Loading ...
Sorry, an error occurred while loading the content.

Just in from Nashville - Music City USA to celebrate Car Full Day on April 19th

Expand Messages
  • eric.britton@ecoplan.org
    For Release: Midnight, March 27, 2001(Nashville time) GESOVOOSASTD World HQ, Nashville Tennessee Contact: Native at gesovoosastd@ecoplan.org GESOVOOSASTD:
    Message 1 of 1 , Mar 28, 2001
    • 0 Attachment
      For Release: Midnight, March 27, 2001(Nashville time)
      GESOVOOSASTD World HQ, Nashville Tennessee
      Contact: Native at gesovoosastd@...

      GESOVOOSASTD: Music City USA Native Challenges World with Car-Full Day

      Native of city offers "Car Full Day" proposal and Cure-all for Nashville and
      the World

      "Get-Every-Single-Operating-Vehicle-Out-On-Street-At-The-Same-Time Day"

      Dear Fellow Citizens and Fellow Drivers of Our Fair City,

      The environmentalists and their fellow travelers are trumpeting to the world
      the news that their Earth Car Free Day on April 19th is going to solve all
      the problems of transport in cities. Their so-called recipe: Get us out of
      some of our cars in some places and at some times. Shooot!

      Our reaction: These people (almost all foreigners!) have set out to
      undermine the American Way of Life As We Know It, and here at GESOVOOSASTD
      we are mad as hoot and not going to put up with it. But, Fellow Americans,
      Fellow Nashvillians and Fellow Drivers, we cannot just sit here and wait for
      nature to take its course. We need to fight back. And Nashville's first
      "Car Full Day" is the way to go. Here is how it works:

      On April 19th we will organize in our fair city the world's first Car-Full
      Day. Our unforgettable slogan is GESOVOOSASTD, which is short for ,
      "Get-every-single-operating-vehicle-out-on-street-at-the-same-time day".

      The environmentalists and their fellow travelers are saying that our road
      system can't handle the projected future levels of car use in our city. We
      will show them that it can. Let's all do this by getting into our cars,
      trucks, vans and SUVs and all getting on Nashville roads at the same time
      and stay there for a few hours. And if you happen to have one, drive along
      your electric car or natural gas van too. Everybody's welcome and we have a
      point to make.

      They are claiming that the system will break down by 2010 if the number of
      cars on the road keeps increasing. But hell boy, let's all get out on the
      road and show them that this all a pack of bleeding heart lies. We can
      simulate 2010 right now if we do just that. And they will see. (Go Vols!)

      The Three Intelligent Stages

      Here is this is gonna work. On the 19th, we throw a great big party. It
      will open and seven o'clock in the morning with every vehicle in town going
      to all the major causeways linking the various parts of the city and driving
      around for the first two hours or so. Then in Stage II we move over into
      the center of the city itself, where for an hour we all drive around the
      local streets showing those environment fanatics our stuff.

      Now it's 9:00. Time for the critical Stage III. We then take a full hour
      and all park. We will start by parking in the available on street slots,
      and from there move to fill up all off street parking lots, etc. And then if
      that's not enough, we will double, triple, and if needed quadruple park.
      Because this is America. And Americans have the god given right to drive
      and to park. (It's right there in the 2nd Amendment to the US Constitution.
      Study it! That's America talkin'.)

      Public Relations and Communications Program:

      We are confident that by doing this we will beat the Car Free fanatics at
      their own game and in many ways. Let's take press coverage for one.
      Getting this message out for GESOVOOSASTD will be much easier to organize,
      will involve only a marginal amount of work, guarantee that high profile
      media coverage will be a given, and, if we can make it last a whole week, we
      have every chance to bring our fair city into the eye of the Car-Free Day
      hurricane with a vengeance.

      Now, it might be that here or there it does turn up that there is indeed a
      capacity problem or bottleneck. But hey Jim! no one's perfect. This is
      good stuff for us to know, because when we see these problems we know what
      to do next. We need to get in there and make our great system even greater.
      So if we need more roads to keep the traffic moving, that's what we should
      be building. More places to park? Then let's call in the industry. And all
      this for a greater and more car-full city.

      And please don't go to www.carfreeday.com!

      Fed up with Car-Free Days and their knee-jerk propaganda for what they claim
      is better, safer and healthier cities. We are. So be sure that you do not
      go to the Earth Car Free Day website at www.carfreeday.com to hear what they
      have to say. It's all lies.

      The world is watching. Get out there and drive!

      Anyway, have you ever heard of a gun rack on a bus?

      * * *

      For more, get in touch with us at GESOVOOSASTD World Headquarters or by
      email at gesovoosastd@.... We're not afraid to pick up the phone.
    Your message has been successfully submitted and would be delivered to recipients shortly.