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Re: How do I answer this?

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  • ninahrabar
    Dear Deepak: You are right, I have been through much hardship, and now, I appreciate every one of them, why, because i never let go of gohonzon, or sensei,
    Message 1 of 1 , Mar 1, 2000
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      Dear Deepak:<br>You are right, I have been
      through much hardship, and now, I appreciate every one of
      them, why, because i never let go of gohonzon, or
      sensei, or the gohso. That's why all my nightmares,
      changed into golden memories. <br>I think perhaps, you
      are having doubts, self worth doubts. Now that you
      have the Gohonazon, and love to do kosen rufu, all i
      can say is:<br>"Don't Worry."<br>I too had my
      greatest struggles during my second year. But i used
      everything to strengthen my faith, never complaining. When
      life was tough, i increased my daimoku, therefore, i
      never suffered, because i alwaays had a joyful internal
      existence. It is most rewarding to achieve victory right
      after total defeat has been realized. Most leaders
      would say, chant to the very last minute, i changed
      that to "chant until the minute after failure" Because
      when you are new, it is a constant question to
      yourself, am i doing the right thing, is this really
      working??? Once you amke up your mind that you will practice
      throughout your life, even if this benefit does not occurr,
      then you will break through. I did experienced that
      early on. I was broke and exhusted and no result were
      coming, and i was out of time. I kept chanting,
      wondering, desparately struggling to do the right thing. As
      i sat there and admitted my defeat, thinking, well
      maybe it didn't work this time, hmmm, well, I 'm gong
      to pracrtice for my whole life anyway, NO MATTER
      WHAT!!!! 2 seconds later the phone rang, it was a long
      distance call, telling me i had $10,000 in a ceritfied
      bank account and if i needed the money, it was in
      between quarters and I could withdraw it. So the whole
      defeat thing was like a test of faith. Do you really
      want to become a buddha, or are you going to let this
      one little unachieved goal create enough doubt to
      quit?When you set your heart on KR, although we must be
      responsible, you have nothing to fear. Your true purpose will
      unfold naturally.<br>You said people are on your case
      aabout self management? Well manage your time for KR and
      the gohonzon will see to it that all your
      responsibilities are taken care of. You can't imagine how much
      help i get in my personal life so i can be free to do
      KR. I work once a week instead of 5 days, i have my
      brother clean the house and tend the kids, everywhere i
      look there is support, because that is what i do for
      KR. Never be afraid to put KR first, you always get
      both. If you put your personal life first, then you not
      only don't get both, you lose the fortune that enables
      you to do even more KR in the future.You can't see
      the fortune with the naked eye though, and it does
      take time to accumulate fortune. But as Julie said,
      bring it on!!! Way Cool!!! It's about time!!! It really
      does happen. And it totally natural. I can say that
      much of the benefit that i enjoy today came from my
      daimoku when i was new. Can you even imagine for a moment
      what that means to you?? It means that not only do you
      enjoy the benefit occurring right here and now, but
      will continue to feel the benefit 22 years from now.
      That is how fortune is accumulated. Most important
      though is your mind of faith. Be resolved to continue,
      No Matter What, then your future is secured. And, if
      you have questions, i used the gosho called "on
      Attaining Buddhahood" to navigate my life for about the
      first 14 years. Every problem i had i would open that
      gosho and find the answer. You might check it
      out.<br>BTW<br>i have opened my own site. It's really new; but i
      will be posting my favorite all time guidances there.
      they are guidances that were very helpful to me in the
      building of my faith during the first 10 years. Also, i
      want to discuss esho funi on many different levels,
      becasue it is the primary point in this
      practice.<br>kansai-spirit@onelist.com<br>any help would be appreciated<br>Nina H
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