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WOSSNAME -- JULY 2006 -- PART 2 OF 3

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  • JSCHAUM111@aol.com
    WOSSNAME -- JULY 2006 -- PART 2 OF 3 ... oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo 7) SONG OF THE MONTH BRINDISIAN RHAPSODY (as sung by Enrico
    Message 1 of 1 , Jul 31, 2006
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      WOSSNAME -- JULY 2006 -- PART 2 OF 3


      (as sung by Enrico Basilica and Perdita X. Nitt)

      by Weird Alice Lancrevic

      Is this the real Disc?
      Is this just Sourcery?
      Caught in the Shades, I've
      No escape 'cept through Cockbill Street
      Ankh-Morpork clods, look up to the Gods and see...
      I'm just a poor mime, scorpion pit for me
      'cause I'm pale of face, white as snow
      Gestures? - aye. Speeches? - no!
      Any way the words go
      Doesn't really matter to me, to me
      To me...

      Carcer...just killed a man
      Put a crossbow 'gainst his head
      Cocked the trigger, now he's dead
      Vimesy...got him on the run
      Through Time itself, Lu-Tze will show the way
      Sybil, oooh, didn't mean to make you cry
      If I'm not back by six p.m. tomorrow
      Carry on, carry on
      It's "Where's My Cow?" that matters.

      "Goodbye, oook and 'hippo!' - I've got to go
      "Gonna run like blazes, right out of my shoes
      "Wizards, ooh
      "I don't wanna die
      "I sometimes wish I had a nice boring job..."

      I see a little scorpion pit-o full of mimes
      Scare a mime, scare a mime, Vetinari's fandango
      Thunder barked to Lightning,
      "Herding sheep's exciting, whee!"
      Clever Leonard (clever Leonard)
      Clever Leonard (clever Leonard)
      Clever Leonard's brain is so
      Terrific, ohhh!

      I'm just a poor mime, no tyrant loves me
      "He's just a poor mime from a street-theatre free
      "Spare Lancre Blue from the Ramtops for tea!"
      Easy come, easy go - Gaspode says it's so
      Patrician! No - he will not let you go (let him go!)
      Patrician! He will not let you go (let him go!)
      Patrician! He will not let you go (let me go!)
      Will not let you go (let me go!)
      Never let you go (let me go!)
      Ooh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no -
      Oh Captain Carrot, Captain Carrot
      Captain Carrot, let me go!
      I'm learning Thud
      And Detritus wants a game with me,
      With me, with meee...

      So you think if you cut your own throat I will buy?
      So you think you can force me to eat Dibbler's pie?!
      Ooh, Nobby, it's Named Meat for me, Nobby
      Just gotta get meat
      Just gotta get meat with my beer.

      Dean is really fatter, anyone can see
      Dean is really fatter
      Dean is really fatter than me.

      ...any way A'Tuin goes...


      For those of a thespian bent:
      A & C Black Publishers Ltd have acquired Methuen's playlist, so
      stocks of the seven plays adapted by Stephen Briggs that have been
      published by them ('Jingo', 'Interesting Times', 'The Fifth
      Elephant', 'The Truth', 'Monstrous Regiment', 'Night Watch' and
      'Going Postal') will soon be available for sale online from

      Permission requests should now be addressed to the
      Permissions Dept, A.& C. Black Ltd., 38 Soho
      Square, London W1D 3HB. Orders for copies should be sent to A.&
      C.Black at the above address or obtained through local booksellers.


      To the Editor:

      My favorite character is Death. I love it when he shows up in the books. My
      next favorite might have to go to Gaspode, the talking dog.

      I *lo-o-ove* Gaspode. Second only to Cut-Me-Own-Throat Dibbler, the venal
      merchant with the venous sausages inna bun. And rock cakes whose raisins fly
      away like clouds of flies ("It's a miracle!").

      There should be a new book that features the dog who says "bark" just to
      confuse humans, the sausages inna bun, the lethal pies and the flying
      currants. Oh, and the entrepreneur who supplies them. Possibly with an
      episode happening in Djehlibehli.

      -- Nisaba Merrieweather

      To the Editor:

      At the start of Men at Arms, Vetinari is consulting
      Vimes regarding the selection of a new Captain of the
      Watch. They consider Colon, Nobby and Carrot in turn.
      It's quite clear that Vetinari knows who Nobby is.
      However towards the end of the book, when Vetinari is
      shot and Nobby is attending to him, Vetinari does not
      know who Nobby is.

      -- Jehane

      To the Editor:

      In your most recent issue, there was an inquiry as to which Discworld
      books are good for introducing others to Discworld. I have accumulated
      some experience in the area, and would like to share my expertise. I
      have found that in starting people off on Discworld, either a
      stand-alone book or the beginning of either the Witch or Watch series
      is preferable; Color of Magic is too far removed from the modern
      Discworld. It does depend upon the literary tastes of the
      introducee, however, and while in some cases a book in the middle of a
      sequence may be preferable. The Discworld Reading Order Guide is
      always helpful in cases of dilemma, however; also, try not to spoil
      people too much; reading Discworld books out of order the first time
      means you Know Stuff too early occasionally, and you get very very
      confused in some spots, especially in the Watch books.

      -- Undead Goat

      Answer to a query in last month's WOSSNAME:

      George Duffield (somewhere near Lancre) asked us:

      I finally got a friend to agree to start reading the Discworld
      books. Which one should I start him on ? I'm tempted to
      just say start at the first one and go in sequence . But on
      thinking back , it seems the first couple aren't as good as
      the later Witch series , Death series and Guard series.
      Anyone have an insight to offer ?

      ...and reader Tamar has replied:

      As you have noticed, the first four or five are not quite in the
      same vein as the middle-period and later books. There are some
      usual recommendations: Good Omens, Mort, Small Gods. All three
      are good, and all three, oddly enough, have male protagonists
      and might be good choices for young males of various ages. But
      a better route may be to find out what your new reader's areas
      of interest are, and choose the book that connects to them.

      For instance: a film buff might enjoy Moving Pictures.
      Someone who is a fan of early rock music might prefer Soul Music.
      A follower of Broadway musicals, or certain kinds of old movies,
      might prefer Maskerade. A lover of Shakespeare could start
      with Wyrd Sisters, one who likes good fairy tales but dislikes
      the oversimplified versions could begin with Witches Abroad.
      One who likes police procedurals or political intrigue might
      like the Watch books. A philosopher might appreciate Feet of

      It's all in finding the hook that will get them to give the
      book a chance. After that, it's up to Pratchett.

      To the Editor:

      Just a very quick note to our mailing list members to let you know
      that we have more rare pieces on eBay, some of which are finishing soon!

      You can find them at:


      Amongst them, you'll find Clarecraft pieces that are no longer available
      in the shops (including Discworld, Faerie Realm and many old ranges),
      as well as Cow Parade. Many of these are 'last ones', too.

      With Collectible World closing down in May and Clarecraft last year,
      demand for some of our last few remaining pieces is likely to be high,
      so please don't hesitate!

      -- Elton
      End of Part 2, says my computer -- continued on Part 3 of 3
      If you did not get all 3 parts, write: jschaum111@...

      [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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