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24009From My Diary

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  • cott_doris
    Sep 3, 2009
      The most beautiful event was when we walked past Guru's house on his birthday!!! First we walked soulfully past his Samadhi at Aspiration-Ground. A group of singers sang Guru's songs most soulfully.

      Slowly a long silent queue walked uphill along familiar streets to the house where Guru lived for many years. As soon as his house came in sight I felt a strong energy entering my heart ever so powerfully. I took a deep breath and looked at his shoes that were placed in front of his chair both in the frontyard of his house displayed in a way as if he had just left and would come back soon. Here I felt Guru's presence or he made me feel his presence would be more appropriate to say. We were allowed to walk past three times. I had a poem in mind and tried to write it down later but I failed two times and gave up.

      Two stories of Guru came to my mind while passing by his house. One was about the woman that had a dog and once protected Guru therefore he called her his friend. I thought it must have been here where it happened. Guru has written many stories about incidents that happened near his house. These stories are in the Run and Become books. I love these books so much because they make me feel close to Guru.

      The other story was about the mother that was forced into a circle to fight for her own child that had been abducted by another woman but out of love she didn't. She loves her child too much as to pull on him hurting him.

      As we walked for the third time past Guru's house I looked into the window and saw Guru's watch standing on a table. It must have been one of those that were often placed near his chair. He seemed to like watches. Time was very precious to him.

      In the little front yard I discovered an artificial deer sitting peacefully in the grass it reminded me of the deer I placed in the backyard of a disciple's enterprise it made me smile.

      Too quickly we passed by though we walked slowly.

      A radio was broadcasting the daily news and some silly advertisment. I wish I could describe with words how it felt just coming from this holy, holy place only to listen to mundane radio news. But Guru's vibration was so strong it all paled into insignificance. I thought this was something I have to learn that divine consciousness and ordinary human consciousness live together in the outer world but should not influence me. We are protected by God's all-pervaiding divinity. Will I ever be grateful enough?

      Here in front of Guru's house I felt homey, I felt that alone to experience Guru's nearness here it was worth to come back to New York. I envyed each and every tree around for their permission to reside here permanently even old autumn leaves from last year I envyed. All were allowed to stay here though it was the negligence of the neighbors to take them away. I envyed the uneven concrete we stepped on whose edges were lifted by strong tree-roots you have to be careful not to stumble, the squirrels that were climbing the trees, the fences that separate people from each other, the hedges and last not least the local disciples.

      At one corner of the street beautiful red zinnea was blossoming. Zinnea are very old flowers I love them. They may blossom there forever and I may blossom somewhere else.

      We had to leave many other disciples were waiting in the streets to get the chance to see Guru's house and receive his inner blessings.

      Still in meditative consciousness I walked slowly back to Aspiration-Ground. Soon after again I missed the intensity of Guru's presence!

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