Heaping Helping of Heinies and then some...
- Spring is here! Can you feel the heinies on the breeze? I can! Why?
Because my first kid's book, Always Lots of Heinies at the Zoo is
slated for its official release on Cinco do Mayo, just 3 days shy of
this ginormous low budget fundraising event I'm throwing at/for Inky's
school, and my head, like the doomed dandelion, is fixing to pop off,
just in time for Mother's Day!!! (so, if you come to Bluestockings
Bookstore for the Mamabration that night, it'll be easy to recognize me
- I'll be the one with the bleeding stump.)
There's no singular best way to procure your copy of Always Lots of
Heinies at the Zoo, except to buy early and often! Seriously. Ask your
favorite indie bookseller to lay in a supply, drive the numbers up by
purchasing on Amazon, ensure that a couple of extra pennies wind up in
my pocket by going through the link on my website:
I hope it doesn't become too taxing to read aloud... once you've got it
memorized, you can just put your brain on autopilot, lean on that Bossa
Nova beat, and pretend you're on the beach in Rio, rather than pulled
up cribside, or perched on the edge of a twin-sized, possibly
pee-stained mattress. Before you know it, they'll be taking the subway
by themselves. Until then, you can always give yourself a break by
parking the young in front of the computer for the illustrator Dan
Santat's inspired Always Lots of Heinies at the Zoo promotional
trailer! Feel free to embed it in your blogs, because I can't figure
out how to embed it in my zine.
If you live in or near NYC or Virginia, you can bring your heinie (and
any tiny heinies you may happen to have lying around) to hear my giant
one hold forth for 32 rhyming pages, live and in person! Tell you what.
Tell the kiddies to bring me a drawing of their favorite animal head,
and I'll reciprocate by dashing off a heinie to match, suitable for
refrigerator display, anatomically correct, or not, as you prefer.
Here's a listing of events with more to come:
You can win extra points in the heaven of your choosing if you buy a
ticket (or 20) to the FOUND Magazine event I'm coordinating at Inky's
cash strapped public school, ICE (otherwise known as the Institute for
Collaborative Education.) Not crazy enough to live in NYC? Surely you
know someone (besides me) who is! Tell them!!! For the love of
god...buy them a ticket and force them to come! We've got several acres
of seats and not nearly enough butts scheduled to fill them, so come
on down! Ten bucks (all of which goes to the school) will get you (and
your 500 closest friends) a veritable cornucopia of live entertainment
- from the musical to stylings of FOUND's resident heart throb, Peter
Rothbart and the sword swallowing antics of FOUND's resident sword
swallower Brett Loudermilk, to the theatrical mayhem of NYC's very own
Story Pirates, and the piece de resistance, Davy Rothbart, FOUNDER of
FOUND, reading some of the choicest FOUND notes and lists received at
FOUND HQ over the year. Be advised that the language can get foul, like
... somewhere between my street at 2am and Superbad. Get a babysitter,
leave grandma at home, and decide whether or the virgin ears in your
entourage will be irreparably damaged by profanity read out loud to
hilarious effect. (I personally could use some of that right about
now...) Remember, all the money goes to educating my own personal
child, as well as some 400 deserving others! See them in their natural
habitat! Come to this OPEN TO THE PUBLIC, low budget, hilarious
fundraising event, or turn your geographically challenged sadness into
lemonade by helping us spread the word. (there's a facebook event page
set up for your convenience!)
More on FOUND:
RSVP and invite others via Facebook:
Dare To Be Heinie!
In other news, I'm chipping away at the new East Village Inky, so if
you've moved, or have strayed from the subscription fold, now's the
time to render unto Caesar.
I don't know what the hell else. Someones's squeezing my stem and the
pressure is building. Who knew a dandelion could be brunette?
Now what can I do for you?
Happy Mother's Day.
Chief Primatologist of The East Village Inky
Freshly Minted Children's Author
Dare to Be Heinie