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Holly Jolly Brass Ring, ExCirculation Mgr Jambo's Potential Gift to You...

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  • AyunH
    Oh, ho, the mistle…alREADY? Yes, hard on the heels of the first East Village Inky ReSubscription Roundup comes the light-filled annual stress bomb known
    Message 1 of 1 , Dec 5, 2011
      Oh, ho, the mistle…alREADY?

      Yes, hard on the heels of the first East Village Inky ReSubscription
      Roundup comes the light-filled annual stress bomb known collectively as

      But all is not lost! Our angelic Ex-Circulation Manager Jambo has an
      offer that could potentially sweeten your holiday burden.

      Every East Village Inky gift subscription you purchase between now and
      New Year's Eve equals one chance to win an 8 issue grab bag of long out
      of print issues…for your own dayumnself! Hand photocopied from the
      masters by the mistress! Mostly hand-collated, too, I might add. (Didn't
      figure out how to lay em out properly til issue 16, a mere 5 issues
      before our Bob Cratchitt-style subscriber ledgers were retired in favor
      of something more electronic.)

      To reiterate. One gift subscription = 1 chance to win, 2 gift
      subscriptions = 2 chances to win, and so on, and so on. However many fit
      in a pear tree. You don't even have to like us on Facebook. (Though you

      The winner will not only be contacted directly, his or her first name
      will be announced on my website, and every other social kingdom to which
      I've stolen a set of keys.

      Think of it this way, you're not just being sucked in by a promotional
      scheme, you're supporting the post office. Hopefully Congress will
      follow your example by passing H.R 1351, the United States Postal
      Service Pension Obligation Recalculation and Restoration Act of 2011.
      Your first assignment is to think of everyone you know who might enjoy
      receiving an envelope that's not a bill on a quarterly basis.
      Compliments of you! The lucky recipients' first issues will have be
      accompanied by a certificate proclaiming your largesse!

      But what if you're a heel dragger? We've STILL got your covered! Not yet
      because you're not the only heel dragger in this relationship, but very
      very soon I will be drawing a little gift certificate that I can email
      as a print-outable, open-uppable PDF to all those who wait until
      Xmakwaanzakuh Eve to get their shopping done.

      Still, why wait? The post office needs every stamp we can throw at them,
      and wouldn't it be nice to have the actual zine to stuff in their
      stockings? (Substantial, yet still slim enough to tuck in their …
      perhaps we should refrain) I vote we conclude this dirty business, tie
      it up with a bow and move on to the nog!

      Question: is a book by Ayun Halliday, ordered from Ayun Halliday a
      contest-worthy substitute for a gift subscription? What do you think?

      With luck, you may just grab that aforementioned brass ring, as featured
      in the first half of the official East Village Inky Age Progression

      Merry brightness from...

      Your spaniel

      Ayun Halliday
      Chief Primatologist of the East Village Inky

      Dare to Be Heinie!
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