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Re: OT Self-esteem seminars re-visited

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  • priyadarshan44
    That was simply delightful. And I am not saying that just because I belong to your foundation. Priyadarshan
    Message 1 of 13 , Sep 12, 2007
      That was simply delightful.

      And I am not saying that just because I belong
      to your foundation.

      Priyadarshan
    • sharani_sharani
      What a laugh riot! The timing of this important announcement from the portion control foundation couldn t be better. While eating another calorie inducing (yes
      Message 2 of 13 , Sep 12, 2007
        What a laugh riot! The timing of this important announcement from the
        portion control foundation couldn't be better. While eating another
        calorie inducing (yes inducing not reducing) breakfast at Bruce's
        Bakery in Great Neck on Sunday, the conversation turned to the world
        of Weight Watchers and the number of our friends who have joined and
        are shedding pounds quite noticeably.

        I half-heartedly tried to play devil's advocate and pontificated on
        the relationship between large people and big hearts. Then I tried to
        say that if someone is *too* thin, I cannot but help but think of
        eating disorders and haunting images of concentration camp victims.

        Well can't say I didn't try but it seems we are all probably going to
        check out the program too - I've lost 9 pounds since the end of June
        just through tools like http://www.calorie-count.com but nary a soul
        has noticed - not even my good friends who see me all the time. Guess
        it has to be more than that to become apparent. So now I'm gearing up
        for lots of lawn grass - yum, yum! Can I chase it with a Lindt truffle?

        Sharani
      • tejvan13
        ... The funny thing is that many years ago, we had one of those annoyingly thin persons ask this very same question:
        Message 3 of 13 , Sep 13, 2007
          > Do you know a Naturally Skinny Person who keeps saying annoying > things
          > like: "Gee, no matter how hard I try, I can't seem to gain any weight"?


          The funny thing is that many years ago, we had one of those annoyingly
          thin persons ask this very same question:

          http://groups.yahoo.com/group/Sri_Chinmoy_Inspiration/message/8533

          I don't know who that person is. But, I do know that he can still eat
          at least 4 cakes per day and remain 3 stone underweight.

          We all have a cross to bear, I guess.

          Regards,

          Tejvan


          P.S. Mahiruha - I look forward to our 250 mile bicycle ride next time
          I'm in NY. I'm sorry we didn't make it last August.

          P.P.S. I have to say that lawn grass is not as attractive as you make
          it out to be.
        • vasanti_hd
          Ice-cream works great - but it has to be rich in fat and eaten in huge quantities right before going to bed - great with whipped cream. More advice maybe from
          Message 4 of 13 , Sep 13, 2007
            Ice-cream works great - but it has to be rich in fat and eaten in
            huge quantities right before going to bed - great with whipped cream.
            More advice maybe from Adhirata ...

            Vasanti
            (trying to shed some ice-cream pounds, I cane acriss a foolproof
            miracle diet: get up after breakfast, postpone lunch until dinner and
            go to bed before dinner. Not good for food-lovers, though.)

            Finally some jokes I once copied down for Sri Chinmoy who
            always enjoys innocent jokes and completely identifies with people
            trying to work on their weight:

            Two boys laughing at a fat woman. She looks at them and says: „I am
            fat and you are ugly. If I want, I can loose weight. But what will
            you do?"

            Doctor to fat man: „Boy, you have become heavy! At your weight, you
            should be at least two metres tall."
            Fat man: „Yes doctor, you are right. But I can eat as much as I want
            to – I just don't grow taller!"

            What is the easiest way for a married woman to get rid of a few
            excessive pounds? Get a divorce. (Hope this one will not be taken as
            offensive.)

            Garfield: I am not overweight - I am undertall.

            :)
          • cott_doris
            Vasanti, Vasanti! :-) I wish I could understand the mystery of gaining or not gaining weight. Doris
            Message 5 of 13 , Sep 13, 2007
              Vasanti, Vasanti! :-)

              I wish I could understand the mystery of gaining or not gaining
              weight.

              Doris
            • johnji_nz
              Nice tale Mahiruha. I hope you remain in the grip of the whimsical for quite some time. ... As one who can put weight on from 2 meals a day, let alone cakes, I
              Message 6 of 13 , Sep 13, 2007
                Nice tale Mahiruha. I hope you remain in the grip of the whimsical for
                quite some time.

                > I don't know who that person is. But, I do know that he can still eat
                > at least 4 cakes per day and remain 3 stone underweight.

                As one who can put weight on from 2 meals a day, let alone cakes, I
                can't say I sympathise with such a person. In fact I gained weight while
                marathon training—figure that one out!

                I put on 8 kilos (over a stone) weightlifting a few years back, and then
                a few more pie-lifting, which has less long-term benefit but is
                considerably more enjoyable to pursue.

                We have an expression in this part of the world for people a few rolls
                over a baker's dozen: "pie-eaters," as in "Who ate all the
                pies?", and I got immense joy the other day by discovering that the
                Australian rugby team's number one prop forward (normally the biggest
                players on the field), Matt Dunning, who has, less than fondly, been
                called a "Pie-Eater" here in New Zealand due to his less than
                athletic appearance, is the 2006 World Pie Eating Champion
                <http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/World_Pie_Eating_Championship> —an
                example of life imitating art so perfect as to be beyond the poetic.

                Somewhat tangentally, I am also reminded of several sayings of another
                man of substantial girth, Sir Winston Churchill, who to my enduring
                amusement was never one to let proprietary get in the way of a perfect
                quote:


                * Lady Nancy Astor: Winston, if I were your wife, I'd poison your
                tea.
                Churchill: Nancy, if I were your husband, I'd drink it.
                * Men occasionally stumble over the truth, but most of them pick
                themselves up and hurry off as if nothing ever happened.
                * Bessie Braddock: Sir, you are drunk.
                Churchill: And you, madam, are ugly. But in the morning, I shall be
                sober.
                * On Clement Attlee: There's less to him than meets the eye.
                * We didn't come this far because we are made of sugar candy.
                * We are all worms, but I do believe I am a glowworm.

                John-Paul
              • sharani_sharani
                Now if we could only get Mahiruha to riff on the subject of tiredness as well. With an embarrassing sigh of relief, I m treasuring a quiet day off this Friday
                Message 7 of 13 , Sep 14, 2007
                  Now if we could only get Mahiruha to riff on the subject of tiredness
                  as well. With an embarrassing sigh of relief, I'm treasuring a quiet
                  day off this Friday - the first one spent at home since my work
                  schedule went on steroids after Labor Day.

                  The part of me that is a creature of habit is happy to have a former
                  night shift back again. However, the overall business of working two
                  night shifts which start 30-45 minutes earlier than before and staying
                  a little longer on day shift days is finding me in recuperation mode
                  by the time my alternating half days at the end of the week roll around.

                  Last weekend in the spirit of seeing the silver lining in the impact
                  of budget cuts on the job, I rushed off to NY after my now short
                  Friday shift. Once in NY, it was all I could do to stay awake during
                  the Friday night public seeker meditation. At least by Sunday, I was
                  revived enough to have a sweet meditation experience that I wrote
                  about here yesterday.

                  Maybe my riff can take comfort in the notion that as my job is
                  probably giving me a few new gray hairs, at least when I venture to
                  colour them at the hair salon I'll feel like I have enough gray to
                  feel like I'm getting my money's worth. Hopefully, with time this too
                  will eventually feel normal in my rollercoaster ride of change at work.

                  winkin, blinkin and noddin,
                  Sharani
                • cott_doris
                  Dear Mahiruha, I sympathise with any kind of problems with others. But it is hard for me to appreciate this kind of humour. It is just too close to gossip. Why
                  Message 8 of 13 , Sep 14, 2007
                    Dear Mahiruha,

                    I sympathise with any kind of problems with others. But it is hard
                    for me to appreciate this kind of humour. It is just too close to
                    gossip.

                    Why do we always have to feel our problem is the worst?

                    Doris

                    P.S. I was very touched by your introduction of the latest editiion
                    of "inspiration letters."
                  • sarah_inseattle
                    Hey Mahiruha and everyone, I totally appreciate the humor and frustration associated with weight struggles--- as in trying not to gain weight. Afterall, I am
                    Message 9 of 13 , Sep 14, 2007
                      Hey Mahiruha and everyone,

                      I totally appreciate the humor and frustration associated with weight
                      struggles--- as in trying not to gain weight. Afterall, I am a
                      middle-aged woman. (!) However, may I just say something on behalf of
                      skinny people?

                      I was a skinny person well into my adulthood. I was just born that
                      way, or maybe my metabolism was high from anxiety or stress. In any
                      case, let me tell you, people literally *hated* me for being skinny.
                      I can remember eating in front of co-workers, who would say, and I
                      quote, "You're so skinny, you make me sick! I can't believe you can
                      just sit there and just eat [insert food here] without gaining
                      weight." I can't tell you the number of times I "made people sick."
                      Or they might say the actual words that they *hate* me for being so
                      skinny. Somehow, it was alright to comment on my weight and make
                      hostile, derogatory remarks in the name of thinness, whereas fatness
                      would have been totally off-limits. Maybe it was supposed to be okay
                      because "jealousy is a form of flattery," but let me tell you it hurt
                      my feelings because I felt their true resentment.

                      Fast forward to my years as a parent of teenagers. My own skinniness
                      is gone, but in the tradition of both my and my husband's skinny
                      youths, we now have a very skinny son. He has been teased so
                      mercilessly about being skinny, or told in no uncertain terms that
                      something is wrong with him, that for years he has not put on a pair
                      of shorts or a bathing suit, for fear of ridicule. No matter what the
                      temperature --- 102 degrees on a recent family vacation--- no matter
                      what the sport--- running, soccer, street hockey, swimming--- so
                      protective he is of not wanting to be teased. Some people have even
                      blamed his vegetarianism and have told him he needs to eat meat to
                      remedy the "problem."

                      So, please forgive me for feeling just a little pang at the idea of
                      wanting to "off" all the skinny people, even as a joke.

                      As for wishing that weight control was easier, I am all for all of
                      us.

                      Victory to our Souls!
                      Sarah
                      Seattle
                    • sharani_sharani
                      Hi Sarah, Humor rhymes with landmine sometimes despite one s good intentions. I really learned something from your post, never having been on the receiving
                      Message 10 of 13 , Sep 15, 2007
                        Hi Sarah,
                        Humor rhymes with "landmine" sometimes despite one's good intentions.
                        I really learned something from your post, never having been on the
                        receiving end of taunts for being thin - my flavor of adolescence
                        instead being a steady stream of verbal haranguing from my peers about
                        being ugly. Nowadays I find it cosmically ironic that I'm sleeplessly
                        seeking and seeing beauty in the world around me despite my own
                        charged past history and complex relationship with the concept.

                        It is sad to see the human capacity for any excuse to feel separate
                        and divided from others. And if only it were true that remarks on
                        "fatness would have been totally off-limits" as you write in your
                        post. I would venture to guess that enormous cruelty has been
                        perpetrated against those who struggle with being overweight.

                        When I was in college almost 30 years ago, I used to get credits
                        toward graduation for teaching an awareness program to freshmen in the
                        dorms on opening the eyes of white students to the oppression
                        experienced by African-Americans in America. Until the means to help
                        someone walk a mile in someone else's shoes is provided, it is not
                        surprising that awareness is lacking.

                        I am thus glad for the greater awarenesss inside me created by your
                        post on the subject and apologize if you took offense in my enjoyment
                        of Mahiruha's style of humor. I place it in the lineage of Don Rickles
                        and Woody Allen and wouldn't be surprised if he would be reluctant to
                        off a flea. Well I can't think of anything else to say so I'll just
                        close with a poem by Sri Chinmoy


                        My Lord Supreme,
                        Do tell me what I am supposed to do
                        When I feel unloved.
                        "My child, you and I are
                        in the same boat.
                        Do not worry.
                        Our boat will one day definitely reach
                        The destination: Love infinite."
                        http://www.srichinmoylibrary.com/sri-chinmoy-aspiration-plants/part231/90.html

                        Sharani
                      • clairegaian
                        Although a healthy weight now at 35, I was also a vile skinny person well into my 20 s. Mostly it was because of metabolism, running, anxiety, poverty, or
                        Message 11 of 13 , Sep 16, 2007
                          Although a "healthy" weight now at 35, I was also a
                          'vile skinny person' well into my 20's. Mostly it was
                          because of metabolism, running, anxiety, poverty, or
                          some combinatoon. Also, I have just never been that
                          much of an "eater", and am often sufficently distrated
                          by art, reading, gardening, etc to remember to eat.
                          Also, if acquiring food is too much of a bother, I
                          just don't.

                          Like Sarah I have been the recipient of plenty of
                          hostility for not having weight struggles. This is
                          particularly noticable at my job. At one point, I was
                          the only one of hte 8 women in my department who was
                          NOT dieting, counting points, or discussing
                          food/diet/suplements/excercise all day long (really -
                          all day long).

                          My favorite exchanges, though, are those when a
                          coworker initiates a conversation about food, as in
                          "what'd you eat for lunch?" and I quite innocently
                          reply "Oh I forgot to eat lunch." This is not a
                          calcualted response, it's just the truth, with no
                          emotioanl charge on my part. It invariably incites
                          exaperastion (at least they don't hate me), and I seem
                          to find it quite amusing after the fact.

                          I have offered many times to give them some of my
                          disinterest in food. If it was possible, I would.
                          For my part, after I passed 30, found happiness and
                          financial stabilty, and gained me some weight, I was
                          relieved. Evenetually I gained a bit too much weight,
                          and was physically uncomfortable, but I was more
                          fascinated than upset by this turn of events.

                          I finally decided it was enough, stopped eating when I
                          wasn't hungry, & started to walk every day. I dropped
                          the pounds without much effort (incurring wrath &
                          wonder again) and now am happily maintainig. I feel
                          fortunate to have dodged the image-consciousness
                          bullet; I'm a lot more concerned with how I am doing
                          inwardly than how much I weigh or if my hair is nice! :)
                        • sarah_inseattle
                          Hi Sharani! No offense taken, by you or anybody else. I only posted to show another side. Love the aphorism you posted! Thanks for all your kind thoughts.
                          Message 12 of 13 , Sep 17, 2007
                            Hi Sharani!

                            No offense taken, by you or anybody else. I only posted to show
                            another side.

                            Love the aphorism you posted! Thanks for all your kind thoughts.

                            Sarah
                            Seattle
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