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WOSSNAME -- JUNE 2005 -- PART 4 OF 4

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  • JSCHAUM111@aol.com
    WOSSNAME -- JUNE 2005 -- PART 4 OF 4 ... oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo ==== Part 4 7) YOUR NEW DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE by Lady Anaemia
    Message 1 of 1 , Jun 30, 2005
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      WOSSNAME -- JUNE 2005 -- PART 4 OF 4
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      oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
      ==== Part 4

      7) YOUR NEW DISCWORLD HOROSCOPE
      by Lady Anaemia Asterisk
      (continued from Part 3)

      %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

      Hoki the Jokester 22 Dec - 20 Jan

      Where there's magic, there's love. This is an even better time than
      last month was for frog-kissing and the rescuing of princesses in
      towers, as an unexpected conjunction of Thaumsup A and the nearby
      constellation of Fonsareli has produced a veritable plague of
      princess-imprisoning in Genua and Brindisi, not to mention those
      rains of frogs in the Ramtop foothills. So put the potion back in the
      basket and listen to your secret heart; whither a wizard wanders,
      there too may a witch win wonderful waywardness. The 18th is a good
      time for cleaning of pointy hats. Avoid esbats from the 9th to the
      15th, unless you want a *lot* of wizardly gatecrashers (although my
      charts are unclear on this - I keep reading the rune for that result
      as "goatcrushers"), and let's just forget about that "...other one"
      nonsense for once, shall we? I can't be having with hard-headed
      common sense all the time, and neither can you.

      Romantic tip: leave your shamble at home! You don't want it exploding
      at inconvenient times.

      %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

      The Rather Large Gazunda 21 Jan - 18 Feb

      Gazundians crave adventure, so what better way to satisfy that
      craving in the coming weeks than by going on a quest for romance? All
      the countries of the Disc await your questing presence. There are
      hearts to be won, jewelled thrones to be trodden under your sandalled
      feet, contests of skill and strength to be - no, make that contests
      of skill and daring to be, well, contested, coaches to rob, and did I
      mention the intimate tete-a-tetes at wayside inns? And the champagne
      soiree┬ęs at the opera? The world is your ocean-dwelling thingy this
      month, particularly in the second and third week. Try a cruise on the
      warm waters of the Rim (where exotic island tribes are rich in
      coconuts but starved for love) or a trek across the desert wastes of
      Klatch (where exotic nomads are rich in camels but short of dates),
      and keep an eye out for lovelorn Boring'uns crossing your path at high
      speeds. Nothing like a very quick romance to whet the blood, I always
      say.

      Romantic tip: don't forget the stepladder.

      %%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%%

      Lesser Umbrage 19 Feb - 20 Mar

      Love and death, or love and Death, pretty much make up most of the
      human condition - and that of most other species - and though
      Umbragians traditionally know quite a lot about death, it's now time
      to explore the delights of the other part! Here's a surprising fact:
      it's possible to engage the target in a full-on, no-holds-barred
      romance battle and have both parties emerge still alive at the end of
      the night. Makes quite a change, doesn't it? When stalking a partner,
      it's considered good form *not* to break into their bedroom and set
      deathtraps beforehand; it's also worth noting that Deadly Nightshade
      is not a suitable choice for a lover's bouquet. Blind Io himself is
      the best god to sacrifice to this month, but also don't forget
      Astoria the Love Goddess. You wouldn't want her little arrows to have
      the wrong sort of philtre on the tips! Practise being non-stealthy,
      except when scaling castle walls to drop boxes of chocolates into
      your loved one's boudoir.

      Romantic tip: always be sure to coordinate your weaponry.
      No-one wants a poison-ring that clashes with one's outfit.

      ... and there you have it. Please write directly to WOSSNAME
      at jschaum111@... if you have any questions and we will
      forward them directly to Lady Asterisk. If she's in a good mood,
      she may even answer them.

      oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
      8) BACK AGAIN! YOUR DISCWORLD PUZZLE
      oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

      This month's book is "THE SCIENCE OF DISCWORLD III:
      DARWIN'S WATCH" and completion of the puzzle will reveal
      where the book was released. In the next few months, we
      will continue the puzzles with "The Science of Discworld"
      I and II, "Thud," and "Nanny Ogg's Cookbook." This should take us
      up to October, 2005, and where we go from there will depend on Terry's
      output or our inspiration. It has been pointed out that we have not done
      the Mapps or the comics or the Yearbook/Diaries or even the Calendars,
      not to mention the non-Discworld titles.

      What do our readers say?
      oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
      HOW THE PUZZLE WORKS

      Answer the questions and put the letter indicated into
      the spot shown. Read the letters backwards and
      find out where it all took place
      (Note: all spellings are from the 2005 Ebury Press edition.)
      ------------------------------------------------------------------------------
      Example: Pratchett's first name -- 1st letter:
      ANSWER: Terry = T
      -----------------------------------------------------------------------------

      1. Where the History Monks live. (word 2, letter 1)
      2. University proctors (word 1, letter 1)
      3. Author of The Origin of Species in an alternate
      reality (word 1, letter 1)
      4. Discoverer of the Special Theory of Slood.(last name, letter 3)
      5. Paley's argument in Natural Theory (1802) (word 2, letter 1)
      6. Home of the god of evolution (word 2, letter 6)
      7. What Darwin called the Librarian (word 1, letter 3)
      8. If you see it, it's not there. If you hear it, it's not
      there either. (word 1, letter 2)
      9. The Librarian, as introduced (word 1, letter 2)
      10. UU professor Extreme Horticulture (last name, letter 9)

      /__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/__/ = Where it all took place.
      1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10

      Puzzle solution will appear next month.
      oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

      SOLUTION TO THE JUNE 2005 PUZZLE:

      1. A record collector who couldn't bear a hole in his collection
      (first name, 4th letter) WAYNE = N
      2. Named an apple after Nanny Ogg (last name, 2nd letter)
      PERCY HOPCROFT = O
      3. Hero of Terry's first published story (first name, 1st letter)
      CRUCIBLE = C
      4. Created dwarfish game of hnaflbaflsniflwifltafl (first name, 2nd letter)
      Oops! Should be: 5th letter. MOROSE STRONGINTHEARM = S
      5. Confronts Cohen the Barbarian at bridge (first name, 4th letter)
      MICA THE TROLL = A
      6. Hero of book by Dogger (first name, 1st letter)
      ERDAN THE BARBARIAN = E
      7. Pulls sword from stone and become king (first name , 2nd letter)
      URSULA THE BEAR = R
      8. Jason Ogg's secret of controlling horses (first name, 2nd letter)
      HORSEMAN'S WORD = O
      9. Author of the Ankh-Morpork National Anthem (first name, 3rd letter)
      HENRIK SHLINE VON UBERWALD = N

      N_/O_/C_/S_/A_/E /R_/O_/N_/ = Where it all happened
      1*/ 2*/ 3*/4*/ 5*/ 6*/ 7*/ 8*/ 9*/ = NOREASCON
      oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
      -------------------------------------------------------------------------
      If you did not get all 4 parts, write: jschaum111@...
      -------------------------------------------------------------------------
      Copyright (c) 2005 by Klatchian Foreign Legion


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