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WOSSNAME -- MARCH 2003 -- PART 2 OF 3 (continued)

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  • JSCHAUM111@aol.com
    WOSSNAME -- MARCH 2003 -- PART 2 OF 3 (continued) ... oooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo KFL MEETS FROM AROUND THE WORLD
    Message 1 of 1 , Mar 28, 2003
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      WOSSNAME -- MARCH 2003 -- PART 2 OF 3 (continued)


      Dates: 20th and 22nd February 2003
      Venues: The Eeevil Fortress of D'Apenguin (2.1),
      the Spiffy Shrine of Buffy aka Bek's House (2.3)

      Attending: Dan and Dru, plus assorted BURA members
      by remote ant-link
      (2.1); Dan, Bek, Matt, Paul, Dru, Steven, Jeff and
      Surprise Guest 'Da Ref' (2.3)

      ** NB: this chronicler has no idea what went on at Danmeet 2.2,
      but it included the rare presence of Jase *and* Lora, so someone
      had better write it up! [Ed. Note: All taken care of.]

      5) Danmeet 2.1

      Dan rang the Fortress early and unexpectedly: "I've got my entire
      Aerosmith CD collection and it wants a cup of tea, can I bring it over?"
      Dru rushed to drive the dust bunnies back to their cages and hide
      the leftover chilli herring mousse...

      "Hi Dan, come in, you'll have to open the door yourself because I was
      about to get out of the Uncommon Room, really I was, but PT's just
      walked in and the Snow Queen and Looming Andrew are there too
      and you don't mind making the tea yourself, do you?"

      Yes, that's right. Dan drove all the way from Adelaide, which is
      hundreds of somethings away from Melbourne, to spend
      most of the afternoon chatting to non-Melbourne BU
      members via the anternet!

      But it was great fun, a massive pune-ing session, and tea did
      get made eventually. A partial copy of the day's Uncommon
      Room pune party resides in the Fortress vault for anyone who
      might want to read it.

      -- Drusilla D'Afanguin

      6) Danmeet 2.2

      This Danmeet started with Jase and Dan waiting for Steven out the front
      of Steve's workplace while Matt came up to fetch him. They did their
      best to blend in, with shorts and tee-shirts. Unfortunately, everyone
      else in the area was wearing shirts and trousers and jackets and even
      the occasional tie.

      Lora phoned Jase and told him that she was on her way after walking too
      far up the street. She told Jase to look out for somebody wearing a
      chain as a belt. Unfortunately, the local bondage club had chosen that
      same day to come out in public. Steven spent a very interesting ten
      minutes introducing himself to ladies wearing chains and very little
      else, before Jase reminded him that he'd already met Lora and knew
      exactly what she looked like. Spoilsport.

      Hours and hours[2] later Lora arrived. Contrary to reports, she is not a
      hideously deformed creature at all, and Jase and Dan had to make sure
      they kept a tight grip on Steven's collar to keep him under control.
      After distracting Steven by mentioning lunch, he led the group off in
      search of sustenance. First stop was the Japanese noodle and sushi
      restaurant, but unfortunately it was packed. The group decided that it
      would likely be days before they could even get in the door, so they
      followed Steven to the cafe next door. Everybody ordered various
      pastas, chicken curries, stews, or assorted other meals, then tramped
      back to Steve's office to eat.

      Taking over the lunch room, the group proceeded to make a lot of noise
      and talk about a lot of nonsense. Steven's workmate Mike, otherwise
      known as Matt's former school-chum Mikey, wandered in, and joined in
      the conversation.

      Steven handed out "The Star Wars Holiday Special" to those foolhardy
      enough to want one. And then Dan's mobile phone rang.

      While Dan was speaking on the phone, Lora called out loudly in her most
      languorous and sensual voice, "Daaaan, come back to bed!".

      Of course, by the Laws of Narrative Causality, it was Dan's wife on the
      phone. Dan turned bright red, a few seconds later so did Lora when she
      realised, and the rest of the table went into gales of laughter.

      All up, a wonderful time was had by all, except for Dan who will be
      getting divorced next month.

      Everything in the above report is true, except for the bits that have
      been changed to annoy the guilty.

      [1] Note for Merkians and UKdians, in XXXX shorts are not underwear, but
      outerwear. Generally they are like trousers but need less material. Also
      known as "Stubbies" (but not the kind that hold beer).

      [2] Would you believe minutes?

      -- Steven D'Aprano

      7) Danmeet 2.3

      A full turn-out for this event, which was to be a BBQ. For the first
      time EVER, Paul arrived later than Steven (who was an hour late).
      Jeff was on cook's duty, and he discovered that it's possible to
      achieve room-temperature nuclear fusion using nothing more than
      plastic-skinned chicken sausages -- does anyone know what
      the half-life of a BBQ grill-shelf is? Soon came a knock at the
      door and in walked the long-absent BU Referee, David Hopkins!
      Re-introductions were made all round. After burnt sausages and
      various other non-burnt foods we all convened in the sitting room,
      where Bek, Matt and Paul presented Dru with a gift-wrapped
      Scrabble set. Now Steven will *have* to learn to spell,

      Matt and David settled down to a round of Evil Computer Games,
      Paul wandered through the library (of course), and the rest of us had
      Assorted Conversations and Divers Amusements. Dan regaled
      those of us who had missed 2.2 with the tale of how Lora nearly
      got Dan divorced -- hahah, now someone will *definitely* have to
      write up that part of the Danmeet!

      Highlight of the afternoon was a Buffyfest, during which a mystified
      Dan and David were introduced to various episodes from various
      seasons of Buffy, with a minimum of explanation. The questions
      came thick and fast ("How come she's had sexual relationships
      with two vampires? Isn't she supposed to slay them?") but a good
      time was had by all.

      Excellent company as always, but one of these days the Mel's Bourners
      will have to get out Nanny Ogg's Cookbook -- most of us have copies --
      and show the Sinneysiders how it's done...

      -- Drusilla D'Afanguin


      Our heartfelt thanks to Jason Anthony, who just gave us
      a splendid plug in DWM, which has resulted in a steady
      flood of new KFL memberships/WOSSNAME subs
      beyond our wildest dreams.
      If you did not get all 3 parts, write: jschaum111@...
      End of Part 2, says my computer -- continued on Part 3 of 3

      [Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
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