Loading ...
Sorry, an error occurred while loading the content.
 

Re: Digest Number 806

Expand Messages
  • colleenmft
    I wanted to clarify my words and yours, here, so there would not be an misunderstanding of who wrote what.... ... that missing part ... what made Eck ...
    Message 1 of 3 , Jan 8, 2004
      I wanted to clarify my words and yours, here, so there would not be
      an misunderstanding of who wrote what....

      Colleen's words:
      --- In eckankartruth@yahoogroups.com, jd4751@a... wrote:
      > In a message dated 1/8/2004 3:59:47 PM Central Standard Time,
      > eckankartruth@yahoogroups.com writes:
      > From: colleen russell <colleenmft@y...>
      > Subject: Re: RE: Self realization
      >
      > I've read that book as well, and it is very good.
      >
      > Not only adoptees are looking for their "missing
      > part", of course. I definitely was looking for family
      > and truly believed I found it in our Los Angeles
      > eckankar community. I felt a lot of warmth, but it
      > was not unconditional love as we all were led to
      > believe. It was absolutely conditional based on how
      > much we were in agreement with Twitchell's ideas and
      > values. Such a narcissistic system, if you ask me.
      > My mother died when I was 15 and just four years later
      > I joined eckankar. When you think of having "the
      > presence of the master", as we were told, and this
      > omnipotent, omnipresent, totally God-enlightened being
      > by your side with the promise "I will never leave
      > you", it appears to be the finding of the all-loving,
      > "good" mother for which many of us search and long at
      > some stage in our development until finally, through
      > whatever it takes, we may realize the fantasy and find
      > the hole is filling up, inside.
      >
      > The author of Journey of the Adopted Self, an adoptee,
      > is also a psychotherapist like Nancy Verrier. I'm now
      > specializing in cult awareness and recovery in my
      > private practice (I'm a licensed marriage and family
      > therapist). It's worthwhile to work with what one has
      > experienced on a professional basis."

      John's words:
      > I agree that Eckankar seemed to fill a void in my life,
      that "missing" part
      > of myself, in the early years I was involved with Eck, and that's
      what made Eck
      > so attractive. I thought I had found the keys to the universe! I
      remember an
      > experience I had when Darwin was still the LEM. I woke up in the
      middle of
      > the night, but realized I was in a hyper aware state (not
      physically awake) and
      > Darwin came to my bedside, walking out of a brilliant blue light,
      and knelt
      > down and whispered something in my ear. I could not hear what he
      was saying but
      > at that moment I experienced the most incredible peace and love I
      have ever
      > felt in my life. The after glow from this experience lasted
      several days. I
      > cannot explain the experience. I don't know if I wanted that
      experience so
      > much that I created it, or somehow reached the divine within, or
      what. I only
      > know I felt the most complete peace and love I had ever felt and
      I've not had
      > that feeling since. There is no drug or substance that could
      could come close to
      > recreating that in my opinion. (no, I was not using any mild
      altering
      > substance). I know I would probably benefit from seeing a
      professional therapist in
      > trying to fill this hole left by the "primal wound" and intend to
      do so. My
      > problem is that I have a pathological need to "figure it out" and
      I make myself
      > crazy in the process of trying. Eckankar seemed to provide some
      very
      > convenient answers for me at the time and I think I veiwed the
      LEM as the fantasy,
      > all loving "Good mother" so to speak. The one who would never
      leave me, who
      > would always be by my side. I think I have finally realized the
      fantasy of this
      > but have a long way to go to close the hole. In the end it all
      boils down to
      > acceptance I think. I have a very long way to go in that dept.
      too.
      >
      > John
      >
      >
      > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
    • colleenmft
      John and All, Your experience, John, according to my perception, could very well have been your own creation, from what information you consciously and
      Message 2 of 3 , Jan 9, 2004
        John and All,

        Your experience, John, according to my perception, could very well
        have been your own creation, from what information you consciously
        and unconsciously gathered while involved in eckankar. I believe
        that what it meant to you was important and "real"...a gift, for
        sure but from a symbolic sense. I do not credit Twitchell/Gross or
        anyone outside yourself for that experience. To me, they were just
        players in the dream or "vision", "real" and meaningful to what you
        gained from it. Perhaps you merged with aspects of yourself.

        Knowledge about the psyche is so limited in eckankar, I believe. To
        appreciate the richness, complexity, and commonality of the psyche,
        including the interconnectedness from culture to culture, the late
        Joseph Campbell offers much. Have others here seen the Video
        series, available in many video stores, of the Bill Moyer Interviews
        with Joseph Campbell? I highly recommend viewing these. In no way
        is Joseph Campbell "guru-like"; he appears as a very wise, loving,
        intelligent, tolerant, and creative human being. I have a cassette
        tape of Campbell being interviewed on the radio...he speaks quite a
        lot about cults. One of the points he made is that he didn't
        believe that anyone could have the transformation and/or self-
        realization or god-realization he/she sought within the structure of
        cults because of their limitations. He also spoke often of "The
        Hero's Journey," akin to the individual journey through the "dark
        forest" to survive through the threats and obstacles and to find
        one's "bliss" or truth...to be authentic.

        I've given up pushing for the answers or for trying hard in finding
        my bliss...I'm for appreciating the present, and responding to it.
        Can't do any more, really...
        In this regard, the Buddhist approach seems right on to me.

        Good chats!
        Colleen

        --- In eckankartruth@yahoogroups.com, jd4751@a... wrote:
        "... Eckankar seemed to fill a void in my life, that "missing" part
        > of myself, in the early years I was involved with Eck, and that's
        what made Eck
        > so attractive. I thought I had found the keys to the universe! I
        remember an
        > experience I had when Darwin was still the LEM. I woke up in the
        middle of
        > the night, but realized I was in a hyper aware state (not
        physically awake) and
        > Darwin came to my bedside, walking out of a brilliant blue light,
        and knelt
        > down and whispered something in my ear. I could not hear what he
        was saying but
        > at that moment I experienced the most incredible peace and love I
        have ever
        > felt in my life. The after glow from this experience lasted
        several days. I
        > cannot explain the experience. I don't know if I wanted that
        experience so
        > much that I created it, or somehow reached the divine within, or
        what. I only
        > know I felt the most complete peace and love I had ever felt and
        I've not had
        > that feeling since. There is no drug or substance that could
        could come close to
        > recreating that in my opinion. (no, I was not using any mild
        altering
        > substance). I know I would probably benefit from seeing a
        professional therapist in
        > trying to fill this hole left by the "primal wound" and intend to
        do so. My
        > problem is that I have a pathological need to "figure it out" and
        I make myself
        > crazy in the process of trying. Eckankar seemed to provide some
        very
        > convenient answers for me at the time and I think I veiwed the
        LEM as the fantasy,
        > all loving "Good mother" so to speak. The one who would never
        leave me, who
        > would always be by my side. I think I have finally realized the
        fantasy of this
        > but have a long way to go to close the hole. In the end it all
        boils down to
        > acceptance I think. I have a very long way to go in that dept.
        too.
        >
        > John
        >
        >
        > [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
      Your message has been successfully submitted and would be delivered to recipients shortly.