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5515Re: [Yuricon] Digest Number 301

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  • Lord Rees
    May 1, 2002
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      That reminds me of this:

      ---THE HETEROSEXUAL QUESTIONNAIRE---
      written by 'Michi', originally posted to
      AnimeAdult@yahoogroups.com, reposted with permission.

      1.What do you think caused your heterosexuality?

      Athena.

      2. When and how did you decide you were a heterosexual?

      1971, when I was about 20.

      3. Is it possible that your heterosexuality is just a phase you may
      grow out of?

      nope.

      4. Is it possible that your heterosexuality stems from a neurotic
      fear of others of the same sex?

      could be.

      5. If you have never slept with a person of the same sex, is it
      possible that all you need is a good Gay lover?

      nope.

      6. Do your parents know that you are straight? Do your friends
      and/or roommate(s) know? How did they react?

      Mom still can't believe I'm not christian. dads long dead.

      7. Why do you insist on flaunting your heterosexuality? Can't you
      just be who you are and keep it quiet?

      Who flaunts? You asked.

      8. Why do heterosexuals place so much emphasis on sex?

      It's FUN!

      9. Why do heterosexuals feel compelled to seduce others into their
      lifestyle?

      Donno, I've never done it.

      10. A disproportionate majority of child molesters is heterosexual.
      Do you consider it safe to expose children to heterosexual
      teachers?

      Nope.

      11. Just what do men and women DO in bed together? How can
      they truly know how to please each other, being so anatomically
      different?

      Same thing any two or more people in love do in bed. Mainly sleep.

      12. With all the societal support marriage receives, the divorce rate
      is mounting. Why are there so few stable relationships among
      heterosexuals?

      Cause of the hubba hubba gene. Its usually paired with the DUFIS gene and
      reinforced by the DimWhit chromosone..

      13. Statistics show that lesbians have the lowest incidence of
      sexually transmitted diseases. Is it really safe for a woman to
      maintain a heterosexual lifestyle and run the risk of disease and
      pregnancy?

      Her informed choice to make, not mine.

      14. How can you become a whole person if you limit yourself to
      compulsive, exclusive heterosexuality?

      Cause I'm crazy.

      15. Considering the menace of overpopulation, how could the
      human race survive if everyone were heterosexual?

      We're surviving? I thought the human race was in decline.

      16. Could you trust a heterosexual therapist to be objective? Don't
      you feel s/he might be inclined to influence you in the direction of
      her/his own leanings?

      I don't trust any shrink.

      17. There seem to be very few happy heterosexuals. Techniques
      have been developed that might enable you to change if you really
      want to. Have you considered trying aversion therapy?

      Nope, I'm one of the happy ones. Besides, shock therapy makes my fingers
      twitch.

      18. Would you want your child to be heterosexual, knowing the
      problems s/he would face?

      That is their choice, not mine. However I will support whatever lifestyle
      choice they make. Who they love has nothing to do with who they are.


      Are we all happy now?
















      Everything is controlled by a small evil group to which,
      unfortunately, no one we know belongs.
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