Re: What am i doing wrong?
- My husband (a lifelong Catholic) suffers from these same kinds of
feelings. I believe that he is scrupulous, and that may be your
problem as well. A scrupulous person sees mortal sin where none
exists. For a mortal sin to occur, there are three conditions: grave
matter, full knowledge and free consent of the will. Stubbing your
toe and using the Lord's name in vain is not a mortal sin. In all
likelihood, the shock from the pain removes your free consent. Also,
habit usually also lessons your free consent. So if you have a sin
you have committed for years and are struggling to overcome it, if
you fail that is not necessarily a mortal sin.
The best thing to do is to find a good holy priest to use as a
confessor and spiritual director. Take his advice. Go only to
confession to him. He will probably tell you not to go to confession
more often than every two weeks. Listen when he tells you what is
sinful and what is not. Scrupulosity is a common problem. The Church
ought to offer peace, not anxiety. Your journey from a sinful
wretched being to a perfect glorified being is a long one, and will
only be completed after your death. Remember that the Lord came to
suffer and die for you, and He established His Church to give you
that grace. Trust in His merciful love!