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Re: [cyber_magic_library] homage

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  • Ashok Bhandari
    Good one dear keep it up a new wave in magic is required to keep the magic flag flying best wishes ... -- Wonderking Ashok Bhandari www.indianmagician.in +91
    Message 1 of 1 , Oct 5, 2007
      Good one dear keep it up a new wave in magic is required to keep the
      magic flag flying best wishes

      On 10/4/07, lockedassistant <lockedassistant@...> wrote:
      > I wrote this message on sawingcelebritiesinhalf, in rebellion
      > against spam messages. I repeat it here, now.
      > I want to dedicate this little dream to Ms Tiger, Amber and Lynx,
      > because of their tastes of magic (Petra and Zilvara: wait your turn!
      > You'll have news soon). Well, this is another "saws and
      > blades and divisions" story, but there is time for other, though.
      > So, let's start!
      > "The audience is waiting, in the dark... Lights on... the show has
      > begun!!
      > They see a railroad, in the middle a thin model with the shape of a
      > train.
      > The magician comes on stage. Instead of a station master, as people
      > could think, he's dressed like a contest judge.
      > "Welcome, audience, to the fight of the year!! At my left, a
      > powerful old style sawmill is anxious to smash its adversary, its
      > teeth are shaper than ever. At my right, a new type of circular saw,
      > no teeth but a singular sharp circle, is waiting for its first
      > match. They're collocated on the railroad, engines ready. And now,
      > you know, this is a fight for the choose of the best machinery for
      > sawing a woman in half. So, people, let's make an applause for our
      > battle field, my assistant!!"
      > Walking trought applauses, the gorgeus assistant reaches the
      > magician. Smart and cool, awesome and wealthy, I ever haven't seen
      > a "field" like that...
      > The magician grabs the "field", and goes to the opened thin model.
      > She wakes up on the table, and then sits down inside. Her neck is
      > locked at a side, her feet are trapped at the other. Her hands are
      > cuffes over holes on the upper side of the upper part of the
      > illusion. All is complete.
      > "So, audience, the battle is near to begin. Engines started, I'll
      > leave the honour to sanction the beginning of the match to my
      > assistant!" He puts the microphone near her mouth. And the lady,
      > lips attached to the microphone like a singer, says: "3, 2, my
      > gosh.. 1... GO!!"
      > The roaring saws begin their approach to the field, fulling the air
      > with their sound. They march like beasts that study each other
      > before attacking. They're near to the "field", whose heartbeats
      > invade her ears more than the blades' squeaks.
      > "Ladies and gentlemen, they're arrived on the "field"!! Her abdomen
      > is easily sliced, thanks to the rotation speed of the saws. Just a
      > second before the real match...
      > It's begun! The decision to lock the thin model to the ground seems
      > a good one. The ground is vibrating since here, I can't imagine what
      > our brave field is feeling. The fight continues merciless, sparks
      > begin to appear. I'll try to catch the impressions of the "field"."
      > He puts the microphone near her mouth, and over the twirling of the
      > saws people hear this: "OHHH...oooooo-hhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!".
      > "Ladies and gentlemen, the fight seems to be near to the end!! In a
      > sea of sparks, our contenders seem to fuse each other... but look!
      > The truth is another! The old style sawmill has confirmed its
      > supremacy on the too confident new type!! Look!! That's incredible!!
      > It seems I don't need of metal dividers for the train sawing!! The
      > sawmill's adversary has been sliced in 2, just like my lovely
      > assistant!". And this is how he does: removing the winner from the
      > field, and unlocking the loser from its engine and the thin model to
      > the floor, the beautiful "field" is finally splitted, and her halves
      > are reversed in a magic alternative to yoga's touching the head with
      > feet. The contact with her barefeet, cold for the tension, reveals
      > an effect. In front of a videocamera, her face is shown to the
      > audience with a screen, she appeared happily unconscious. Now
      > conscious of her state, she plays with her feet, caressing her own
      > cheecks with them. The magician's question: "So, how do you feel?".
      > ---- I left the response to my friends-------
      > The time to restore the "battlefield" has come. The magician runs
      > and joins her halves, then carefully remove the pieces of the loser
      > saw outside the assistant and the thin model. Hands, feet and neck
      > are unlocked, and with a last charge of adrenaline, the gorgeus
      > assistant raises, shaking a little.
      > The applause is a little, but appreciate prize. Applauses after
      > applauses, assistant and magician quit.
      > Another show is near to start..."
      > So, ladies and gentlemen, this is my story. I just hope I haven't
      > done serious language mistakes. And you, readers, could amuse it.

      Wonderking Ashok Bhandari
      +91 9810080679

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