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TFVNews: 21 Rules For Being A Good Republican

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  • Damian J. Anderson
    I just responded to a liberal friend of mine who sent me a tongue in cheek list of 21 Rules For Being A Good Republican . I am forwarding my response to you
    Message 1 of 1 , Feb 1, 2007
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      I just responded to a liberal friend of mine who sent me a tongue in cheek list of  "21 Rules For Being A Good Republican". I am forwarding my response to you with identifying information removed.

      Damian Anderson


      ---------- Forwarded message ----------
      From: Damian J. Anderson <damian.anderson@...>
      Date: Feb 2, 2007 12:07 AM
      Subject: Re: I could go on . . .
      To: PS

      Hi PS,

      That is a great painting, Bierstadt's "Storm in the Rocky Mountains", with beautiful lighting and color, though I have not seen it before.

      Okay, so I thought I would take on your Republican stereotypes. Here we go:

      21 Rules For Being A Good Republican

      (1) You have to believe that the nation's current 8-year prosperity was due to the work of Ronald Reagan and George Bush, but that yesterday's gas prices are all Clinton's fault.

      I would say the current prosperity has a lot to do with tax cuts providing incentives, and Federal Reserve Board monetary policy providing sufficient liquidity after 9/11/2001 to promote business growth. Gas prices are governed by the world price of oil, which is in large part being stimulated by the rapid growth of the economies in India and China and their consequently increased demand for oil, and the lack of oil refining capacity in the USA, which was damaged even further by Hurricane Katrina in August 2005 on the Gulf coast.

      (2) You have to believe that those privileged from birth achieve success all on their own.

      No, I don't believe that. Many of those privileged from birth become socialist liberal Democrats, such as Ted Kennedy and Nancy Pelosi. Republicans have a healthy respect for making money the old fashioned way, by earning it, and don't want the government to take it without some very good reason for the public good.

      (3) You have to be against government programs, but expect Social Security checks on time.

      I don't expect a dime from Social Security, which is welfare for senior citizens, but I am not against all government programs, just the ones which are ineffective, or are not serving the general welfare. In particular, I oppose government programs which foster dependency rather than self-reliance.

      (4) You have to believe that government should stay out of people's lives, yet you want government to regulate only opposite-gender marriages and what your official language should be.

      Government staying out of people's lives means not redefining marriage to be something it never was in the past or dissuading people from learning English by making it unnecessary. People living in America who learn English tend to be much more prosperous than those who never learn it, so it in the public interest to encourage the learning of English.

      (5) You have to believe that pollution is ok, so long as it makes a profit.

      No, this is a red herring. I like clean air just as much as Democrats do. I just don't count the gas I exhale as a pollutant, the way the global warming alarmists do.

      (6) You have to believe in prayer in schools, as long as you don't pray to Allah or Buddha.

      I am in favor of people being able to pray in whatever way they want, wherever they want, as long as nobody is forced to pray against their will.

      (7) You have to believe that only your own teenagers are still virgins.

      It does happen. I was a virgin all of my teenage years, and I believe my three teenage children are. I could be wrong however.

      (8) You have to believe that a woman cannot be trusted with decisions about her own body, but that large multi-national corporations should have no regulation or interference whatsoever.

      If women do not want to be mothers, it is better than they are not. Women who become mothers against their will do not tend to be good mothers. Let socialists abort their babies. That way, socialism will dwindle. It is a good thing for God-loving conservatives to have lots of babies however. :-) I don't think multinational corporations should be unregulated, but that regulation should be for the public good, and not be so onerous as to hurt the economy, or any particular industry unduly, without a strong public interest at stake.
      (9) You love Jesus and Jesus loves you and, by the way, Jesus shares your hatred of AIDS victims, homosexuals, and President Clinton.

      God hates sin not people, and loves sinners, though He grieves over us, much as we do over our children who go astray. He is our Dad. Jesus and God are much of the same mind. I like the bumper sticker that says:

      "Jesus loves you. Everyone else thinks you're an asshole."


      (10) You have to believe that society is color-blind and growing up black in America doesn't diminish your opportunities, but you still won't vote for Alan Keyes.

      I would have voted for Alan Keyes for President. He is a brilliant conservative scholar, but his name recognition and electability are poor.


      (11) You have to believe that it was wise to allow Ken Starr to spend $50 million dollars to attack Clinton because no other U.S. presidents have ever been unfaithful to their wives.

      It is well known that many presidents were unfaithful to their wives. Ken Starr was following the law in investigating wrongdoing by President Clinton, including perjury for which he was disbarred in Arkansas in agreement with state bar officials.

      Clinton was disbarred from his Arkansas law license for five years and ordered to pay $25,000 in fines to that state's bar officials. The agreement came on the condition that Whitewater prosecutors would not pursue criminal charges against him after he lied under oath about his relationship with White House intern Monica Lewinsky


      (12) You have to believe that a waiting period for purchasing a handgun is bad because quick access to a new firearm is an important concern for all Americans.

      No, I favor people being investigated before owning a firearm to ensure that they are not felons or mentally ill, but that law abiding sane citizens have a right to bear arms for self-defence and sport, just as you own swords, which are also lethal weapons.

      (13) You have to believe it is wise to keep condoms out of schools, because we all know if teenagers don't have condoms they won't have sex.

      No, I don't think we should keep condoms out of schools, but that kids should be taught the value of abstinence, and if they choose not to, they ought to buy their own condoms, not expect the taxpayer to pay for them.

      (14) You have to believe that the ACLU is bad because they defend the Constitution, while the NRA is good because they defend the Constitution.

      I believe that the left manufacture rights that are not in the Constitution by judicial fiat, rather than by pursuing their agenda by passing legislation. I favor the US Constitution, but not the activist interpretation of it such that judges legislate from the bench. Let elected lawmakers make laws, and let unelected judges decide cases based on the law.

      (15) You have to believe that socialism hasn't worked anywhere, and that Europe doesn't exist.

      Socialism does not work in Europe or anywhere else. I lived under European socialism, and left for America in 1980 because of it.

      (16) You have to believe the AIDS virus is not important enough to deserve federal funding proportionate to the resulting death rate and that the public doesn't need to be educated about it, because if we just ignore it, it will go away.

      I think that AIDS gets disproportionately large federal funding compared to other causes of death. The public needs to be educated about how to change their behavior so as to avoid this disease, since the biggest risk factors are behavior related. Have you ever heard of "bug chasers"?



      (17) You have to believe that biology teachers are corrupting the morals of 6th graders if they teach them the basics of human sexuality, but the Bible, which is full of sex and violence, is good reading.

      I think that teachers ought to teach kids in school about the biology of sexual reproduction, and that the expected norm of behavior is abstinence until marriage. I favor teaching about all the major religions in school as a necessary part of a full education, and especially teaching about the fundamentals of what the adherents of Christianity believe as a prerequisite to understanding American history.

      I think ethical teachings are the responsibility of parents, but also, that society expects certain norms, such as not stealing, killing, or taking another man's wife. The social norms of most civilized societies adhere closely to the Ten Commandments. Kids ought to know these things.

      (18) You have to believe that Chinese communist missiles have killed more Americans than handguns, alcohol, and tobacco.

      Chinese communist missiles certainly have that potential to kill more people than alcohol, tobacco and firearms. However, for now, more people are killed by drunk drivers in America than are killed by war. Have you heard of the bumper sticker that says:

      "Alcohol Tobacco and Firearms should be a convenience store, not a government agency"


      Funny ... though I don't happen to agree. :-)

      (19) You have to believe that even though governments have supported the arts for 5000 years and that most of the great works of Renaissance art were paid for by governments, our government should shun any such support. After all, the rich can afford to buy their own and the poor don't need any.

      I don't favor government sponsored art which is offensive to a majority of the population. To my understanding, historically, most government sponsored art was religious or patriotic in nature. That can hardly be said of the works one often hears of being sponsored by the National Endowment for the Arts, such as "Piss Christ" and the art exhibit entitled "Sensation," which included Chris Ofili's Holy Virgin Mary,a depiction of the Virgin Mary stained with elephant dung, at New York's Brooklyn Museum of Art

      (20) You have to believe that the lumber from the last one percent of old growth U.S. forests is well worth the destruction of those forests and the extinction of the several species of plants and animals therein.

      I believe that lumber is a renewable resource to be managed by modern forestry harvesting techniques, but that old growth lumber is a national treasure to be preserved.

      (21) You have to believe that we should forgive and pray for Newt Gingrich, Henry Hyde, and Bob Livingston for their marital infidelities, but that bastard Clinton should be impeached.

      Nope. I was pretty unhappy with the Republicans who did this, just as much as the Democrats who did. I am not in favor of a double standard on this one at all.

      So there you have it. I doubt that I fit your Republican stereotype. Sorry. ;-)


      On 2/1/07, PS wrote:

      Hi Damian,
      Here's the list I told you about, for "Good Republicans." It's a little dated now, but still apropos to the inconsistencies and one-sidedness of Republican vehemence and righteousness.
      Comments welcome.  ;-)
      P.S. Meanwhile here's an inspiring painting that I THINK both Republicans and others can enjoy.

      Damian J. Anderson

      PO Box 6488
      Silver Spring, MD 20916, USA

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