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    WOSSNAME Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion February 2001 (Volume 5 Issue 2) *********************************************************************
    Message 1 of 1 , Feb 28, 2001
      Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Legion
      February 2001 (Volume 5 Issue 2)

      WOSSNAME is a FREE publication for members of the
      worldwide Klatchian Foreign Legion and its affiliates,
      including the North American Discworld Society and other
      continental groups. Are you a member? Yes, if you sent
      in your e-mail address. Are there any dues? No.
      Editor in Chief: Joseph Schaumburger
      Staff Writers: Geof Johns, Michael Jones
      Art Director : Rhett Pennell
      World Membership Director: Becky Swaney
      Convention News Editor: Megan Perry
      Webmaster: Paul Wilkins, disk@...
      Copyright 2001 by Klatchian Foreign Legion
      ==Part 1
      1. A Report from Colin Smythe
      2. Convention News
      3. New Discworld Group
      4. Free Book
      5. Most Unpopular Spell Combinations on Discworld
      6. Your Favorite Discworld Character
      7. The Limerick Contest
      8. Death on Discworld
      ==Part 2
      9. The Three Faces of a Witch
      10. Letters from our Readers

      I'm delighted to say that at the British Book Awards
      (known as the Nibbies because the award takes the
      form of a large pen-nib) given out in London Feb. 22nd,
      Terry received 'The Bookseller Services to Bookselling
      Award' . Here's what Nicholas Clee, the Editor of
      The Bookseller, said:

      "The winner of The Booksellers award for a lifetime
      contribution to bookselling is an author. He is the kind
      of author who tends to get overlooked when awards
      committees meet. One reason for this neglect may
      be that he produces bestsellers year after year, and
      so gets taken for granted; another, that the genre in
      which he writes is unfashionable among the kinds of
      people who sit on awards committees. Yet for a good
      many years he has been one of the three most popular
      novelists in Britain, and no author has done more to
      help booksellers, chains and independents, to sell his
      books. Ladies and gentlemen, please pay tribute
      to Terry Pratchett."

      For Pratchett fans who have difficulty reading the type
      in the novels, Ulverscroft /Thorpe (who've just bought ISIS)
      have just published large print editions of THE CARPET
      PEOPLE (0-7089-9527-6 - it has Thorpe on the spine and
      Spectrum on the title page, which is their paperback
      imprint) and THE FIFTH ELEPHANT (0-7089-9210-2,
      which has Thorpe on the spine and Charnwood on the
      title page - their hardback imprint).

      Andrew M.Butler's POCKET ESSENTIALS: TERRY
      PRATCHETT is a book-by-book guide to the Discworld
      series, the Johnny Maxwell and Bromeliad trilogies and
      the early novels, plus GOOD OMENS. Each entry
      includes first publication details, notes on recurring
      characters, a mini-essay and a contentious score out
      of five. To be published April 2001. ISBN 1-903047-39-0.
      Pocket Essentials is an imprint of Oldcastle Books Ltd.
      18 Coleswood Road, Harpenden, Herts AL5 1EQ, UK

      ISIS has now issued THE TRUTH, read by Stephen
      Briggs, whose reading of THE FIFTH ELEPHANT
      was released just before Christmas 2000.

      Samuel French (the theater publishers) expects to
      publish Irana Brown's stage adaptation of LORDS AND
      LADIES in May 2001 - ISBN 0-573-01888-X

      -- Colin

      Megan Perry writes:

      We've added 8 more emails- 4 to the list of
      folks responding to the Volunteer Form, and
      another 4 responding to the survey in the last
      WOSSNAME! This makes around 15 surveys
      I've gotten and 15 Volunteer Forms! (Of
      course, some of the folks responding to the
      survey checked the little 'Yes, I would like
      to help'). Awesome, awesome!

      I've started a database (finally) so that I can
      keep them all straight. And it's growing, growing,
      growing. I plan on emailing them all to thank them
      for taking the time to fill out the stuff, but I'm going to
      wait until Sunday night. I might get another wave in
      (and I really hope I do!). I'm so glad we got such
      a good response.

      If you'd like to help, write to me at:

      DiscWorldCon Chairman

      Hi there Joe - this is The Lady here! Was
      wondering if maybe you could mention my
      community in your next newsletter?
      Addicted to Discworld @ http://communities.

      We're doing well by the way - 50+ members already
      & I've only been up & running a bit over a month!!
      Hoping to get even more members to join the fun though.
      We have active discussions about the series and
      Pratchett-God in general, including ideas for the movie
      casting couch. And of course the chat room
      (Sator Square) is open whenever we can get around the
      time zone problem! We love to share our addiction with
      others and it really does help to know that we are not
      alone - there are other people out there who understand
      our Pratchettisms when the rest of the world thinks we're
      completely Bursar!!!!

      Thanks Joe, see you there again soon?

      The Lady
      Fourecks (Australia)
      4) FREE BOOK

      Subj: Prize Draw - THE THIEF OF TIME
      From: info@... (Discworld Convention 2002)

      Terry's next Discworld novel, THE THIEF OF TIME,
      will be released in May this year. How would you like
      to own a rare advance copy? How would you
      like to be the first among your friends to read it?

      For just two pounds fifty pence, you can have a chance
      to do just that. The Discworld Convention 2002 is
      holding a Prize Draw with a valuable proof copy of
      THE THIEF OF TIME as First Prize! Other prizes
      include retired Clarecraft pieces and a unique T-shirt
      featuring Rincewind by Paul Kidby, among other
      tempting Discworld goodies.

      Proceeds from this draw will be donated to Terry's
      adopted charity, the Orangutan Foundation. To enter,
      visit: http://www.dwcon.org/prize_draw.php3

      You can pay by cheque or postal order, or online by
      credit/debit card, using our secure payment system.
      The closing date for entries is March 31st, so buy
      your tickets soon!

      The Committee
      Discworld Convention 2002
      * "2002: A Discworld Odyssey" * August 16th-19th, 2002 *
      * Web: http://www.dwcon.org/ * Email: info@... *
      © Michael Jones 2000 (Discworld and individual characters © 2000 Terry and
      Lyn Pratchett)

      Pelepel's Temporal Compressor and Megrim's Accelerator
      (For people who want to go nowhere fast...or is that the other way round?)

      Bigby's Unstoppable Force and Malachi's Immovable Object
      (When physicists are becoming a serious problem).

      Summoning of the Eternal Bigot and Julian's Purple Redecorating Surprise.
      (Guaranteed to liven up any social situation).

      Fireball (Seventh Level) and Create Stream
      (Anyone for steam cleaning?)

      Guthrey's Enthralling Hallucination and Berkeley's Bad Nightmare Trip
      (Weeble weeble sclup...)

      Resurrect the Dead and the Rite of AshkEnte
      (This is what we call Polar Opposites, students. Besides which, it could
      get awfully crowded).

      Create Shield (Hermetic) and Sotoo's Unbearable Stench

      Inspire Lust and Summon Mother-in-law.

      Priap's Enduring Prominence and Disperse Clothing
      (Need I say more?)

      Summon Demon by Name and Feeblemind
      ("You never know what yer gonna get")

      Summon CGI, Create Foul Script, and Lucas' Merchandising Nightmare
      (For really BAD movie sequels you can't miss these spells).

      Teleport (Dungeon Dimensions) and Summon Offensive Weapon
      (Erinyas' Surprising Bouquet variant)
      (Hopefully they're impressionable under all those fangs).

      Summon Familiar and Randall S. Pratt's Cruelty to Animals

      A new poll has been created for WOSSNAME
      readers by Kieran Beattie (thetownfool@...)

      Who is your favorite discworld character?

      o Samuel Vimes
      o Carrot Ironfoundersson
      o Angua von Uberwald
      o Detritus
      o Cheery Littlebottom
      o Fred Colon
      o C.W. St. J "Nobby" Nobbs
      o Gaspode
      o Archancellor - Mustrum Ridcully
      o The Bursar - A.A. Dinwiddie (with an 'O')
      o The Dean
      o The Librarian
      o Ponder Stibbons
      o DEATH
      o Susan Sto Helit
      o The Death of Rats
      o The Patrician - Havelock Vetinari
      o Rincewind
      o Twoflower
      o Granny - EsmeWeatherwax
      o Nanny - Gytha Ogg
      o Magrat Garlick
      o Agnes/Perdita X Nitt
      o Greebo
      o Other

      To vote, please visit the following web page:


      Note: Please do not reply to this message. Poll votes are
      not collected via email. To vote, you must go to the Yahoo! Groups
      web site listed above.

      One minor disclaimer:
      Yahoogroups only allows 25 slots (which I
      think is enough, given we all only get to
      vote for one character). And there was
      much debate about who got left out. Of the
      half minor/major characters - The Death of
      Rats vs. Albert, Verence vs. Greebo were
      some biggies. My list of characters stretched
      to over 50... Dorfl, Cohen, Sybil, Igor, Jason
      and Shawn Ogg, not to mention the one book
      wonders like Pteppic, Errol, Brutha etc.

      So please, if you have a favorite character
      who is not on the list, choose the 'other' option.
      As it stands I can see the librarian and Death battling
      for No.1 and everyone else battling to get a vote.

      Aside from my sample, we now have:


      The sad tale of Rincewind the wizard:
      He cast all his spells in a blizzard.
      Despite all his magic,
      The ending is tragic:
      He turned himself into a lizard.

      Given to Rincewind by Two-flower
      A Luggage that oft would devour
      All that he could see;
      I'm glad that's not me!
      To meet with such ferocious power...

      Archchancellor, wizard, Ridcully,
      Once hunted inside of a gully.
      His prey was the Dean,
      Who's never known lean,
      He quit early, his weapons unsullied.

      All above limericks property of, and copyrighted to,
      Bethany Ayers, USA.


      The librarian was heard to cry "Ook"
      While reading an interesting book
      When the library exploded
      He soon got quite loaded
      And if he could speak he'd say "Fook"

      Rincewind's spells always went off half-assed
      So the wizard soon learned to run fast
      He'd never look back
      For with Death on his track
      He planned to be first and not last

      All above limericks property of, and copyrighted to,
      Linde, Bryson, and Tessa Brown, CANADA

      Any other poets out there? With all the talent we
      have, we should be able to get dozens more, at
      least. Contest will be open until the May issue.


      (In the January issue, we presented some
      speculations by our readers on which
      character Terry is going to kill off in the
      near future, as rumored. We are still
      getting mail on this:)

      Dear Editor,

      The character death thing is interesting.
      My gut seems to say that one who would
      die is Death. It's so impractical. I agree
      with some of the other people on the list,
      there would be some real plot openings
      and changes if Vetinari died; but the only
      character I can see dying is Magrat. She's
      the only one stupid enough to die, and
      she's getting out of the witch circle. If we
      watch the message boards more, though,
      rumors will out!

      -- Sarah S.
      Dear Editor,

      On 23/01/01, Steve D'Aprano wrote:
      >I suspect Granny might be the one.
      >PTerry has also written that Granny
      >is getting so powerful that he's starting
      >to run out of situations to >put her in. He
      >expressed the desire to let someone
      >get one up on the interfering old baggage.
      >That was before Carpe Jugulum, so maybe
      > all the terrible things he did to Granny has
      >got that urge out of his system. But, she
      >ended up more powerful than ever...
      >I guess time will tell.

      I don't know. Control of power is inherent in
      Witchcraft, the same way obligation is. The
      greatest battles Granny faces now are the
      ones with herself. Witches who decide to
      run rampant with their power tend to meet
      destiny rather quickly. The more powerful
      Granny becomes, the more of her power
      she must exert simply to control herself.
      That in itself makes some good storylines,
      as we saw in CJ.

      -- Michael Jones
      Dear Editor,

      I personally believe that the one to die will be
      Captain Vimes because in T5E ( does anyone
      remember the fifth element?) Vimes takes the first
      vacation of his life and Carrot takes over for a while.
      This leaves the field open for Carrot to take over
      permanently. Also, with Vimes gone, not too
      many people will be upset and will start to try to bribe
      Carrot and such ( they don't know him very well do they...).

      -- Kim Hickey
      Dear Editor,

      I don't think it will be the Patrician,
      because we already saw what will
      happen, in The Truth. Likewise, I
      don't think it could be Granny, because
      she almost did in Carpe Jugulum.

      My guess is either Nobby Nobbs or
      Fred Colon. It won't be Vimes or Sybil,
      because they're expecting, and by all
      reports, PTerry isn't that cruel. Angua
      and Carrot are the semi-obligatory
      tween romance, so it probably won't be
      one of them. It might be one of the UU
      staff; perhaps Ridcully or the Bursar. But
      my vote is Nobby.

      -- Bethany Ayers, Kansas, USA
      End of Part 1, says my computer -- continued on Part 2 of 2

      [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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