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  • thekoba@aztecfreenet.org
    Eric sends us the following story about an alleged Jewish miracle. This is even worse than the Madonna on the tortilla. ================= Begin forwarded
    Message 1 of 1 , Mar 16, 2003
      Eric sends us the following story about an alleged Jewish miracle. This
      is even worse than the Madonna on the tortilla.

      ================= Begin forwarded message =================

      Dear Kevin,

      For the moment, this leaves me speechless! I am
      laughing a lot though.





      Word is made flesh as God reveals himself... as a fish

      Edward Helmore New York
      Sunday March 16, 2003
      The Observer

      An obscure Jewish sect in New York has been gripped in
      awe by what it believes to be a mystical visitation by
      a 20lb carp that was heard shouting in Hebrew, in what
      many Jews worldwide are hailing as a modern miracle.
      Many of the 7,000-member Skver sect of Hasidim in New
      Square, 30 miles north of Manhattan, believe God has
      revealed himself in fish form.

      According to two fish-cutters at the New Square Fish
      Market, the carp was about to be slaughtered and made
      into gefilte fish for Sabbath dinner when it suddenly
      began shouting apocalyptic warnings in Hebrew.

      Many believe the carp was channelling the troubled
      soul of a revered community elder who recently died;
      others say it was God. The only witnesses to the
      mystical show were Zalmen Rosen, a 57-year-old Hasid
      with 11 children, and his co-worker, Luis Nivelo. They
      say that on 28 January at 4pm they were about to club
      the carp on the head when it began yelling.

      Nivelo, a Gentile who does not understand Hebrew, was
      so shocked at the sight of a fish talking in any
      language that he fell over. He ran into the front of
      the store screaming: 'It's the Devil! The Devil is
      here!' Then the shop owner heard it shouting warnings
      and commands too.

      'It said "Tzaruch shemirah" and "Hasof bah",' he told
      the New York Times, 'which essentially means that
      everyone needs to account for themselves because the
      end is near.'

      The animated carp commanded Rosen to pray and study
      the Torah. Rosen tried to kill the fish but injured
      himself. It was finally butchered by Nivelo and sold.

      However, word spread far and wide and Nivelo complains
      he has been plagued by phone calls from as far away as
      London and Israel. The story has since been amplified
      by repetition and some now believe the fish's outburst
      was a warning about the dangers of the impending war
      in Iraq.

      Some say they fear the born-again President Bush
      believes he is preparing the world for the Second
      Coming of Christ, and war in Iraq is just the opening
      salvo in the battle of Armageddon.

      Local resident Abraham Spitz said: 'Two men do not
      dream the same dream. It is very rare that God reminds
      people he exists in this modern world. But when he
      does, you cannot ignore it.'

      Others in New Square discount the apocalyptic reading
      altogether and suggest the notion of a talking fish is
      as fictional as Tony Soprano's talking-fish dream in
      an episode of The Sopranos .

      Stand-up comedians have already incorporated the carp
      into their comedy routines at weddings. One gefilte
      company has considered changing it's slogan to: 'Our
      fish speaks for itself.'

      Still, the shouting carp corresponds with the belief
      of some Hasidic sects that righteous people can be
      reincarnated as fish. They say that Nivelo may have
      been selected because he is not Jewish, but a weary
      Nivelo told the New York Times : 'I wish I never said
      anything about it. I'm getting so many calls every
      day, I've stopped answering. Israel, London, Miami,
      Brooklyn. They all want to hear about the talking

      A devout Christian, he still thinks the carp was the
      Devil. 'I don't believe any of this Jewish stuff. But
      I heard that fish talk.'

      He's grown tired of the whole thing. 'It's just a big
      headache for me,' he added. 'I pull my phone out of
      the wall at night. I don't sleep and I've lost

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