WOSSNAME -- JULY 2003 -- PART 2 OF 3 (continued)
5) BIG CHANGES AT THE COLLECTOR'S GUILD
As the world's leading supplier of Discworld figurines, The Collectors'
Guild has built up a great reputation among Discworld fans over the
years. Elton Murphy, the man in charge there, used to head the
Clarecraft Discworld Collectors' Guild and has even been known to throw
a party or three for thousands of Discworld fans over the years!
The great news is that Elton is now the owner of the company. There's a
slight change of name - it is now Collectors Gifts and has a new site at
Elton said, "This is an exciting, yet somewhat scary, time for me.
Fatherhood was thrust upon me in May and now this.
"Being in charge doesn't mean radical change. My brief before, under the
guidance of R and P Baker, was to always put the customer first. Because
of this, many of our customers are now personal friends of mine!
"The new website is a great step forward. Not only does it allow us to
offer a whole range of merchandise, but the inbuilt loyalty scheme and
product-pairing discounts means that it will offer even more to our
customers. Over the coming months, we have a lot of development work to
do and our customers will really benefit.
"Over the coming months, we will be visiting trade fairs and contacting
potential new suppliers. In the past, we have welcomed ideas from our
existing customers and I would like to invite any Discworld fan to let
us know if they would like to see any other ranges available on our
Elton can be contacted via the online form on
or by emailing
LETTERS FROM OUR READERS
6) DISCWORLD AUCTIONS
To the Editor:
This is a real quickie....
Much as it hurts me to see you all spend your money anywhere other than
Collectors Gifts, I thought that the Discworld auctions currently
taking place on our old auction site may interest some. And no, they've
got nothing to do with me!
We'll have a new competition for you soon and more offers (DW44 Death on
Binky is currently just 170 pounds!). Details to follow.....
-- Elton Murphy
7) MONSTROUS REGIMENT CHANGES?
To the Editor:
Thanks to Drusilla for the review!
Any info or speculation about how far the Merkin version
will diverge from the One True British version? Apparently
The Truth got mangled in transit.
Are the Canadian versions of pterry's works the same
as the British versions?
-- Henry Polard
KFL MEETS AROUND THE WORLD
8) MELMEET, AUSTRALIA
MELMEET REPORT: COOKMEET
Date: 19th July 2003
Venue: SteVen's Eeevil Fortress Of Avoiding The Neighbours
(still in Melbourne, but possibly via a dimensional portal)
Present: Steven, Dru, Bek, Matt, Jeff, Big Mad Adrian
Special Guest: Ralph 'Wuffles' D'Aprano
The purpose of this meet was originally to hassle Big Mad
Adrian, who is an actor and local theatre producer and has
expressed interest in presenting The Truth in Melbourne next
year. To that end, Bek obtained a copy of the Stephen Briggs
stage adaptation -- yay Amazon! -- as an inspirational gift
for Big Mad Adrian (henceforth known as BMA) and it was
decided to lure him to the Fortress for a presentation.
As we were having a lunch meet, we also decided it was
time at last to hit Nanny Ogg's Cookbook, not least because
making Nanny's recipes at meets has been the *only* thing
the much-maligned 'Sinneysiders' (BU'ers from Sydney) held
over us in the friendly, healthy, open-hearted ~cough cough~
intercities rivalry. So boo-ya-sux to you, Sydmeeters, now
you'll have to come up with something *really* impressive
like getting your wizards' staffs to actually work :P
When all were present and Ralph was happily burying a
bone in the garden, we cooked Ponce da Quirm's Genuine
Howondaland Curry (not to be confused with Mrs Colon's
Genyooin Klatchian Curry) in two batches -- with nuclear
homegrown chillies and without, the latter being for the
wussy eaters among us who shall not be named. Once again,
Steven's cherished Dwarf Battle Muffin was carried out
and displayed; the Battle Muffin is now over 14 months
old and as robust as ever, and as fine a museum piece as
can be found in Fourecks. Over luncheon, we discussed
ideas for staging The Truth while Ralph begged unsuccessfully
under the table. If Ralph can be taught to "bite" on command,
he's a shoo-in for the part of Wuffles, even though he is a
middle-aged fat Cocker Spaniel rather than an elderly
terrier. Ah well, why not, look how much mileage the fat
middle-aged Roger Moore made out of pretending to be a
sexy secret agent! When all were sated, the menfolk made
manful attempts at changing the light bulb in the Fortress
waterfall, though the final results -- a sickly blue bulb that
gives it a rather cheesy look, like those paper umbrellas
served in cocktails at the Mended Drum - were less than
After a long pause for more conversation and digestive salts,
out came the "piece o' resistin's": yes, the dreaded Strawberry
Wobbler! BMA turned pale and distinctly nervous-looking
at the sight of it, and single entendres abounded as it was
served, while Dru regaled the table with tales of a "bring a
banananana" party she'd once thrown, where some of the
humorous fruit sculptures would have made Gytha herself
blush. Well, a little...oh, all right, barely at all, but they
certainly made some of the lunchers blush!
Eventually BMA swanned off to see a friend in another play,
and Bek and Jeff headed off, leaving Matt, Steven and Dru
to the serious business of Scrabble. This time it was decided
that Discly names would be allowed, but sadly, none
cropped up until the end stages, where the players suddenly
got religion -- it's amazing how many points can be scored by
placing Io or Om in the right positions! Note: never play
Scrabble with Steven - he cheats. Mind you, he *still* ends
Another good day. Dru's health permitting, soon there may
again be public MelMeets!
Cook's note: these Nanny Ogg recipes can be found on
p.42 (Howondaland Curry) and p.64 (Strawberry Wobbler)
-- Drusilla D'Afanguin
9) BRISMEET, AUSTRALIA
Date: Unknown, maybe July 21, 2003
Venue: Brisbane? Manly?
Before Dru gets in with a demand, here's the Kathy
version of the BrisMeet. I caught the 10:00 train into
the city, and then another out to the bayside
suburb of Manly. First stop off the train was the loo.
It was a long trip!
Waiting at the exit was a young lady clutching a copy
of Pterry's "Soul Music", so I displayed my copy of
"The Truth" and we introduced ourselves. Peta had got
off the same train. After only a couple of minutes, anther
person with a book approached, this time "Men at Arms".
None of us had much idea of where anything was, so we
decided to wander in the general direction of the Bay,
and see what came along. We weren't sure where we
were going, but I had a badly printed map I'd downloaded,
so we managed to find the right area.
On the way, we discussed what we'd like for lunch and
settled on kebabs. This suited Peta, as she got her fave
vegetarian version. We sat for a while and after finishing
the food (outside table too, was warm enough (just) in the
sun) and took pictures, as both Jehane and I had cameras.
Then we just decided to go look for better scenery for more
pics, and also to find a nice person to take the pics as we
wanted all three of us in them. We then decided there wasn't
much point in wandering too much, and settled on a BBQ
table in the park, where we just talked lots!!
When the wind got a bit cool and time got a little short for
me, we headed back toward the station, stopping off on the
way to warm up a little with hot chocolates all round. Jehane
saw Peta and I onto the train, and headed back to her abode,
more talking occurred on the train, although the noise from a
multitude of schoolchildren tended to make conversation difficult!
Peta got off at her stop and I continued on to the city and
back out again to the West. All in all, I'm glad I managed to
overcome my agoraphobia enough to actually get out and meet
people! Both Peta and Jehane made me feel welcome, and I
enjoyed their company very much.
In a footnote, we did have a bit of a chuckle over the speed and
ease with which we organised our Meet, and doing so without
the benefit of a special list to help us!!
-- Simone K - resident anarchist and BrisMeeter.
If you did not get all 3 parts, write: jschaum111@...
End of Part 2, says my computer -- continued on Part 3 of 3
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]