Wonder Girl's Big lesson!
- As we last left the lovely Wonder Sisters, they were gassed by the brainwashed beauty Barbara Gordon, now known as Joker Girl, and left on Gotham Commons, both laughing like stupid schoolgirls. Meanwhile, The Joker and his new femme fatale sped off to a crime-spree!
Wonder Woman: Hahahahaha...this has to...cease...hahahaha...dear sister!
Drusilla, still under the guise of Batgirl, continues to laugh!
Dru: I...hahahahahaha...agree! But...ahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha!!! how!!!
Wonder Woman: Batgirl always...hahahahaha...had an anti laughing gas bomb...in her...hahahahahahahaha...utility belt!
Drusilla: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! OK!!! I'll try!!! But it's...SO HARD TO CONCENTRATE ON...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! OUR MISSION WHEN I'M....LAUGHING UNCONTROLLABLY....HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!
Drusilla reaches in the Batgirl utility belt and pulls out a Batgirl Bat-A-Rang, causing her and Wonder Woman to laugh even more. She then goes into another compartment and finds a pair of Batgirl Handcuffs!
Wonder Woman: Hurry, Drusilla...hahahahahahaha! I'm losing the ability...HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...to stand!!!
Finally, Drusilla pulls out the anti-laughing bomb and throws it down at their feet. Much like Joker-Girl's laughing bomb, the smoke from the anti-laughing gas climbs up the Wonder Sister's bodies. Finally, the laughing ends and both ladies grab their chest in an effort to catch their breath.
Wonder Woman: ::Breathing heavily:: That sinister....Joker...what a...mastermind!
Dru: I...know...wowzers...remind me to bring tissues next...time...I guess we have to be...double prepared...
Wonder Woman: Of course...Drusilla...a fine...point. Now I wonder where...those two sped off too...We had better...alert...Commissioner...Gordon and the....police...squad of the actions...today.
Both ladies try their hardest to stand and walk away, but they have trouble. Apparently all that laughing really took the wind out of their sails.
Wonder Woman: For now though...let's take...a...small break...
Dru: You...said it!
But around the corner in the JokerMobile are The Joker and his newest Moll.
JokerGirl: Well, I'll be! Who knew they'd find a way to fight it off!
Joker: Don't act so surprised, my dear! They are the two greatest crimefighters. It seems no matter what banana peel they slip on, they'll always get up! It's our next move that we must plan for. And boy do I have a doozy in store for them! hoo hoo hoo!!! hee hee hee!!!
JokerGirl: Heh heh heh! I can't wait to hear it!
An hour later, the spandex sweethearts show up at Commisioner Gordon's office. To avert any ideas of Batgirl/Barbara's identity, Drusilla still remains in the Batgirl costume.
Wonder Woman: And that's where our trail stops. My Wonder-Security Camera's have picked up no inappropriate activity from the Joker and your daughter.
Gordon: I can't believe this! My own daughter! A criminal! There must be a way to reverse the brainwashing! I'm so shocked!
Dru-Batgirl: Now, now Commissioner! I'm sure we'll be able to reverse the process. She'll be back to being Gotham's favorite librarian in no time!
Commissioner: Many thanks to you, Batgirl, for your ceaseless dedication to thwarting the Joker and bringing my daughter back!
Dru-Batgirl: Well, as much as I appreciate your thanks, I must also say that Wonder Woman and Wonder Girl were just as involved.
Gordon: Of course, Batgirl. Dear Wonder Woman, please forgive me for not offering my appreciation. I am extremely thankful.
Wonder Woman: Of course, Commissioner Gordon. There's no need to apologize. I realize you're under phenomenal stress.
Gordon: Thank you, kind lady. You and your sister are matchless champions of justice.
Wonder Woman smiles.
Gordon: By the way, if you do not mind my asking, where is the irrepressible young Amazon today?
Dru-Batgirl: Well, Commissioner Gordon, as we all know...education for young heroines is extremely important. While I cannot divulge the name, I will say Wonder Girl's true identity is hard at work at Gotham University and studying to make herself a better person. After all, we all can always work at that.
Gordon: Of course, Batgirl. And as much as I'm extremely curious sometimes, I would never ask you to reveal your secret identity. Especially considering how much hard work you young heroines put into making the city crime-free.
Wonder Woman: Another aspect of what we respect about you, Commissioner. Now, please excuse us, we must return to the Wonder Labs to try and figure out a way to bring your daughter back safely...
Dru-Batgirl:...and to bring the Joker's crime wave an end!
Gordon: Yes, of course! Thank you for your time and hard work!
Both heroines run out of the Commissioners office and into their Wonder-mobile and race off.
Back at Joker's Hideout, the Clown Prince paces back and fourth as Barbara checks herself out in the mirror.
JokerGirl: Ya know, Green really isn't that bad of a color! I kinda like the way it shows off my bottom!
She turns around and checks herself out. She then wiggles her behind in front of the mirror and laughs.
Joker: Your beauty may be the death of you, young Miss Gordon! Now, please concentrate on our plan.
JokerGirl: Is that all you ever think of? Gee willikers! Besides, if Wonder Woman and her sister are doing what I think they're doing, than they probably have their own plan!
Joker: Oh? Really? Well, why don't you help me out and tell me what they might be doing?
JokerGirl: ::laughing:: ha! That may cost you extra...as in some extra thousand dollars!
Joker acts shocked!
Joker: A THOUSAND DOLLARS?!?!?!?!
JokerGirl: ::smiling:: Well, I guess the information stays with me! A shame! I could've even delivered their secret identities as well...but that may cost a MILLION!
Joker is getting extremely frustrated.
Joker: ONE MILLION?!?!?!
Joker calms down as the young beauty continues to check herself out and fix her hair.
Joker: You're right, JokerGirl! I will gladly pay ANY amount for that info. But first, don't forget my plan on what we shall do when they arrive here, no doubt to try and rescue you!
JokerGirl: You forget, I'm a librarian! I NEVER forget!
Joker: Very well done, my lovely!
Back at the WonderLabs, the two sisters are examining their options. Drusilla has now turned back into Wonder Girl.
WonderGirl: Golly gosh! One more second in that ugly outfit and I would've gotten sick! Blech!
Wonder Woman: Now, now! Miss Gordon has chosen the best colors and outfit for herself. It's not different than our Amazonian-given outfits. And as much as I prefer not to wear these...ahem...for lack of a better word, trunks, we must wear them with pride!
WonderGirl rolls her eyes at her prudish sister.
WonderGirl: I agree. The only upside is these costume sure do show off our awesome racks and bodacious butts!
Wonder Woman: DRUSILLA PRINCE!!!!!
Wonder Girl: Oh come on...
Wonder Woman is now absolutely furious at her sister's saucy comment.
Wonder Woman: I will not permit you to talk with such saucy language. And I'm growing very tired of your comments about my bottom and my costume as well. As a punishment, I will ask you to stay behind while I handle things with the Joker!
Wonder Girl: Awww...Gee whiz, Diana! I was just havin' some fun!
Wonder Woman: I've warned you. When we are wearing these costumes, we must stay focused on crimefighting! When you are in the guise of Drusilla Prince, then you may have all the fun you wish. It's bad enough these...men...like to poke fun of my costume...but I'd expect you to show a little bit more restraint. Now, if my plan goes well, I'll bring Barbara back here and we'll be able to restore her to normalcy. I ask that you remain here until then.
Wonder Woman dashes into her WonderMobile and speeds off. Wonder Girl plops down on a chair and mopes.
Wonder Girl: Awww...golly. What a big fuddy duddy!
Wonder Girl sits and thinks.
Wonder Girl: She's MY best friend! And I got her into this...It's time to start doing things on my own!
And like that WonderGirl hops on her Wonder-Cycle and speeds off.
By the time she gets to the Joker's hideout, it seems she has missed out on much of the fun. Wonder Woman is already in a big fight with six of the Joker's henchmen, one of whom has managed to snatch her belt. They lift and begin to carry the outnumbered Amazon, laughing all the way. That is until Wonder Girl breaks through a glass window and lands right in front of them. With her legs spread out, hands on her hips and a big smile on her face, she confronts the creeps.
Wonder Girl: Now now, boys! That's now way to treat a lady! Why don't you pick on someone your OWN size!
Taking up the challenge, they drop Wonder Woman and immediately go for the younger Amazon. Two henchmen pick her up by her arms and she responds by kicking the other two henchmen rushing toward her. The other guys try to steal her belt but she throws both of them through the window she came through.
Wonder Girl: Hope you had a nice fall, boys! See you next Spring!
She laughs and laughs as her sister approaches her.
Wonder Woman: I believe I asked you to remain home. While I appreciate your saving me, I do not appreciate your ongoing tendency to disobey.
Wonder Girl: Can we discuss this later, we have someone to save!
Wonder Woman: I'll suppress my frustration for Miss Gordon's sake. I saw The Joker run into that hallway. Quickly.
Wonder Woman grabs her belt and she and her sister dash into the hallway. They see the room where the villains have entered. They hear weird noises and enter very slowly. They find Barbara and Joker laughing and laughing as they stand to watch the Amazons walk in.
Joker: Ahhh yes...please come in my dear dear Wonder Sisters! My two greatest adversaries here! Live...and in living color!
Wonder Girl: The jig is up Joker! Your time is running out!
JokerGirl: Ha! Wonder Girl, you fool! This is only the beginning!
Wonder Girl takes a huge breath.
Wonder Girl: Miss Gordon, please come with us!
JokerGirl puts her hands on her hips and laughs.
JokerGirl: I don't wanna! I like being bad! Besides...I get to wear a groovy green leotard!
Wonder Woman: Miss Gordon, please, The Joker is using you!
Joker: What a fine choice of words! Because very shortly, I'll be using YOU too!!!!
Wonder Girl stands bravely.
Wonder Girl: Ha! Fat chance! What have you got up your sleeve, Joker?
Joker: Hahahahaha! Oh...just a little fun...
Wonder Girl: The fun is over, Joker! You're coming with us, now!
Joker: I don't think so!!!
Joker steps on a lever and a a trap door opens beneath the feet of the brave Amazons. They both slide down a giant slide and finally fall out into a large metal box downstairs. Awaiting their indignant arrival are four henchmen who quickly close the box.
Wonder Woman and Wonder Girl find themselves in a position they don't wish to be in...They find themselves, beltless, tiaraless, and bound to giant grills on the rooftop of Joker's hideout. With their hands above their heads and their long pantyhose wearing legs spread out, this looks like the sexiest barbecue ever!
Wonder Woman: What...on...earth is this?
Wonder Girl: Gee whiz...look! Magnifying glasses are right above us!
Joker and JokerGirl emerge and begin to laugh.
Joker: Yes, you little squirt! You are correct! But, first let me say it's been a joy fighting you two! There's no one else I'd ever fight! And young Miss Gordon here has offered me your secret identities which I shall leak to all supervillains everywhere! You'll be out of the picture, of course, but think of the fun they'll have threatening your loved ones!
Both heroines struggle as their eyes grow wide.
Wonder Woman: Fiend!
Wonder Girl: You...sinister MONSTER!!!
Joker: Yes yes yes...I've heard it before...and thankfully I don't have to hear it again. But, allow me to explain this to you. The grills you are bound to are based entirely in butter and the magnifying glasses will magnify the suns hot temprature by about a thousand. And they are pointed at those beuatiful heads of yours, so in just a matter of minutes, they will be fried right off. And what a shame, I kinda liked watching Wonder Woman run around in her underwear! So cool of you to resist current fashion trends, my dear. Well, all good things HAVE to come to an end, right? Toodle oo! hoo hoo hoo!!! hahahaha!
JokerGirl blows a kiss and turns around to smack her own fanny as a way to tease the two heroines who are absolutely helpless as they begin to sweat and struggle.
Wonder Girl: Turned into the worlds biggest grilled cheese sandwhich! What a way to go!
Wonder Woman begins to get worn out by the heat.
Wonder Woman: Never give up...there's always...ughn!!!! a way...out...
Wonder Girl: Well, look at it...this...way...if we don't...you never have to worry about me making fun of your wonder-panties again!
Can these two beauties escape?!?!
Will Barbara ever be the same again?!?!?!
Will Joker become the greatest criminal in history by revealing the identities of the Star Spangled Sweethearts to vengeful bad guys? Tune in next time!