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    • ctickle777
      Hi Jose! I replied to you yesterday but it apparentely didn t post. I m not sure what happened. I m so sorry you re going through all of this. Hang in and keep
      Message 2 of 20 , Jun 2, 2004
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        Hi Jose! I replied to you yesterday but it apparentely didn't post.
        I'm not sure what happened. I'm so sorry you're going through all of
        this. Hang in and keep your focus on Jesus and His grace and mercy.

        I'll gladly send you a couple of resources. One of the books is one
        of my favorites. I actually have a couple of spanish resources. Just
        send me your mailing address and I'll get it out asap. YOu can email
        your mailing address to me at: ctickle777@...

        I'm wondering if you're referring to your partner as your wife or
        another friend. Satan's goal is to break up your family. If your
        wife or someone else is making it difficult, or is not willing to
        repent or make changes, you may want to pray how God wants you to
        handle the situation. I honestly don't know what God would like for
        you to do in the midst of all this. You could lead by example and
        commit yourself to fasting and prayer. Whenever I really want to
        know God's will, I will pray and if in dire need, fast. Fasting
        cleanses the soul (mind, will, and emotions) and helps a person
        refocus his all on Christ. I can't imagine all you are going through
        right now. I'm praying for you.

        Christa

        --- In exgaydiscussionboard@yahoogroups.com, jose guardado
        <estudiar_mas@y...> wrote:
        > Christa:
        > I am so lonely. My partner is helping me, we are supporting each
        other. I do not want to live like this.
        > At home I find no support. If I play christian music they regret,
        if I cry out of devotion they regret.
        > I will never go back to them.
        > I will go forever with my partner, the two of us towards Christ.
        > And sending me your stuff? Please. We both need it.
        > yours
        > Jose
        >
        > ctickle777 <ctickle777@y...> wrote:
        >
        >
        >
        >
        > ---------------------------------
        > Correo Yahoo!: 6MB, más protección contra el spam ¡gratis!
        >
        > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
      • jose guardado
        Christa: It is better to speak up things clearly. I have a partner, Pablo. He is much like me, married, with a wife who is just another friend, with kids,
        Message 3 of 20 , Jun 3, 2004
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          Christa:
          It is better to speak up things clearly. I have a partner, Pablo. He is much like me, married, with a wife who is just another friend, with kids, with a gay past.
          I am here and he is with me, Christ is linking us. He is catholic, I am evangelical.
          We are struggling, it is difficult to understand but it is our way. I suppose, there are different circumstances from USA to Latinamerica. Might be the temperament, I do not know.
          I cannot play a role I do not know. I do not know how to be a man. Whenever I tried to do so, plenty of trouble arose around. Harassement, from women mainly, agression from men.
          I will finish this definitely.
          I am with he, we are with Christ.
          I regret the day I ventured into having this marriage experiment. Nevertheless, I have to go on because of my kid. He does too, in the same terms.
          I feel in bondage with my marriage. He is helping me to carry on with this burden.
          I love him, I love Christ in him.
          Thank you for the support. I´ll try to do my best this time.
          Jose


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        • ctickle777
          Dearest Jose, Goodness. I don t know where to begin. I know you are frustrated beyond words with your wife, your marriage, your lack of emotional connection
          Message 4 of 20 , Jun 3, 2004
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            Dearest Jose,

            Goodness. I don't know where to begin. I know you are frustrated
            beyond words with your wife, your marriage, your lack of emotional
            connection with her, and the stress all of this places on your
            shoulders knowing that your child's well-being is at stake.

            Before I say anything else, I want you to know that I have prayed
            about responding, and I believe God has left an impression upon my
            heart that I would like to now share with you.

            I agree with Judith, not because she and I are females, but because
            I know that God desires you to be with your wife...that is His
            desire for you. I know that for certain. When you and your wife got
            married, you made a covenant with God. This covenant binds the two
            of you together for life.

            In the first part of Genesis, On Day 1 God created light; On Day 2
            He created the sky and water; On Day 3 He created the land, water
            (seas/oceans) and plant life; On Day 4 He created the sun moon and
            stars; On Day 5 He created fish and birds; and on Day 6 He created
            His most treasured of all: Man and Woman.

            Do you know that after God created everything each day, He said, "It
            is good." EXCEPT...when God created Adam, the first man, He
            said, "It is NOT GOOD for the man to be alone; I will make him a
            helper suitable for him." God said, after all He created, that it
            was NOT GOOD for man to be without a suitable helper...a woman. God
            could have made Eve from the same dust that He made Adam, but
            instead, God chose to make her from the man's flesh and bone. God
            wanted to illustrate the symbolic significance of marriage: that a
            man and a woman become one flesh, just as they were created out of
            one flesh.

            God performed the very first marriage in the Garden of Eden when He
            created a helpmate (Eve) for Adam. The goal in marriage should be
            oneness, not just friendship. Marriage between a man and a woman is
            not an experiment...it is God's divine desire for your life, and for
            your wife's life as well.

            God doesn't contradict Himself...He doesn't make mistakes. I know
            you feel as though everything that has happened in your life is a
            huge mistake or error. I know everything goes to the dumps when you
            try to rekindle your relationship, reach out to your wife, and
            attempt to restore your relationship with her. Judith has given you
            the answer, Jose. That answer is PRAYER. Don't give up. You must be
            patient, pray, and pray some more. You're in a fiery furnace right
            now, just as were Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego (they too were
            eunuchs)...you have to believe God will stand with you in the midst
            of the hot flames! Do you know the source of those flames in your
            life? The source for ALL your problems is Satan! He has tempted you,
            deceived you, and you fell into his trap and sinned. Don't feel like
            you're alone...we've ALL done it! We've all fallen for Satan's
            deceitful ways. You can't give up now, Jose. Not after EVERYTHING
            you have been through. God wants to restore all of these things, but
            most importantly, God wants to restore your mind to truth.

            Satan, on the other hand, seeks to devour you and everyone in your
            life. That is what Satan does! He is aided by demons (Matthew 8:28).
            He can also imitate parts of God's work to deceive us (Exodus 7:12).
            He has many disguises (he visited Eve as a deceitful serpent
            (Genesis 3:1). Satan tempts us! He tempts us so we will give in to
            his way of life and GIVE UP on God's way of life! He tempts and
            deceives us all so we will sin. This is why it is absolutely vital
            that we all learn to recognize Satan.

            1 Peter 5: 8 says, "Be self­controlled and alert. Your enemy the
            devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to
            devour."

            I am going to quote some of the footnotes from my study Bible:

            "Lions attack sick, young, or straggling animals; they
            choose victims who are alone or not alert. Peter warns us to watch
            out for Satan when we are suffering or being persecuted. Feeling
            alone, weak, helpless, and cut off from other believers, so focused
            on our troubles that we forget to watch for danger, we are
            especially vulnerable to Satan's attacks. During times of suffering,
            seek other Christians for support. Keep your eyes on Christ, and
            resist the devil. Then, says James, "he will flee from you" (James
            4:7). When we are suffering, we often feel as though our pain will
            never end. Peter gave these faithful Christians the wider
            perspective. In comparison with eternity, their suffering would last
            only "a little while." All of God's faithful followers are assured
            of an eternal life with Christ where there will be no suffering
            (Revelation 21:4)."

            God gives each of us (male and female) specific tasks and
            responsibilities. Above all else, God expects us to honor and
            glorify Him. God gave marriage to Adam and Eve as a gift. Marriage
            is not something of convenience, it is instilled by God and it
            consists of the following three aspects:
            1. Man leaves his parents and promises his total commitment (he
            promises himself) to his wife.
            2. The man and woman care for one another and commit to love each
            other above all others.
            3. The two become one flesh in intimacy, devotion, and sexual union.

            These are the goals God has laid out for those of us who get
            married. I know your wife is not interested in the above goals, and
            chances are, you cannot change her. But, GOD CAN CHANGE HER. And,
            God can change you, Jose.

            The two of you (you and your wife) became one. You may feel miles
            away from her in every possible way, but in God's eyes, you and your
            wife are one. I know you are getting certain needs met in Pablo,
            Jose. I know you want that type of relationship and love...we ALL
            want it. We want to experience that type of relationship because God
            created us with those innermost desires. But what God has taught me
            over the past five years is this: He wants to meet my every need
            FIRST. If I look to get my "needs" met in my husband, I will likely
            be disappointed, because although my husband, Chris, loves me
            dearly, he is not God. No matter how hard Chris may try, he cannot
            replace God. God has to be first. God has to be the glue that holds
            our marriage together, otherwise, our marriage will fall apart.

            I am going to commit to pray for your wife, specifically. Please,
            please allow me the priviledge of sending you some reading material.
            I want to send something to your wife as well. Don't give up Jose.
            Don't give up. Cry out to God with your desires. You shouldn't go on
            in your marriage for the sole sake of your child. You should go on
            for God, so He may be glorified.

            I am also praying that God will show you, teach you, and give you a
            solid sense of who you are. I saw your pictures Jose, and I'll be
            honest with you. I think you look like a man. That is how I see you.
            You may see something different based on the shape and contour of
            your body, but the reality is that your body is just a shell that
            inhabits your soul (mind, will, emotions) and spirit. God has given
            you a new identity. The old is gone, the new has come (is with you
            as we speak). Your wife is unsure about who she is as well. I'm
            praying for both of you and for God's divine will to come to
            fruition in your lives.

            Much love and many prayers,
            Christa : )



            --- In exgaydiscussionboard@yahoogroups.com, jose guardado
            <estudiar_mas@y...> wrote:
            > Christa:
            > It is better to speak up things clearly. I have a partner,
            Pablo. He is much like me, married, with a wife who is just another
            friend, with kids, with a gay past.
            > I am here and he is with me, Christ is linking us. He is
            catholic, I am evangelical.
            > We are struggling, it is difficult to understand but it is our
            way. I suppose, there are different circumstances from USA to
            Latinamerica. Might be the temperament, I do not know.
            > I cannot play a role I do not know. I do not know how to be a
            man. Whenever I tried to do so, plenty of trouble arose around.
            Harassement, from women mainly, agression from men.
            > I will finish this definitely.
            > I am with he, we are with Christ.
            > I regret the day I ventured into having this marriage experiment.
            Nevertheless, I have to go on because of my kid. He does too, in
            the same terms.
            > I feel in bondage with my marriage. He is helping me to carry on
            with this burden.
            > I love him, I love Christ in him.
            > Thank you for the support. I´ll try to do my best this time.
            > Jose
            >
            >
            > ---------------------------------
            > Correo Yahoo!: 6MB, más protección contra el spam ¡gratis!
            >
            > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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