- We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules
> from the male side. These are our rules! These are allnumbered"1" ON
> PURPOSE!You're a big girl. If it's up, put
> 1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
> it down. We need itup, you need it down. You don't hear us
> complainingabout you leaving it down.
> 1. Birthdays, Valentines, and Anniversariesare not quests to see if
> we can find theperfect present yet again!
> 1. Sometimes we are not thinking about you.Live with it.
> 1. Sunday = sports. It's like the full moon or thechanging of the
> tides. Let it be.Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it
> that way.1. Ask for what you want. Let us be clear on this one: Subtle hints do
> 1. Crying is blackmail.
> not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints donot work! Just
> say it!dates. Mark birthdays and anniversaries on the
> 1. We don't remember
>calendar. Remind us frequently beforehand.
> 1. Yes and No are perfectlyacceptable answers to almost every
> 1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it.
> what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriendsare for.
> 1. A headache that last for 17 months is a problem. See adoctor.
> 1. Check your oil! Please.months ago is inadmissible in an argument In
> 1. Anything we said 6
> fact, allcomments become null and void after 7 days.
> 1. If you won't dress likethe Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect
> us toact like soap opera guys.
> 1. If something we said can be interpretedtwo ways, and one of the
> ways makes you sad orangry, we meant the other one.
> 1. You can either ask us to do somethingor tell us how you want it
> done. Not both. If youalready know best how to do it, just do it
> yourself.whatever you have to say during
> 1. Whenever possible, please say
> 1. Christopher Columbus did not need directions, andneither do we.
> 1. The relationship is never going to be like it was thefirst four
> months we were going out. Get over it. Andquit whining to your
> girlfriends.ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
> Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkinis also a
> fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.not mind readers and we never will be. Our lack of mind-
> 1. If it itches, it will be scratched. We do that.
> 1. We are
> reading ability is not proof of how little wecare about you.
> 1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," wewill act like
> nothing's wrong. We know you arelying, but it is just not worth
> the hassle.1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer
> you don't want to hear.go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine.
> 1. When we have to
> 1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you areprepared to
> discuss such topics as navel lint,the shotgun formation, or monster
> trucks.You have enough clothes.
> 1. You have too many shoes.neither in your best interest or ours to take the quiz
> 1. It is
> together. No, it doesn't matter which quiz.Thank you for reading this; Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the
> 1. BEER is as exciting for us as handbags are for you.
> couch tonight, but did you know we really don't mindthat, it's
> like camping.
Lots of Love and Gentle Hugs
Someone who never forgets
Beauty is not just skin deep
For my lovely Kallista is not only sweet
But beautiful within
Despite her fragile skin
She has wings
And the joy she brings
Could light up the sky
Where she does fly
With strength that sings
And beautiful butterfly wings
Written by; Christina Perez
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