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suicide

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  • Stephanie
    I just feel so rejected today. Like there is no place for me in soceity. I have thought about suicide, but have never conceplated it before. I am always afraid
    Message 1 of 5 , Jan 31, 2007
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      I just feel so rejected today. Like there is no place for me in
      soceity. I have thought about suicide, but have never conceplated it
      before. I am always afraid of it being morally wrong. And well I am
      gay and I don't wanna go to hell. I definitly don't wanna kill my
      self out of emotions. Arent these just my emotions? Anyways I don't
      wanna leave Amy and my mom, because I wouldn't know how to deal with
      them killing themselves.

      But amy said she hates me and doesn't wanna be with me anymore. Maybe
      she wouldn't care, and well hates a pretty strong word, she probably
      rather I died.

      My mom wouldn't love me if she knew I was gay. Maybe soceity, and my
      family would all cope better if I wasn't around. I don't think I am
      wanted. I am really not having a good day. I am holding against these
      thoughts with everything. Because I know life is valuable. I really
      just want a shoulder to cry on, but I don't have one.

      Reason three is suicide is selfish. I need to be focusing on the
      needs of others. You know? It is not about me and my needs, but the
      needs of others. I shouldn't sit around feeling sorry for my self

      Please don't give me this I am depressed because I am gay. I am
      depressed because I want a friend who I can be real around. I don't
      feel safe anywhere I go. I want a shoulder to cry on. Please don't
      give me I need a counselor, I am going to school to be one, and the
      people that are in my profession seem so fake. I just wanna be around
      someone real. Is there any real people in the world? Or they all just
      wanna kill me?
    • Norm
      Hi Steph, First, please seek out help -- even if its a counselor or a suicide hotline, 800-784-2433. Sure they re fake, but it s still helpful to know someone
      Message 2 of 5 , Jan 31, 2007
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        Hi Steph,

        First, please seek out help -- even if its a counselor or a suicide
        hotline, 800-784-2433. Sure they're fake, but it's still helpful to
        know someone is listening.

        If anyone wants you to do die, then you should seriously question
        their sanity and get them out of your life.

        Sorry for the delay in responding. Please let us know how you are
        doing.

        Norm!

        --- In exexgayministry@yahoogroups.com, "Stephanie"
        <freestephsteph@...> wrote:
        >
        > I just feel so rejected today. Like there is no place for me in
        > soceity. I have thought about suicide, but have never conceplated
        it
        > before. I am always afraid of it being morally wrong. And well I
        am
        > gay and I don't wanna go to hell. I definitly don't wanna kill my
        > self out of emotions. Arent these just my emotions? Anyways I
        don't
        > wanna leave Amy and my mom, because I wouldn't know how to deal
        with
        > them killing themselves.
        >
        > But amy said she hates me and doesn't wanna be with me anymore.
        Maybe
        > she wouldn't care, and well hates a pretty strong word, she
        probably
        > rather I died.
        >
        > My mom wouldn't love me if she knew I was gay. Maybe soceity, and
        my
        > family would all cope better if I wasn't around. I don't think I
        am
        > wanted. I am really not having a good day. I am holding against
        these
        > thoughts with everything. Because I know life is valuable. I
        really
        > just want a shoulder to cry on, but I don't have one.
        >
        > Reason three is suicide is selfish. I need to be focusing on the
        > needs of others. You know? It is not about me and my needs, but
        the
        > needs of others. I shouldn't sit around feeling sorry for my self
        >
        > Please don't give me this I am depressed because I am gay. I am
        > depressed because I want a friend who I can be real around. I
        don't
        > feel safe anywhere I go. I want a shoulder to cry on. Please don't
        > give me I need a counselor, I am going to school to be one, and
        the
        > people that are in my profession seem so fake. I just wanna be
        around
        > someone real. Is there any real people in the world? Or they all
        just
        > wanna kill me?
        >
      • greenakakay07
        ... wrote: Stephanie, please whatever you do don t commit suicide, you are a valuable human being in the eyes of God and He loves you
        Message 3 of 5 , Feb 8, 2007
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          --- In exexgayministry@yahoogroups.com, "Stephanie"
          <freestephsteph@...> wrote: Stephanie, please whatever you do don't
          commit suicide, you are a valuable human being in the eyes of God and
          He loves you unconditionally.. I know you may be overwhelmed by
          feelings of guilt and rejection.. But that is not what God wants for
          you. I also know you probably feel rejected by your family as well.
          It is good that you are able to express your feelings though but
          remember it is not wrong for you to get help to resolve these
          feelings and it is nothing to be ashamed of..1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-
          2433)

          1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255),also http://www.suicide.org/suicide-
          hotlines.html a glbt(gay,lesbian,bisexual, transgender)suicide
          hotline is 1-866-4-U-TREVOR

          Suicide Prevention Lines
          You may call these suicide prevention numbers from anywhere in the
          United States, 24 hours a day. People are waiting to help you. Call a
          suicide prevention number right now if you need to. And always
          remember that it is never okay to act on your thoughts of suicide.
          Never. Again, call a suicide prevention number now if you need to.

          Never act on your thoughts of suicide.
          Extensive suicide prevention hotline numbers, categorized by country
          or state, can be found on the Suicide Prevention Hotlines pages of
          this web site. Go to the Suicide Prevention Hotlines index page now
          if you need to.
          Suicide is never the answer.
          Getting help is the answer.

          ----------------------------------------------------------------------
          ----------


          If you do not need to call any of the suicide prevention numbers
          above, then please read on. . .

          Welcome, my friend, you are not alone. I am very pleased that you are
          here. And let me remind you that there is nothing more important than
          your life. Nothing.

          My name is Kevin Caruso, and I have been working with suicidal people
          for over 30 years; and I have been firmly dedicated to suicide
          prevention, awareness, and support, so please let me share my
          experience with you. The first thing that I want you to know is that
          virtually every person that I have worked with who attempted suicide,
          and survived, was glad that they lived. So the emotions that were
          causing the suicidal feelings did pass. Things got better; the sun
          did come out. So, let me extend that hope to you.

          If you are in intense emotional and/or physical pain, remember that
          your judgment is being clouded by that pain. If you are considering
          suicide, you are trying to end that pain. Please do not confuse
          ending your pain with ending your life. The two are very different.


          >
          > I just feel so rejected today. Like there is no place for me in
          > soceity. I have thought about suicide, but have never conceplated
          it
          > before. I am always afraid of it being morally wrong. And well I am
          > gay and I don't wanna go to hell. I definitly don't wanna kill my
          > self out of emotions. Arent these just my emotions? Anyways I don't
          > wanna leave Amy and my mom, because I wouldn't know how to deal
          with
          > them killing themselves.
          >
          > But amy said she hates me and doesn't wanna be with me anymore.
          Maybe
          > she wouldn't care, and well hates a pretty strong word, she
          probably
          > rather I died.
          >
          > My mom wouldn't love me if she knew I was gay. Maybe soceity, and
          my
          > family would all cope better if I wasn't around. I don't think I am
          > wanted. I am really not having a good day. I am holding against
          these
          > thoughts with everything. Because I know life is valuable. I really
          > just want a shoulder to cry on, but I don't have one.
          >
          > Reason three is suicide is selfish. I need to be focusing on the
          > needs of others. You know? It is not about me and my needs, but the
          > needs of others. I shouldn't sit around feeling sorry for my self
          >
          > Please don't give me this I am depressed because I am gay. I am
          > depressed because I want a friend who I can be real around. I don't
          > feel safe anywhere I go. I want a shoulder to cry on. Please don't
          > give me I need a counselor, I am going to school to be one, and the
          > people that are in my profession seem so fake. I just wanna be
          around
          > someone real. Is there any real people in the world? Or they all
          just
          > wanna kill me?
          >
        • greenakakay07
          ... but I ve had similar feelings like yours... And if none of these hotlines work for you , I will do what I can to see what other resources are available to
          Message 4 of 5 , Feb 8, 2007
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            --- In exexgayministry@yahoogroups.com, "Stephanie"
            <freestephsteph@...> wrote:
            > Hey, talk to me if you need to, bend my ear.. I'm an old lady of 46
            but I've had similar feelings like yours... And if none of these
            hotlines work for you , I will do what I can to see what other
            resources are available to help you..Right mow I think what you want
            is someone who will listen and support you and that is okay to ask
            for help and support.
            > I just feel so rejected today. Like there is no place for me in
            > soceity. I have thought about suicide, but have never conceplated
            it
            > before. I am always afraid of it being morally wrong. And well I am
            > gay and I don't wanna go to hell. I definitly don't wanna kill my
            > self out of emotions. Arent these just my emotions? Anyways I don't
            > wanna leave Amy and my mom, because I wouldn't know how to deal
            with
            > them killing themselves.
            >
            > But amy said she hates me and doesn't wanna be with me anymore.
            Maybe
            > she wouldn't care, and well hates a pretty strong word, she
            probably
            > rather I died.
            >
            > My mom wouldn't love me if she knew I was gay. Maybe soceity, and
            my
            > family would all cope better if I wasn't around. I don't think I am
            > wanted. I am really not having a good day. I am holding against
            these
            > thoughts with everything. Because I know life is valuable. I really
            > just want a shoulder to cry on, but I don't have one.
            >
            > Reason three is suicide is selfish. I need to be focusing on the
            > needs of others. You know? It is not about me and my needs, but the
            > needs of others. I shouldn't sit around feeling sorry for my self
            >
            > Please don't give me this I am depressed because I am gay. I am
            > depressed because I want a friend who I can be real around. I don't
            > feel safe anywhere I go. I want a shoulder to cry on. Please don't
            > give me I need a counselor, I am going to school to be one, and the
            > people that are in my profession seem so fake. I just wanna be
            around
            > someone real. Is there any real people in the world? Or they all
            just
            > wanna kill me?
            >
          • stephanie anderson
            I do not feel guilty!! Just because I am gay doesn t mean that I feel guilty.
            Message 5 of 5 , Feb 9, 2007
            • 0 Attachment
              <<<. I know you may be overwhelmed by
              feelings of guilt and rejection.. >>>>

              I do not feel guilty!! Just because I am gay doesn't mean that I feel guilty. Don't try to assume you know how i feel. Rejected yes! I have to be someone everyone else is happy with.


              ----- Original Message ----
              From: greenakakay07 <greenakakay07@...>
              To: exexgayministry@yahoogroups.com
              Sent: Thursday, February 8, 2007 2:33:28 AM
              Subject: [ExExGayMinistry] Re: suicide

              --- In exexgayministry@ yahoogroups. com, "Stephanie"
              <freestephsteph@ ...> wrote: Stephanie, please whatever you do don't
              commit suicide, you are a valuable human being in the eyes of God and
              He loves you unconditionally. . I know you may be overwhelmed by
              feelings of guilt and rejection.. But that is not what God wants for
              you. I also know you probably feel rejected by your family as well.
              It is good that you are able to express your feelings though but
              remember it is not wrong for you to get help to resolve these
              feelings and it is nothing to be ashamed of..1-800-SUICIDE (1-800-784-
              2433)

              1-800-273-TALK (1-800-273-8255) ,also http://www.suicide org/suicide-
              hotlines.html a glbt(gay,lesbian, bisexual, transgender) suicide
              hotline is 1-866-4-U-TREVOR

              Suicide Prevention Lines
              You may call these suicide prevention numbers from anywhere in the
              United States, 24 hours a day. People are waiting to help you. Call a
              suicide prevention number right now if you need to. And always
              remember that it is never okay to act on your thoughts of suicide.
              Never. Again, call a suicide prevention number now if you need to.

              Never act on your thoughts of suicide.
              Extensive suicide prevention hotline numbers, categorized by country
              or state, can be found on the Suicide Prevention Hotlines pages of
              this web site. Go to the Suicide Prevention Hotlines index page now
              if you need to.
              Suicide is never the answer.
              Getting help is the answer.

              ------------ --------- --------- --------- --------- --------- -
              ----------

              If you do not need to call any of the suicide prevention numbers
              above, then please read on. . .

              Welcome, my friend, you are not alone. I am very pleased that you are
              here. And let me remind you that there is nothing more important than
              your life. Nothing.

              My name is Kevin Caruso, and I have been working with suicidal people
              for over 30 years; and I have been firmly dedicated to suicide
              prevention, awareness, and support, so please let me share my
              experience with you. The first thing that I want you to know is that
              virtually every person that I have worked with who attempted suicide,
              and survived, was glad that they lived. So the emotions that were
              causing the suicidal feelings did pass. Things got better; the sun
              did come out. So, let me extend that hope to you.

              If you are in intense emotional and/or physical pain, remember that
              your judgment is being clouded by that pain. If you are considering
              suicide, you are trying to end that pain. Please do not confuse
              ending your pain with ending your life. The two are very different.

              >
              > I just feel so rejected today. Like there is no place for me in
              > soceity. I have thought about suicide, but have never conceplated
              it
              > before. I am always afraid of it being morally wrong. And well I am
              > gay and I don't wanna go to hell. I definitly don't wanna kill my
              > self out of emotions. Arent these just my emotions? Anyways I don't
              > wanna leave Amy and my mom, because I wouldn't know how to deal
              with
              > them killing themselves.
              >
              > But amy said she hates me and doesn't wanna be with me anymore.
              Maybe
              > she wouldn't care, and well hates a pretty strong word, she
              probably
              > rather I died.
              >
              > My mom wouldn't love me if she knew I was gay. Maybe soceity, and
              my
              > family would all cope better if I wasn't around. I don't think I am
              > wanted. I am really not having a good day. I am holding against
              these
              > thoughts with everything. Because I know life is valuable. I really
              > just want a shoulder to cry on, but I don't have one.
              >
              > Reason three is suicide is selfish. I need to be focusing on the
              > needs of others. You know? It is not about me and my needs, but the
              > needs of others. I shouldn't sit around feeling sorry for my self
              >
              > Please don't give me this I am depressed because I am gay. I am
              > depressed because I want a friend who I can be real around. I don't
              > feel safe anywhere I go. I want a shoulder to cry on. Please don't
              > give me I need a counselor, I am going to school to be one, and the
              > people that are in my profession seem so fake. I just wanna be
              around
              > someone real. Is there any real people in the world? Or they all
              just
              > wanna kill me?
              >






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