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WOSSNAME -- SEPTEMBER 2007 -- PART 1 OF 8

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  • Not A Granny
    WOSSNAME Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Leg-, LANCRE WITCHES September 2007 (Volume 10, Issue 9)
    Message 1 of 1 , Sep 29, 2007
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      WOSSNAME
      Newsletter of the Klatchian Foreign Leg-, LANCRE WITCHES
      September 2007 (Volume 10, Issue 9)
      *********************************************************************
      WOSSNAME is a FREE publication for members of THE YOUNG WITCHES OF
      LANCRE! BUT WE'LL LET YOU READ IT ANYWAY. And so can the Klatchian
      Foreign Legion. Because we're public-spirited and very considerate,
      never mind what Mistress Weatherwax says. Are you a member? WELL,
      OBVIOUSLY NOT, BECAUSE *WE'RE* THE MEMBERS. Are there any dues? Not
      exactly, but we do appreciate old clothes, willow branches for hat-
      making, broom bristles, and any cured meats or goat milk or pickled
      eggs you happen to have going spare. SUPPORT YOUR NEIGHBOURHOOD
      WITCH! OR ELSE!
      *********************************************************************
      Editor in Chief: Annagramma Hawkin
      Assistant to the Editor in Chief: Tiffany Aching (by permission of
      the Editor in Chief)
      News Editor: Petulia Gristle
      Staff Writers: Dimity Hubbub, Caramella Bottlethwaite, Gertruder
      Tiring, Lulu Darling
      Convention Reporter: Magenta-who's-really-Violet Frottidge
      Staff Technomancer: We don't hold with staffs! Or technomancy. Hah!
      Book Reviews: Tiffany Aching (well, she reads a lot of books)
      Puzzle Editor: Agnes Nitt
      Assistant Puzzle Editor: Perdita X. Nitt
      Bard in Residence: Weird Alice Lancrevic (Mrs Gogol likes her)
      DW Horoscope: Diamanda, oh all right, Lucy, Tockley
      Emergency Staff: Mrs G. Ogg, HRH Magrat de Lancre
      Art Director: Harrieta Bilk (even though she squints)
      World Membership Director: Lucy Warbeck (after all she *is* a
      Witchfinder in Training), assisted by Miss Perspicacia Tick (after
      all, she's a Witchfinder General even if she's totally not young)
      Webmaster: Amanita DeVice (good with spiders)
      Copyright 2007 by Klatchian Foreign Legion
      oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

      ------------------------------------------------------------------------

      INDEX:

      ====Part 1 -- ALL THE NEWS WHICH WITCHILY FITS

      1) QUOTE OF THE MONTH
      2) LETTER FROM YOUR EDITOR: YOUNG WITCHES GO FOR IT!
      3) COLOUR OF MAGIC: OFFICIAL WEB SITE
      4) MAKING MONEY SIGNING TOUR: A REMINDER
      5) PTERRY'S CHELTENHAM Q&A
      6) MASKERADE IN FELIXSTOWE
      7) MAKING MONEY: MAKING POETRY

      ====Part 2 -- MORE NEWTS, I MEAN, NEWS

      8) GUARDS! GUARDS! IN ADELAIDE
      9) THE TURTLE MOVES: 2009 NORTH AMERICAN DISCWORLD CONVENTION
      10) MAKING MONEY: ICONOGRAPH CHALLENGE
      11) IMAGE OF THE MONTH: DAVID JASON AS RINCEWIND
      12) EUAN MACRAE: FAREWELL TO A VERY IMPORTANT FAN
      13) THE PRATCHETT BIBLIOGRAPHY
      14) JAMES NICOLL ATE'NT DEAD
      15) AN INTERESTING ITEM ABOUT PINS
      16) THE GOOD WEBBE GUIDE

      ====Part 3 -- OFFICIAL AND OFFICIALLY UNOFFICIAL NEWS

      17) IT'S OFFICIAL! MAKING MONEY IS A BESTSELLER!
      18) UNOFFICIAL COMPANION PRESS RELEASE!
      19) UNOFFICIAL COMPANION PRESS RELEASE COMPANION!
      20) SPEAKING OF PUBLISHERS: REAL IS DE WORDE

      ====Part 4 -- WIT AND WITCHDOM

      21) LEARNING TO SPELL
      22) THE CHILDREN OF ARTEMIS

      ====Part 5 -- WITCHERY AND WIZARD-MEETINGS

      23) WITCH TRIALS IN ROUNDWORLD
      24) AROUND THE BUGARUP CAMPUS

      ====Part 6 -- Part 5 - MORE WITCHERY

      25) MULTIPLE CHOICE WHICH WITCH QUIZ
      26) MOSTLY HERBS

      ====Part 7 -- WITCHSTROLOGY

      27) YOUR MONTHLY DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE

      ====Part 8 -- WEIRD ALICE, BOOK REVIEW AND CLOSE

      28) THE CLACKS LOG OF WEIRD ALICE LANCREVIC
      29) REVIEW: THE WIT AND WISDOM OF DISCWORLD
      30) FAREWELL, AND BLESSED BE

      oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

      1) QUOTE OF THE MONTH

      "Look, just because a woman's got no teeth doesn't mean that she's
      wise. It might just mean she's been stupid for a very long time."
      -- Tiffany Aching

      %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

      2) EDITORIAL: THE POINTY HAT HAS SPOKEN

      Blessings be upon this community!

      We have had an interesting year up in the mountains, but now that
      the harvest season is coming to a close there's been a bit of slack
      time, so I have been able to turn my thoughts away from rustic
      business and back to *proper* magick. At last week's coven meeting I
      showed my girls a literally impressive dimension-changing spell and
      they were literally amazed and here we are! And I am quite pleased
      to see that the right sort of witching is so popular here -- I went
      to a magick shop yesterday and could hardly move for all the
      crystals and wands and sacred amulets around the place! And even the
      silly little shop assistant with the squint knew about drawing on
      the Powers of the Elements and calling the Corners of the Earth and
      all those useful things Mrs Earwig taught me back when I needed a
      little bit of training, and also she had some tattoos that were
      literally amazing and even drawn in real permanent ink. The shop-
      girl, that is, not Mrs Earwig. Speaking of Mrs Earwig, I think she
      sells herself short because she doesn't know any of the aspects of
      practical witching, which I do of course, but then again it is only
      right that the pupil should surpass the teacher. Can you imagine her
      with her hand up a pig's backside at four o'clock in the morning? I
      should think not! Mrs Earwig, that is, not the shop-girl. Who knew
      quite a lot about chants for natural births and crystal therapy, by
      the way.

      But I'm sure you all want to know more about me: my steading is
      going fantastically well now that I have a Reputation and people are
      literally terrified of me. I used to have the girl Tiffany Aching up
      to do chores for me, but now she's taken with her sheep-witching so
      I have shouldered the burden myself. That's what the Craft is about,
      after all, dealing with those unpleasant little duties on behalf of
      the lesser people. And getting them to do the duties for you. I must
      say that my local charges show me proper respect for this, and they
      are also good for free publicity. Publicity is very important for a
      witch. I won't say more about that though, because the secrets of
      the Craft are, well, secret, although if you come up next week to
      move my dunny shed I might be persuaded to tell you just a little.
      For a consideration.

      Anyway, we've a little time still before the spell literally runs
      out of, what was that word the shop-girl used, batteries I think, so
      let me present my coven who are doing a nearly satisfactory job. Oh,
      they've already put their names at the top? Well, that will be more
      than sufficient. I decided to let the Aching girl do the actual
      editing and Clacks-setting because she's good at books, I suppose
      someone has to be, and the pig-witch gets to be the assistant
      assistant because somebody has to make the tea.

      I expect all you readers to enjoy this issue, because it is
      literally the best one ever. Remember, support your neighbourhood
      witch! Blessed be.

      -- Annagramma Hawkin, Editor in chief, literally

      %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

      3) COLOUR OF MAGIC OFFICIAL WEBBE SITE!

      http://www.skyoneonline.co.uk/tcom/

      "The Colour of Magics' universe is also more ambitious in its
      breadth, with the production team determined to bring an even richer
      Discworld to Sky One screens, with increased production values and
      ground-breaking CGI work."

      %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

      4) MAKING MONEY SIGNING TOUR IN USA -- FINAL DATES REMINDER

      Wednesday, September 26
      07:00 PM
      Terry Pratchett will be promoting Making Money
      POWELL'S BOOKSTORE
      3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd Beaverton, OR 97005
      Thursday, September 27
      07:30 PM
      Terry Pratchett will be promoting Making Money
      TATTERED COVER BOOK STORE
      1628 16th St. Denver, CO 80202

      Saturday September 29
      Time TK
      Terry Pratchett will be on the Mall in Washington DC
      Appearing at the National Book Festival
      Sponsored by the Library of Congress
      Details TK
      Sunday, September 30
      01:00 PM
      Terry Pratchett will be promoting Making Money
      CHESTER COUNTY BOOK COMPANY
      975 Paoli Pike West Chester, PA 19380
      Monday, October 01
      07:00 PM
      Terry Pratchett will be promoting Making Money
      BARNES & NOBLE/Union Square
      33 E 17th ST New York, NY 10003

      %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

      5) PTERRY Q&A AT CHELTENHAM

      from http://pratchettnews.vox.com/

      The Cheltenham Literature Festival will include an hour-long session
      with Terry Pratchett on the 6th of October. The event, to take place
      at Everyman Theatre, will be "a celebration of nearly 25 years of
      magical fantasy as he reveals the secret of his success,"
      according to the website (see below). To reserve your seat:

      http://www.cheltenhamfestivals.com/whats_on/event_detail.html?id=
      1574

      or http://tinyurl.com/2n3h3e

      %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

      6) MASKERADE IN FELIXSTOWE

      An announcement from Esmi [Good name, that -- T.A.]:

      The Felixstowe Amateur Dramatic and Operatic Society (FADOS) present
      Maskerade.

      The Society are celebrating their 60th anniversary with this
      production and will be bringing together their adult group and
      their youth group for the occasion.

      Dates: Nov 29th & 30th, plus Dec 1st 2007
      Venue: The Spa Pavilion Theatre, Felixstowe, Suffolk
      Theatre Box Office: 01394 282126

      Felixstowe is a seaside resort town with the Theatre itself on the
      seafront. A list of bed & breakfast accommodations can be provided
      by the Society, if required. Please see the FADOS web site for
      further details:

      http://fados.co.uk/

      %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

      7) 'MAKING MONEY' MAKES ACCIDENTAL POETRY

      HarperCollins has a promotional text extract from Making Money,
      available online. The page also features the chapter titles,
      printed in this fashion:

      Waiting in darkness
      A bargain sealed
      The hanging man
      Golem with a blue dress on
      Crime and punishment
      A chance to make real money
      The chain of goldish
      No unkindness to bears
      Mr. Bent keeps time

      What a fascinating piece of blank verse!

      http://tinyurl.com/35nhfv

      ooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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      End of Part 1, continued on Part 2 of 8.
      If you did not get all eight parts, write: interact@...
      -------------------------------------------------------------------------
      Copyright (c) 2007 by Klatchian Foreign Legion
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